Do you hide your hobby from certain people?

My friends are not the type to make anyone feel self-conscious about their interests. My significant other's friends on the other hand, wow, they make me cower from their judgmental commentary.

Now I'm very slow and careful about revealing my personal self to anybody because the character trait of "telling it like it is" AKA being a soul-withering narrow-minded snob toward anyone and anything you don't immediately relate to seems to be increasingly socially acceptable these days. I just have no energy to deal with it.

There are some people you can easily be yourself around, and I hope you will find those people as friends, but there will too be others in life to whom it is better to not "show your hand" (reveal your hobbies, passions, invite into your personal time and space.)

 

I have this one friend who is terrified of dolls, and this one other who said he didn't care about them. So those two I don't talk about my dolls with. The rest are fascinated! And even ask me about them from time to time. Of course, having been an arts student and having taken my dolls to school, those friends are really accepting. Arts students tend to have a tendency to collect things. And while I do like talking about my dolls, in the long run, my dolls are for my own enjoyment, not others'. I don't really mind people who don't care about my dolls. I love them and I'm not embarrassed, not a bit. It kind of helps me filter those who love me for me and accept my differences, and those who will talk about me on my back. Of course, I'm a girl. I'm sure being a guy is another story but, these dolls have given me and helped me so so much, that to me, it's something to be proud about.

 

I'm really open about it and none of my friends have cared. Maybe they're just too polite to say anything, lol. I've always been "weird" so when I started buying dolls, I really don't think it came as a surprise. I honestly wouldn't care what they thought it anyway, it's my money and it makes me happy so I'm gonna enjoy my hobby. Please don't let other people's comments get you down, it really doesn't matter what other people think. Of course, if you feel that someone would give you a hard time about it, you don't have to bring it up. There's nothing wrong with enjoying your hobby in private if you feel more comfortable that way.

 

As I've gotten older I've lost a lot of in-person friends (it took me a while to realize they weren't really friends, but once I realized that I stopped interacting with them and my life changed for the better) but my online friends know about my hobby. Sometimes they'll listen to me jabber on about 'em and even ask questions. That's what true friends do, they're open and honest with each other (and yes mild teasing is okay as long as both parties think it's funny). And I return the favor, and listen/support their interests even if it isn't my first choice - "isn't this doll cute?!" "It's not really my style, but if you like it then go for it" kinda thing...

I'm a woman, but I've still received some odd reception with my hobbies because they are not "social norm" - such as gaming, keeping pet rats and mice, and my many different types of doll collecting. I often have to explain myself, basically by pointing out all of the positives. My mother is often judgmental, or comes across that way; but when I explained how the dolls can increase in value, I can craft items and sell them for the dolls or paint the dolls it seemed to sway her opinion a bit. It's funny how some people are able to accept something if it has monetary value.

Also, mangameow is totally right about the "social norms" of bygone times. I often remind my husband and son of this, which they often roll their eyes and go 'we know'. My son likes the color pink, and a multitude of uncommon colors like brown and highlighter yellow, I don't - but both my husband and I let him get it because it's just a color. Same with clothes. I noticed that at his previous school, which is very illiterate and close-minded (which is why we transferred him when we could), he refused to wear certain things because they weren't for 'boys'. We talked it over and he now wears them at home or sometimes around town. Moral of that story, you don't have to shout your hobbies from the rooftops but you still can enjoy them at home. I personally don't hide my hobby, but if you ask then I'm happy to explain.

Here's another fun tidbit, mature adult dolls were first marketed to men! Barbie is a near replica of the Bild Lilli Doll.

 

My doll (with more on the way, yaaas) aren't a secret I keep from friends or family. They know about them up front because I have an entire album on my phone. Showing up at my house almost demands they meet Lu. My husband is actually the best at this, he didn't understand the appeal at first and simply thought she really likes this that's nice. Now though he's suggesting color palettes and names it's awesome! Some of my friends don't see the appeal of the expenditures that I put into them but they do understand how impossibly happy having them makes me. It's like every one else is saying, they are your interests not others, be proud and happy to have them because they bring you joy. And it's something that takes my intense focus off of them so they are very happy to have that buffer

 

Before I got into resin dolls, I used to be really into collecting anime figures, so my dolls don't really surprise any of my long time friends or any of my family. Any new friends I make tend to be into nerdy stuff too, so they don't seem to be weirded out? Or at least, as long as I don't tell anyone how much I'm actually spending. My partner is also into Warhammer, so no arguments about spending too much money there LOL
I'm still a student so I don't really "work" yet, but I'm hoping I'll find somewhere to work with an accepting enough company culture.
A lot of issues I get come from strangers mostly. I'm pretty shy so I don't like it when strangers come to talk to me normally. It's definitely worse when they approach me to let me know how weird I look carrying a large, strangely realistic doll.

