Fear...(Directed towards the Guys)

I've liked dolls ever since I was a child. I always played with Action Men and Barbie and my parents never seemed to mind. When I first started to explore the hobby I felt really embarrassed about the whole thing and it was only when I ordered my first doll that I told my mother and sister. I used to say that I wanted it for "art" (drawing poses etc.). When they knew i stopped caring what people thought and now no one actually cares. I now have four dolls and the only time they are ever brought up is when I order new clothes/a new doll.

 

Since this thread's been bumped, I guess I'll answer.

1-Did you grow up liking dolls or did you only recently start to like them when you learned of the BJDs?

I didn't like them one bit. In fact, I've known about BJDs and known BJD owners for over ten years, but it wasn't until about two years ago that I saw any dolls I liked (Dollfie Dreams), and not until last summer before I discovered that all BJDs weren't effeminate boys with goth makeup (not that there's anything wrong with liking those) like the ones my friends owned and that there were ones out there that I really, really liked. (Some of which are in my signature because I bought them, and I've liked all the ones my GF has bought as well, a Fairyland Chloe, Supia Haeun, and Iplehouse Shane and Arvid.)

It took me a long time to be cool with any miniature representation of a woman, actually. It wasn't until '07 that I finally broke down and started buying figures of anime characters, something I'd thought was creepy for the longest time.

2-Were/are you apprehensive about allowing people other than other BJD admirers see your dolls?

Incredibly. I still keep it very close, and while I let my friends in the anime community know about it, I keep it from everybody else. I have certain friends who are into dolls, and some who appreciate them, and I share my stuff with them, and not really anybody else. If it weren't for the fact that I got into this together with my girlfriend, I never would have bought them to begin with, but at least this way I can blame them on her!

3-In what ways do you try to deal with this?


I don't really have an answer to that. I just don't let people I know won't approve of them know about them. I'm only OK with it when I can "blend in", either as a group of doll owners or at a large event where everybody's weird, like an anime convention.

 

1-Did you grow up liking dolls or did you only recently start to like them when you learned of the BJDs?
To be honest I grew up liking every toy. I played with action figures leggos, hot wheels etc. I even played barbies with my sister. My dad hated it, but he did like the fact that spent time with her.
2-Were/are you apprehensive about allowing people other than other BJD admirers see your dolls?
A little. When I got my first doll I flew to miami with him and showed my family. A lot of them didn't really understand, however my uncle was fascinated. My cousins thought he was creepy but they respected me still. I even did powerpoint presentation about it in college and a lot of people were impressed.
3-In what ways do you try to deal with this? living in Atlanta (especially the south) there are a lot of closed minded people. So I just kind of keep my dolls in the house. I deal with it simply by not telling anyone unless I feel comfortable. Sometimes, I wish I could take my doll out to new locations, but I just haven't gotten to that position yet. I am glad that I am not the only male that likes the beauty of these dolls. >.<

 

1-Did you grow up liking dolls or did you only recently start to like them when you learned of the BJDs?

Yes, I did. I had all sorts of G.I. Joes, Ken Dolls and even a 16" Knight with full armor, lance and his own horse. The next Christmas after getting the Knight, my Dad bought me an Indian Chief from the same company.
However I was not allowed to play with my older sister's dolls because I shaved their heads, made table napkin parachutes and tossed them off the roof.
I think my parents preferred the dolls over the live snakes, lizards, and toads that would crawl out of my pockets during dinner.

2-Were/are you apprehensive about allowing people other than other BJD admirers see your dolls?

Am I apprehensive of other people outside the hobby no, from people inside the hobby, yes.
I'm rough on my dolls; the person who introduced me to the hobby freaked out on me because I washed a doll wig. I make my own wigs with sideburns and use rubber cement to keep them from rolling up. One person reacted to this like I committed murder. It's not like I didn't test this process on the resin beforehand.

What bothers me is the attention, despite my bravado, I'm a tad shy. Going to a doll meet in the city someone on the train asked what I had in the bag; I showed her. Suddenly I've got six - seven women cooing and awing over of him; asking all sorts of questions about him. I'm proud that I made his clothes, did his face-up and made his wig but embarrass by the attention at the same time.


