Do you feel that ABJD's compensate for something you don't have IRL?

Everyone wants to play with the exotic, I think. I don't know about all this "Fulfilling you because you're not perfect looking" deal. No one is, and if anyone thinks they are, there's always someone who can find faults with them.

Plus I never want to have kids, but I wanna mother over something cute, and dolls don't leave hair everywhere like kittens. And they stay where you sit them don't crawl into dangerous places.

 

It's better to talk to a doll than to myself...^^

 

I'm sure some people do experience different things through their dolls, makes sense to me, and that's ok and might even be therapeutical.

But that's not my case. My boy doesn't have a personality or an elaborate story, he's just a doll. He dresses as a gothic boy which is something I don't want to be Maybe he is the representation of my aesthetically perfect man? hmmmmm Who knows. But that's just because when you get a doll you make it as close to your aesthetical taste as possible.

When I have my girl she will have a lot of physical characteristics that I would like to have and don't, but then again... I don't consider myself ugly, I'm just different from what I see as perfection, and my notions of perfection, to be honest, are too anime-like to be achievable by humans

Bjds compensated my lack of... a very expensive hobby!

 

I think in some cases that might be true, some people use them to live out certain things. I myself don't reflect anything I feel I lack on my dolls.
they are more ideals a balance of flawed and perfect.

 

I just really like dressing people up, and tiny things fascinate me. Seeing as I don't have the resources to dress my friends up, and only occasionally design costumes for productions, dolls are a fun, challenging project where I have complete artistic control.

There are times when I think of my projects, doll related, or not, as my 'children' because of all the time and effort I've put into developing them, but I think that's pretty normal for someone who is as driven as I am to be constantly creating.

 

I feel exactly the same, and I think everyone put a bit of themself in everything they create; art, speek, music, clothing, characters, personalities for dolls, all that. It might not be much and it might be unconsciously, but still there will always be a little part of you in your creations that will let people see that this creation is yours. ((By creation I mean the doll as a whole, even if you didn't make it's face-up or clothes or anything, you were still the one to put that doll together.))

 

I think people shy away from the word "lack" because it implies that they aren't really whole human beings or are somehow pathetic? Not the case for many. I think that's why some people shy away from this question, just from that one word.

Personally, I originally got into dolls because I wanted something I could hold, something with a weight to illustrate my comic book characters. I think I still do XD But I don't mind leaving my dolls for days on end sitting on the shelf. To me, they're just cool dolls, not my life. I want to define my "lacks" in life by overcoming them, like self perception, career goals, etc... not really defined by dolls filling the need. O.o Does that sound cold? :X

 

Right on!

I agree with so MANY different arguments here and see so many sides (that's me, the girl with the kaleidoscope perspective) ...

How could you say your art and possessions don't reflect you? How does a psychologist or criminal profiler figure anything out at all?

And yet, it's just stuff.

And come on, odds are there's at least a few BJD owners who go a LEEEEEEETTLLEEE bit far into the creepy transference zone, just like with anything else (religious zealots, a dude who doesn't know that the cheerleader in Heroes doesn't actually exist, somebody with a 3,000 item bottlecap collection, etc)....

And some folks have them for the creative aspect ("I'll design it!"), for the company aspect ("We'll hang out!"), the instant model aspect ("I'm the Annie Liebovitz of Den of Angels!"), the Asian coolness bit ("Cool! It's Japanese!"), the self-transference thang ("I could NEVER wear these pants! But, oh, how I LOVE these pants!")...

Yes, having dolls means probably at least a LITTLE something about each of us, even if the only thing you could say with certainty is that we're the kind of people who think it's ok and fun and worth it to have expensive dolls. But there are SO many kinds of people here. There's a lot of ways we see these dolls. People have the same argument about EVERYTHING!

"Dogs are people, too!" /"Dogs are just dumb animals, people are anthropomorphizing them!"

"Kids need discipline!"/ "Kids need freedom to express themselves!"

"These are a reflection of my true self!"/ "These dolls are nifty, and I really get a kick out of 'em!"

So maybe somebody is using these dolls as some kind of therapy or support, but a lot of us are probably just enjoying the pretty shiny things, and having some creative, imaginative fun that we can share.




Thanks guys, I hadn't ever come into this part of the forum, but it seems the dialogue here is fairly civilized. If only you could run the cable news discussions!

 

The thing that they'd compense for me is in the clothes ^^; I really luv the lolita style but I can wear it.

 

I think my dolls make up for the fact that I had a crappy childhood. Now I can have something "nice" and it won't get taken away from me, or sold or whatever unless -I- want it to. You know?

 

Sure, the dolls help me forget about my pain for a while & lift my spirits.

I got slammed by an incurable illness in the 1990's that changed my life forever. Now, I live each day with chronic pain, fatigue, & depression. The dolls represent, for me, a way of distraction, a departure into a fantasy world where my pain doesn't exist. And, I believe that looking at beautiful things helps relax the mind, frees it up to enjoy what it sees.

 

Not really. I got my Yori because I love Sch A and he is just sooo pretty, I can't resist ~ I am attracted to him purely because he is pretty. Haha maybe I got him because I want someone that pretty to accompany me and in RL I couldn't find one (and I have never seen a person/object that captivating so far in my life).
Maybe unconciously I do, but I just don't realise it. BJD are objects of perfection in a way sooo maybe through Yori I am trying to create another image of myself as a handsome boy XD? Nevertheless Yori is a friend to me no matter what~ He has grown on me so much!

