Do you feel that ABJD's compensate for something you don't have IRL?

My dolls definitely fulfill some things for me that I certainly would never be able to IFL. I am 58, short, kinda plump, and have too many aches, pains and now...wrinkles! Blah! I ALWAYs wanted to be (pick the era)...Catwoman, Honey West, any of Charlie's Angels, a Baywatch beauty, Wonderwoman, Laura Croft, Neytiri...but none of the characters even remotely looked like me...ok maybe Kathy Bates and even Mama Cass Elliot at one time..but not like Milla Jovovich as Leeloo or Alice of Resident Evil. So my dolls do it for me. Especially Luna Tamer in her Chimera incarnation. She is me if I could be. Maybe that is a bit neurotic but they really do strike at the heart of me.

 

The ease with which they can be reinvented. And also, Flawless skin!

 

Yes, they are a step inside imagination
The embodiement of any thing their owner might decide.

 

I think for me the dolls allow me to explore sides of fashion that I myself would never wear.
That's not to say that I don't also have lots of doll clothes that fall into what I would wear.
It lets me also get away with looks that my body cannot pull off. I'm of a shorter stature, so naturally I'm drawn to a longer leaner-legged doll, in my case the A-line Minifees, so that I can dress them in clothes meant for those legs.
I also really enjoy seeing truly innocent looking female friendships. I rarely had female friends growing up because I couldn't stand for the fickle nature of many of the girls I met. Friendships seemed to be faked more often than not. With these dolls I want to depict the kind of group that I would have wanted to be part of in my late teens and early 20s.

 

Yep. Non fluctuating weight. My life sure lacks that. Also I lack a penis. My boy doll have those. I also lack great clothes. I wear scrubs. The dolls out - dress me without a doubt.

 

They don't compensate for anything. They DO provide a nice source of sanity when life is getting rough, but I enjoy the dolls because I'm into dolls. If anything they compensate for the lack of dolls able to actually move when I was a kid but even that's a stretch!

 

It's difficult to say but I guess my dolls did full fill something in my real life like being models of fashion for me. I really like to sew clothing but because I haven't learned from school or sewing class before. I can't make them in real human size yet but my dolls helps me to become model for mini size clothes and let me practice; lower budget for buying fabrics and saving money from buying big quantity of materials. So I really enjoy to have my dolls. Another thing is, they can be my friends when I get depressed or some bad things just happened in my life. I have friend and family but sometimes I just don't want they know much and make them worry about me. So when I cry, I feel good that at least there has my dolls as someone beside me.

 

I don't think anyone here has answered anything similar to what I'm about to say but here goes!

I'm Muslim, and unless you've been living under a rock you probably know that Muslim women are required to wear modest clothing and to not reveal their hair :P My dolls are the complete opposite of that lol! I cannot wear cute miniskirts or flaunt my hair out in public, so I use my dolls as a way to express my own flair and have them wear all the pieces of clothes that I cannot. Mind you, someone here will probably think I'm being 'oppressed' and take this the wrong way, but I'm completely happy and satisfied with my religion.

I am actually able to wear most of the things, just not out in public, but thats the thing. I would love to show off my outfits for the day and such, most of which involve normal short sleeves and pretty hairdo's of the day, so my dolls can have that. They can do their own OOTDs, haha! They can wear crop-tops and pretty flower headbands and it doesn't matter ^^ I think that's partially why I tend to go for the edgy modern clothing more than the lolita fashion or fantasy/cosplay pieces, because they look awesome, and they really have that OOTD feel!

 

I have no family really - just one son - I wanted loads of kids so my dolls are my kids, quite simply. When I started out with bjd though I was trying to recapture my youth I think - I'm in my 50's but when I was younger I was attractive - it has been hard losing that to old age, although I know I'm lucky to have ever enjoyed it. My dolls though, are forever young and forever beautiful! I have become less interested in that aspect of dolls though, as the hobby progressed, and more interested in simply having kids to look after - probably as my son got older and more distant from me. I do also have a luts deertaur/centaur (I see her as a centaur) who represents my free spirit - she's not a child substitute - she's symbolic of something spiritual. I am trapped by domestic life at the moment, so I need a symbol of freedom I guess, just to remind me it exists!

 

I think that for me, having the dolls is a gateway to understanding the real world around me better.
Part of the reason I'm attracted to the dolls is for their appearance. I feel that if I'm able to make my doll look pretty, I would feel prettier myself in a way.

Adding backstories and personalities to the dolls is very important to me as well. In all of my characters, I add snipits of my own personality. I find that when my character has a part of my personality, I'm better able to understand it about myself. Giving them stories that I can relate to helps me to figure out what I can do to better my own life.

Dolls and their stories open my mind to new ideas and people that I otherwise would have trouble understanding or relating to.

 

I bet yes. Most of my dolls are males, you know, I never had relationship with handsome men, all of my boyfriend's looked good, but nothing more. I have many fantasy creatures, think, that it is compensation for trivial round.

 

One of my characters has met people and been to places/events I would have loved to have been it, but for various reasons (mostly that I was just a little kid at the time) I couldn't have been. So she gets to tell all these stories about hanging out with all the coolest bands. They also get to wear all the styles that I love but just aren't flattering for me. I have no problem with my body type, but nobody looks good in everything.