3-In what ways do you try to deal with this?

I over fifty, black and gay; I've dealt with worse in my time.
What some stranger, who won't affect my life for more than fifteen minutes, thinks of me playing with dolls doesn't matter to me. My family has learned a long time ago that I've got my own path despite any pleading, threats, or bribes.

 

1-Did you grow up liking dolls or did you only recently start to like them when you learned of the BJDs?

1. I used to have action figures, but strangely enough, I always liked best the one token female action figure in every line. The other guys said it was gay to like the one chick as opposed to the very muscled guys, but I just thought girls were prettier. For some action figure lines, all I ever got was the one girl!
Later on in high school I had a friend who worked as an embalmer in a funeral home. Because he had to be on call, he got live on the floor above the funeral home. He was big into anime and had converted the attic into an anime figure display room. I was I. Awe of how cool it was. He gave me a couple of tiny anime figures. As a gift and that set me off into that hobby.
After college I got into miniature war gaming, because the actual miniatures looked beautiful when painted. The female ones were still my favorite.
Easier this year I discovered the figma line of anime action figures and was blown away by their poseability.
Then I discovered bjds... At first the anime ones, but oh man, then I saw the more realistic ones... And decided to take the plunge.


2-Were/are you apprehensive about allowing people other than other BJD admirers see your dolls?

Yes I am. Very.

3-In what ways do you try to deal with this?

3 I told a few close friends about it. I joined forums to be in touch with the online bjd community and know there are other guys out there too. And I'm trying to muster up the drive to eventually go to a meet and get to know real bjd fans, not just read about them.

 

Another female side commentary here: Props to you guys for pursuing what you love.
I am Conservative in most ways. I am what most people, especially here, would probably call "not open minded enough" or "too into traditional gender roles". But if my own boyfriend/husband, when I have one, and if my sons, when I have them, like dolls, I don't see anything wrong with that. An interest in a particular hobby doesn't define one's sexuality, and dolls are cool. There is no hobby that only one gender is "allowed" to like.

 

I'm a girl, but anyway..

I have two younger brothers. I guess they kind of looked up to me when we were kids, and I'm a very creative person so I was always coming up with interesting games and stuff. Because I've always loved playing with dolls, they would play with me. And we weren't just dressing dolls up and stuff, I would make up these elaborate plots about murder and conspiracy, and we'd have a blast. It got to the point where I was outgrowing the games, and they'd cry for me to play with them. XD But my dad was mean and called them sissies and teased them and made them feel bad about themselves. My mom was supportive when they were only playing with Kens, but when one of my brothers wanted his own Barbie, she got really mad and started sort of 'picking on' him, too. We mostly played outside, and we lived on a rather huge piece of property, so we got away with that without being bothered too much, really.

My brothers totally outgrew the hobby, though. I'd say it's a shame, but when they lost interest, I took their dolls. XD Some of them are collectibles! (For example, Rio of the 'Jem' line from the 80s.) I think it's awesome that there are guys that continue to play with or at least collect into adulthood.

 

I grew up playing with my sister's Barbie's. My dad despised it and forbade me to ever go into her room to play with her, but my mom let me sneak in when he wasn't home. As I entered middle school, my friends introduced me to Japanese culture, fueling my inevitable obsession. I picked up a TIME magazine that had an article on BJD's, one thing led to another, and here I am 8 years later with my first BJD.

Nowadays, my interest in Japan has faded, but I look at the dolls from a different perspective. To me, they are yet another outlet for expression. I'm still apprehensive about sharing my interest with others. The only ones that know about my doll are my self-proclaimed weaboo friend from high school and my boyfriend, who'd rather pretend it doesn't exist. Different strokes for different folks, but always remember that your hobby doesn't define who you are. The least you can ask from anyone is respect. Your hobby can be a personal endeavor, and there's nothing wrong with that. If you find other people that want to share it with you, celebrate and explore with them. I met a wonderful girl through the hobby and I treasure talking to her about everything.

Bottom line, the hobby transcends gender whether or not other people look at it that way or insist that anything doll-related is a "girl thing," or a "creep thing," or any other irrelevant category they can come up with. It's your hobby, so have fun with it. I know I have.