 

this is a really interesting topic and thanks for posting it.

I only own one doll and i own her because her face and the style i dress her in reflects things that i like in the world, mainly anime, all things japanese and clothes. Plus i love cute things, so whenever i see Squiggle sitting on my bookshelf i smile a little more than i would have if she had never been there.

I do agree that there is a certain element of creativeness and self image that i portray via squiggle, aka i aint no skinny girl! and plus no matter how thin i got i have the strange feeling that we could never share clothes! But i still manage to express myself creatively via other channels, so i dont feel that my doll is my only outlet.

I do love the communtiy aspect that you can get from sites like these though, as you can choose to discuss or dispaly your interest as and when you feel the need, i also find the private aspect of having a doll is nice because it is something that is yours and yours alone

as denkiva posted earlier

"It's a nice thing"

 

And that is exactly what i do. I can look at my doll and be distracted for a while without even having to do anything.

 

There are many empty places in my life but I don't think dolls compensate anything. Maybe, just a fraction of it. And I wouldn't like to look at the dolls in such a way - seeing them as a remedy for some of my problems. It's rather that I just enjoy them being with me.

 

I guess it isn't really something lacking within, but I know that I use my doll for escapism, giving him a fantasy storyline/clothes etc. to make up for the uneventful life I lead.

 

Initially, I started becoming interested in ABJD because being a woman of color, I lacked dolls that looked like me as a child. In case you're wondering, I am Filipino American with Spanish (Spain), French, Chinese, and possibly Middle Eastern in my ancestry. So all in all, I have a unique look. Although I loved my Barbie back in the day, she didn't look like me. In fact, she made me crave to look like her with blue eyes and blonde hair. I didn't realize thinking that way was so horrible because those were the images I was faced with on a daily basis.

I later found an African American Barbie whom I adored because she had dark hair like me and brown eyes. But yet again, I couldn't exactly identify with her because we didn't look the same. I also found Filipino Barbies, but unfortunately for a poor kid like me, expensive collector's items such as Filipino Barbie was a definite no. I did find a Filipino Barbie at an antique store when I was a teenager, but it only gave me more disappointment than identification. It was beat up, and looked like something you would buy at an airport terminal. Anyways, Filipino Barbie was just Barbie with brown hair, brown eyes, and a California tan. African American Barbie was at least ethnic looking.

I began wondering if I could ever find a doll that looked like me. To give where credit is due, Barbie now has Pacific Islander friends for Barbie, but now that I'm am an adult, it feels ackward to purchase one for myself. Then I found ABJDs. For the first time, I found a doll that had features similar to mine, even if not the same skin color (though now that's changing as well). I wasn't stuck with generic Asian features, but a wonderful array of beauties that could be considered distinctly ethnic to fantasy oriented. And considering the price of an ABJD, I can say it's a collector's item but still play with it like a little girl if I wanted to.

Although I have grown into my own woman and do not necessarily need a doll to identify myself with, it does heal that feeling I had as a child of "why do I look different?" and "how come I can't find dolls that look like me?" I now know that dolls that look like me weren't made back then because I'm ugly/different. I would like to think of it because the more exotic looking it is, the more expensive it will be.

 

opps...My bad!

 

I'm entering the field of photography and I've been a very shy photographer so far. I've had flourishes of inspiration from the youth culture here in Montreal. I took an introduction course at college and then up and bought a Canon A-1 kind of right in the throw of things becoming digital. I see a lot of controversy on the news regarding cell phone cameras and increasingly worse and worse photography. I live with my girlfriend and I've considered getting a male doll simply to dress him in things I am shy to wear in public like old victorian suits and nice hats things like this. I was very much pleased with stuff in Elephant Man and feel a great deal of longing for a period in which quality was more important than mere quantity. I'm disapointed with the constant need for materialism and feel much of the empathy through art in the world is becoming more and more lost with more and more uncertainty in ourselves in the world around us.

I decided on a female doll possibly to dress her in what I would like to see other people wearing but I've felt nervous about the prospect of my doll arriving naked or something like it and needing to 'care' for her by making clothes. I've used a sewing machine and feel very comfortable using one to start making dollish clothes. With the advent of digital photography I've considered making it a project to translate my visions with photography and the way I want to empathize with people or see people by photographing the doll in what I would deem appropriate.

Not sure what people think of that. The prospect of all of this is a lot to take in. I just feel being a part of this hobby is neat and I'll try it this way.

 

Does my my doll compensate for something in my life? Well I can say the same about my MLPs. My childhood lack most things and I felt i missed a big of the toys when i grew up but the things i get attached to like my BJD and one of mlp, they act as an extension of. I find it hard to commuicate with other poeple, I cna barely share how i feel without being terrified of the conciences of doing it. So I use other things to express me, I create sinarios of and say what they are feeling about it and that's how I get advice.
I know it's a little sad but I spent years being bullied, told that I look like a man and that I'm utterly useless. So expressing myslef is a big no no, my doll or my pony doing it or any other thing I'm connected to does it for me. I have a boyfriend who under stands me and he tries his hardest to get me to open up and realise I'm actuallu beautiful but it's hard and even if i get better my stuff isn't going any where, it has to much of a connection to me.

My bjd is me, a braver me but still a sad me. My boyfriend didn't take to her well at first but he coming around to her by the way I express my self through her because she shows more emotions with ehr movements even when i don't mean to.