 

oooohh interesting,
to me my bjds make me smile..like looking at beautiful flowers that have been picked but dont die.
they are eternaly beautiful...who doesnt wish for that sometimes...and just like us in reality some of the outfits you dress them in dont look good..who hasnt been there?...soooo you toss that outfit aside and try another..eeee...its so fun.
they are fantasy and family ...love and trust.
they totally helped me through menapause because they do make you happy in many ways ...you interact with them and its very stimulating and fullfilling no matter what the situation...they are there to be touched and loved.
its a very good world with bjds in it...isnt it.
gotta love them

 

Honest question, I'm not mocking at all here. Has anyone there given you trouble about your dolls? I know some Muslims are against anything that even vaguely resembles an idol. I have seen a Muslim fashion doll though I forget her name at the moment, but BJD's are a whole other thing and I just wonder how people your life react, particularly since you say you're not inclined towards dressing them as conservatively as you do yourself. I can't help but think that it must be harder for you to collect under the circumstances. Do they ever give you are hard time or are they cool about it?

As for me, no, I don't think my dolls are compensating for anything. They are therapy for me when I need some. My real life can be less than tension free sometimes and a play session with the dolls or my cats can really help me to wind down and get rid of stress. If anything my animals are more like that for me. I never really wanted human kids. I really like kids but I also like giving them back at the end of the day and being a parent you cannot do that. It's 24/7 or forget it. I'm wise enough to know I'm not the best candidate for that. But my cats, they're totally kid substitutes for me. I'm their foster Mom. I openly say that and I don't care if people snicker. Anyone who sees me with my cats swiftly understands that is exactly what I am to them. My cats are attached at the hip, perpetual toddlers, both of them. Our bond is extremely strong and is very much like that of parent and toddler.

My cats are not independent like some. They're both my big babies emotionally speaking. As far as they are concerned I'm just this big furless Mama cat and even my vet jokingly calls my cats my kids because that's how they both act around me. They are definitely a maternal thing with me. Totally a replacement for the kids I never will have, but my dolls? Nah, they're definitely not. Most of them are teen or adult dolls actually...

 

I am a dreamer, an arm chair traveler, a book and history obsessed seamstress. My first thought upon seeing these dolls was," Finally, the perfect person to sew for!" I own dolls so that I can sew for them, er, not the other way around. I am a painter who adores perfect beauty. I love the exotic. So yes, definitely, my beautiful dolls compensate for any perceived lack in my own appearance. I am whitebread, middle America, in a corporate job. So my dollies are perfectly likely to wear unnaturally colored wigs, peacock feather show girl outfits, and electric blue sequins. They won't let me wear that stuff at work! It is all about living vicariously! I don't get to be a pirate in real life, so my dollies kindly do it for me.

 

I was never really into dolls as a child; I loved my dinosaurs and power rangers and my big green monster truck toy. BJDs for me are a means to create beauty in a more tangible medium. I love that they're something you can pick up and feel and inspect. I've been an avid gamer all my life, so I suppose it's akin to being able to create 3d game character models in a sense--but with my own hands instead of a program. I'm also using them as test fodder so one day I can make my own clothing.

 

Sometimes dolls can be like companions of sorts in a way when I am feeling lonely, but they by no means compensate for real, live people that are in my life. I suppose a good comparison would be like how some people have pets--I have my dolls.

I definitely think that my dolls complement who I am and serve as an extension of my imagination. My love of dolls (both ABJDs and off-topic) has helped me connect with other people that are part of a larger community. Furthermore, my dolls each have their own stories, through which I can experience different times and places.

 

Oh, definitely! Owning and customizing dolls is like playing in a giant sandbox. They can have attributes I myself admire or want, like blue hair, or the ability to fly. I think some people have the impression that doll owners simply live vicariously through their dolls and let life take a backseat, and I find that a trifle insulting. I like who I am! I just also like exploring different possibilities.

 

Hello there! I was wondering if you have ever lived through your dolls? I'm overweight so mostly my fashion sense is more comfy and what fits then stylish and cute, and I noticed that clothes I want for my doll are more cute and the style I would want to wear myself. So in other words I'm living through my doll in they way she dresses since I can't necessary do so myself. Have you ever done this, if so how? Thanks for your replies and time! (sorry if this was asked before) Oh one more thing, thank you to kimbapchan for her recent video who made me think of this! (glad I'm not the only one!)

 

Mine is pretty much the same, but in a wider range of areas.

I'm not slim. I'm not young. I'm not a child. I'm not an elf. I'm not female. I'm not living in Victorian, Georgian, Regency, Medieval or Edwardian times.

But I get to dress all of my dolls in things I'd look bloody stupid wearing. Of course I'm living through them.

Plus, it takes way less fabric to make doll clothes than human ones so it's a Win-Win situation!

EDITED TO ADD: Oh and I'm not a member of a large family of siblings, half-siblings, and cousins occupying a Victorian nursery with magical connections to the Elf Woods either (much as I could wish I were at times) but my dolls are!

Teddy