 

1-Did you grow up liking dolls or did you only recently start to like them when you learned of the BJDs?

I grew up liking dolls. From barbies to polly pocket, baby dolls, ragdolls, porcelain dolls...I even had one doll that was anatomically correct and it poo'd and pee'd when I fed it water/instant potato -type stuff (it was a baby doll). I stopped collecting my dolls when I went into highschool. At that point there was a common consensus in the house that I was now too old to collect dolls. My parents joke about how in elementary + middle school they bought me toys/dolls, highschool they bought me clothing/electronics and now in college they are back to buying me toys/dolls. lol. I don't collect barbies of any other types of dolls really but that is because my taste in dolls has changed as expected.

2-Were/are you apprehensive about allowing people other than other BJD admirers see your dolls?
Yes, especially when I was playing with barbies up until about age 12. I am still worried people might think I am some type of creeper or crazy lady lol XP

3-In what ways do you try to deal with this?
I say "collect" instead of "play"
Sometimes I add in " well, it's an artistic hobby, I paint/photograph etc (I blame my love for dolls on childhood nostalgia)" OR I say "I don't smoke, I don't drink, I don't party I need to enjoy life somehow!". I think most the time people are more worried about the character of a doll collector than the actual dolls.

 

Did you grow up liking dolls or did you only recently start to like them when you learned of the BJDs?

I don't remember much, but I do remember if my sister had it, I wanted one too, so when she got a doll I wanted one too. Never played with it when I finally got it though. I liked playing with pokémon figures or animal statues or LEGOs way better. Whenever there was a doll in my play-pretend it was always as the always-sleeping owner of the magically talking pets, or something like that. When I got into the whole EGL-EGA thing I went and bought a few porcelain dolls, and then I found BJDs, and then I threw out those porcelain dolls because they were kind of creepy. Dolls are more valuable to me that I can play with them, like BJDs, instead of just sitting there like porcelain ones...

Were/are you apprehensive about allowing people other than other BJD admirers see your dolls?

I am definitely apprehensive about anything public. I don't take my doll out unless it's a meet and I do feel a little awkward walking into the restaurant/park/where-ever with the doll on my shoulder. But once I meet up with the usual people that apprehension fades because I'm in a group, and <at least I hope> the members of our group would support each other if one of us was being harassed.

All my older or closer friends know of my hobby and they don't care because they're past the whole gender role thing, but my peers don't know. I would prefer to keep my hobby under wraps because my male peers are SHORT HAIR GO TO THE GYM TREAT WOMEN LIKE SEX OBJECTS kind of people. I would be far less guarded about disclosing my hobby to female peers, since they are either more understanding or they really don't give a flying F. I'm pretty confidant that I can read people for their character, and that the people I choose to disclose my hobbies to will be chill about it. I mean, I've already publically admitted to owning Hello Kitty items, I don't think dolls is too far a leap.

In what ways do you try to deal with this?

Pick my friends carefully, I guess. If someone can be considered my friend, they must be willing to accept who I am, as I am. If they are unable to deal with that then they are not my friend. And why would someone who is not my friend need to know about my hobbies?

 

Did you grow up liking dolls or did you only recently start to like them when you learned of the BJDs?

My interest in dolls moved along a curve. When I was very young (4, 5 years old), I liked looking at the pretty dolls that were in the ads in the TV Guide back in the early 90s. I would also collect the ads. My mom was surprisingly supportive of this, but she never got me any of the dolls. When I hit 6 or 7 years old, I stopped liking dolls completely until I turned 22. I just didn't care for them at all during that time.

Were/are you apprehensive about allowing people other than other BJD admirers see your dolls?

I am... very apprehensive about it. I don't have many close friends that live nearby anymore, so that helps, but I don't take them out anywhere there wouldn't be any other doll fans. In fact, I've only taken dolls outside of my home twice. The first time was last summer when I did an outdoor photoshoot in the backyard garden. I made sure to do it when I had the day off, in the middle of the day when most people would be at work, and I got all of the shots done as quickly as possible before hustling back inside. The second time was when I took my ABJD to a doll meet. That was okay with me due to it being a doll meet.