 

My friends are aware of and supportive of my doll hobby. But all of us are big nerds (a title we use proudly), so it wasn't really a surprise to them when I started collecting, especially since I use them as a way to flesh out OCs that I will one day actually write books about. And even though they themselves don't collect dolls, they don't mind when I gush about them, and even actively ask me about them and my current doll projects. My parents, on the other hand.... while they are somewhat supportive, their reaction is more of the "smile and nod" variety, which I appreciate to an extent. It's better than outright dislike.
If your friends are not at least somewhat supportive of you and your hobbies, well.... I won't tell you to ditch them. I don't know your life, or the things that brought you and your friends together and keep you connected. But I will say that you can make friends in this hobby, who will be supportive, because hey, we're all big doll nerds together. You're allowed to have more than one friend group. My inbox is always open

 

Anyone who is close to me knows about them. It's one of my main hobbies, so if you have taken literally any time to get to know me, you should know I'm a doll collector. Most people aren't surprised, since I've been making my own dolls or restyling existing dolls since I was a kid, BJDs are just a more adult version of it all! I'm not ashamed or embarrassed by the hobby, I spent entirely too many years caring about that in the past. Since childhood, I've been the "weird" kid, and while I couldn't avoid bullying for it when I was in school, I can definitely choose who I hang around as an adult, and I just simply don't tolerate people who put me down for doing harmless things I enjoy. I don't expect people to love my dolls or treat them like living beings, I just ask that they respect the fact that I enjoy them. Oddly enough, the friends I hang out with the most are people I met in this hobby!

 

I have honestly never hidden my love for BJDs and so far I've gotten no negative reactions. My dad is really old guard (he's75) and he just has no interest in my hobby but he's never shown disapproval. I am a car guy and love hockey as well as being in this hobby so I think he sees it as one of my odd quirks. Otherwise, all my friends know and accept that it's part of who I am. I surround myself with open minded creative people. As for the general public, I've mostly experienced curiosity and ,honestly, I couldn't care less if someone asked weird questions. I'd answer honestly and leave it at that.

 

Currently I hide it from everyone except my boyfriend because he's very supportive and i think others would find it weird. My family will find out sooner or later though when I order a body for my floating head or a full doll, a small head box was easy to hide, a giant doll box not so much. Quite worried about how they will react, especially in terms of the cost. Going to try and hide that from them if I can haha.

 

My family members do not understand my hobby. But they will let me be as long as i keep my dolls in my room. But i still hide them about my dolls price. Hope they nener find out about that. If not, i will be in a big trouble haha

 

I get what you mean though. I told a couple of my friends and showed them pictures of my dolls and they thought they were really creepy and looked at me weird. So I keep them to myself.
My family and my significant other are the only ones I talk and show my dolls to.

 

Lol that’s what happened to me too! But yeah, no truer words spoken- I don’t tell anyone how much these dolls are.

 

Some do, some don’t, and most of them don’t really care.
And I don’t like people calling a person gay for having a hobby that’s considered more “feminine.”
I mean what’s so awful about having a girly hobby or being a gay?

 

Why care? I don't. LOL
I have tons of friends. I only keep those that can put up with me. (That sounds bad, but I'm not that bad LOL)
Be yourself and be confident. If they judge you, they're not your friends.

 

I try to sway my friends and family as much as is possible to my side LOL I've only snagged one so far. The others understand where I'm coming from. I mean I'm not pushy, I just sometimes get carried away talking customization and cuteness. (Most of them do think they are creepy but to each their own, I try not to push it too much with them.)

My mother's pretty bad for disliking them, but it's not stopping me. I just make sure she doesn't know when I get a new package in the mail now.

I'm never shy from talking about it with strangers, just in case they know what I'm talking about, lol. Usually, it doesn't come up in normal conversation, so it's not something I worry about. XD I'm currently dating someone and he's seen the collection, but idk if he knows what's up with it. :3c He still seems interested tho, so maybe I've caught a keeper.

 

My friends actually introduced this hobby to me and I'm grateful to them because i really love my dolls right now. Its fun having the same hobby as your friends... morw opinions regarding stuffs hahahah

 

They know but we do not really talk about the dolls since that is not their hobby though if they have questions about my dolls I answer them.

 

I keep the hobby from my dad’s side of the family since I want their approval and I’m afraid what he might say about the hobby. I don’t really care what my mom thinks, or really even what absolute strangers think.

 

Some of my friends are artists, so they actually enjoy looking at my dolls and hearing my plans for them.
The rest of them either just make jokes or are just afraid of them, so I don't talk about my dolls with that group of friends.