I absolutely do not let coworkers know about them. I have one coworker who is a friend, but I've never had him over because I don't want things blowing up at work just in case word gets out about my dolls. When he stops being a coworker, I won't have any problems with him seeing my dolls, though.

When it comes to my parents, I couldn't do much to deflect their ability to make comments, but they still annoy me sometimes. My mom actually got strange about it. She seriously called my dolls "baby dolls". Mind you, I only had one Dollfie Dream at this time, and there's nothing immature about them. One time I got so fed up that I told her "look, she could feed babies with her... anatomy... so why are you calling her a baby?" My dad one time said I had serious problems, but I brushed that comment off. He's since become tolerant of my dolls. He didn't even have anything negative to say about me going to a doll meet.

In what ways do you try to deal with this?

Well, it all really seems to take care of itself. I just about never find myself in situations where it will be a problem. Even the doll meet thing wasn't a problem with me. I was more nervous about actually making it there than I was about being a guy at a doll meet with a little girl doll. I was mildly worried about "eww... pedo..." thoughts from non-doll people who might have been passing by (it was in a public place), but with the understanding and support from the doll people that were there, I was sure I would have been fine.

 

I'm not a guy, but I have to say how upset I am that she threw away your dolls I don't think dolls are just for girls. And I also think it's wrong to do something like that to try to keep your child from being "strange." You should accept your child for who they are and what they like, unless it causes harm to yourself or some one else. Who do dolls harm? No one.
My fiance actually had a barbie growing up, he bought it at the store with his own money and he told the store person it was for his sister. He's an only child. He played with it and he brushed it's hair and if it got dirty he cleaned it, he took care of it. His mom thought it was cute and laughed.
My heart goes out to anyone, guy or girl, who's had to deal with anything like this

 

Well better try to reply to this before the mods decide to close it.

Anyway

Did you grow up liking dolls or did you only recently start to like them when you learned of the BJDs?
I had a Todd doll when I was little kid, but mostly so I could play with my sister and her barbies. Though when taking Todd swimming finally ruined him lol, I used my star wars action figures to play with her barbies. Apparently Barbies are into much shorter men lol. Most of my action figures as a kid though were Transformers, so not very doll-like.

Were/are you apprehensive about allowing people other than other BJD admirers see your dolls?
I have kept my bjds a secret from my family from the beginning and I intend to continue doing it until I'm able to move out. Other doll people have told me that it just makes it worse when they do find out...but I'd rather take the risk. My parents, my dad especially has never been very open about stuff...AT ALL. Thus far non doll people haven't seen my dolls. Unless you count the people in the doll/antique store. I have told a couple of my friends and showed them pictures, but none of them have seen them in "person." My dad had like a nervous break down b/c I started sewing so telling him about my dolls just doesn't seem like the best idea.

In what ways do you try to deal with this?
I keep all my girls in their boxes until everyone goes to bed, or if I'm home alone. Though living at the bottom of the stairs with no definable room yet makes it nerve racking sometimes. My dad doesn't respect my privacy AT ALL. So when I have my girls out they're always within reach and their boxes usually aren't far. Also I keep a blanket nearby to throw over them if necessary. It's not all that fun since, b/c they're all in boxes hidden around my "room" in clothes drawers, behind stuff on bookshelves and under my bed, I usually only get 1-2 of them out at a time. I find that I become partial to my newest one. My DD has become somewhat neglected. partially b/c she's not resin but also b/c of the whole living in their boxes thing.

 

1-Did you grow up liking dolls or did you only recently start to like them when you learned of the BJDs?
I always liked them, sure. Didn't play with them or anything, but I didn't think they were "dumb" like other kids seemed to.
Was crazy with my little G.I Joes, Star Wars action figures, Transformers, etc. Figures and all that stuff were my childhood, lol.
Being one of 3 boys in the family, there weren't any Barbies in the house or anything, but my friends had sisters & I had a couple cousins, etc... so there were dolls around. I played with some when I babysat kids around the block and stuff & it was fun.
Never was around any as nice as BJDs though. Only became aware of them this year, and something clicked in my head a couple months ago and I decided I needed one(some)

2-Were/are you apprehensive about allowing people other than other BJD admirers see your dolls?
Extremely. Only one other person even knows I have an interest. And she's across the country, we just talk online. She's the one that introduced me to BJDs!
I don't feel comfortable telling anyone else, not even my closest friends or family. I just don't feel like they'd be accepting, and would be critical and judgmental. I've never really given any indication that I'm into dolls before, so it would be a shock to them. My family has always been pretty "traditional" as well. I've always been the open minded one, not them.

Heck, I threw quite a wrench in the gears when I went and got a tattoo. Years later, I'm covered in them... Probably only reinforces the shock people would have if they learned I was into BJDs, haha

3-In what ways do you try to deal with this?
Since nobody knows, I just keep it to myself and enjoy the hobby on my own time.
I've got my one girl locked up in a protective case (which blends in nicely with the other 5 or 6 locking cases I have in my room for all sorts of expensive electronic items I have for other hobbies). I can bring her out at my apartment when my brother/roommate is at work or at night.
I only hope that the next woman I meet will be as open minded as me. And if I'm lucky, into BJDs as well!


Oh, and my friends always look at me weird and give me crap when I choose to be a female character in my video games most of the time too.
But imagine how much more critical they'd be about my doll hobby....

 

I've always loved dolls. When I was young my dad wouldn't allow my brother and I to even play with action figures because "Boys don't play with dolls." I don't have a BJD yet but I'm planning to get one. I do worry about what people will say but I'm an adult with my own money so who cares.

 

1-Did you grow up liking dolls or did you only recently start to like them when you learned of the BJDs?
I've always loved toys and stuffed animals. My family is sick to death of my obsession for stuffed animals.

2-Were/are you apprehensive about allowing people other than other BJD admirers see your dolls?
Yes!! My parents gave awful impressions, and my bestest best friend said when she first saw them 'You're too weird'. Broke my heart!!

3-In what ways do you try to deal with this?
I keep my dolls a secret from people unless they are coming to my house, and then I 'warn' them. I tell them I love 'collectables' and my hobby is dolls. When they say they are afraid of dolls I tell them they are special dolls and explain as much about them as possible to try and get them enrolled. I talk about the books Ive written and how I made dolls of the characters. Or I first talk about the dolls first and then mention that I have a few. I never talk about the prices with anyone but my mother, who hates the hobby. I literally asked her what she would approve of more, drugs or dolls and she could not give me a straight answer. I'm very lonely because of this. When a boy see's them he always thinks its cute and likes them. Its the women and adults that react negatively. You are a boy though, so I can see how that would be more difficult. Thats such a shame. Even if you were homosexual, the stereotype of boys disliking womans material is too strong. Its strange that boys can have action figures but as soon as these start being pose-able or change their clothes it becomes something immature or stereotypical.

 

1-Did you grow up liking dolls or did you only recently start to like them when you learned of the BJDs?
I didn't like normal dolls as a child, not Barbies or dolls like that. I did like china dolls and kokeshi dolls.

2-Were/are you apprehensive about allowing people other than other BJD admirers see your dolls?
Some times I am... it depends on who. I don't mind women seeing my collecting but I tend to not allow other guys to see my BJDs until I get to know them better. I know they won't understand it or won't get it. My family doesn't want anything to do with my hobbies.

3-In what ways do you try to deal with this?
I tend to deal with this by sticking to conventions and doll meets. And basically just keeping my dolls to my apartment or trips to the fabric store. Some times if I'm going to to dinner with doll friends we'll each bring one but that's about it. At conventions, I've noticed that women collectors don't get asked about their dolls, but I get asked constantly why I have them. :/

 

(girl here)
I grew up with Barbies and even got my mom to buy me an American Girl at some point...I've always loved dolls!

As far as showing them to other people, well I live in a tiny apartment right now and don't have people over. :P But I have no problem casually mentioning that I have a small doll collection. People probably imagine 2-3 vintage porcelain dolls rather than my cute BJDs, but that's not important.

The few people who've seen my dolls have just been like "Oh, huh. They're kinda cool." and then moved on.