Funny Conversations with Friends/Family

LOL, this thread is making me LOL so much XD,
[MENTION=57781]ChronicallySpaced[/MENTION] Hey one of the bjd's in my 'main wishlist' of 7 dolls is called Haiiro . It's not his birth name, but it's how he introduces himself and if anyone who knows called him his real name he would get incredibly angry!

I don't have many, but here's one I just remembered:

Me: *browsing the Dollshe website, as I'd never been on it before*
Me: *scrolls down*
Me: OMG THEIR PENISES ARE GIGANTIC!!!! (I'm used to a tiny thin bjd penis) *puts hand over screen*
Mum: gives me weird look
Me *scrolls back up and clicks on the link to the 44cm sizes dolls*
Me: AAHHHHH THE GIANT PENIS GUYS ARE STALKING ME!!! *puts hand in front of screen again*
Mum: *laugh* what happened??
Me: I clicked on the link to the 44cm dolls to see if they had any cool msd's and It's just the guys with the gigantic penises!
Mum: haha! Lol. *looks over*
Mum: o_0

 

I have another one. I had this conversation with a friend the day before (ps Apple watch has been released where I live):

friend/family: omg Apple watch yaaaas
me: omg dolls yaaaas

 

This isn't with family or friends, but everyone at the post office knows me so it's close enough!

I shipped off a couple face plates to their new owners yesterday, and when the clerk saw that (she read the description on the customs forms), well...

Clerk- Doll face plates this time?
Me- *grin and nod*
Clerk- *stares at parcel, then at me* Oh my God, Ashley, I'm going to have nightmares about faceless dolls. Thanks.
Me- *LAUGHING UPROARIOUSLY*

Then she goes for the second parcel-

Me- Okay, now this is the same thing, so take a deep breath-
Clerk- More nightmares!!!

I love my post office.

 

I live alone, and only occasionally bring a doll or two home for photos when I'm visiting my parents, though this is one that happened on a previous trip. I'd brought my Delf Shiwoo boy along for some outdoor photos, and when I was carrying him outside my stepmother (who also collects dolls, though OT Madame Alexander ones) noticed him.

Stepmom: Oh, she's really pretty!
Me: He, actually. No huge tracts of land.
Stepmom: Oh, I guess you're right!

The funny ones from my friends tend to be a little more "dirty" (no bad language, but definitely some naughty implications!), so I'm not sure if I can actually relate any of those here.

 

Okay, this literally just happened:

Me: Argh! I wish this peep would reply! I need to buy her fudging eyes!!
Mum: *whispers* That sounds soooo wrong.......

 

I was taking pictures of my kdf yesterday and my grandma pulls out her phone and says i can take better pictures of her! Lol

 

A fur doll wig from FunnyLori arrived, and my friend immediately picked it up. "Oh, I see my new beard is here." He stuck it on his face and stroked it in a distinguished manner while my other friends snickered. We agreed it was quite dashing.

 

Omg, I think I laughed a bit too hard on this one xDD

 

A few days after I got my Iplehouse Carina, my kid brother came over to visit. I had to show her off, because she was like, new, you know, and I pulled her out of the box and his remark was, " Ooooooh, NICE TITS!....Do you think she'd date me?"

 

These are great!

My mom still laughs at me, because when I was a newbie, I told her a needed a box for 'underwear and eyes'. MSD sized, of course

 

Neighbor/grandparents: "You don't like babies?"

Me: "I like to look at them, buy them things, take photos, but that's it. I'm not baby sitting, either. That's their responsibility."

Them: "You don't want to hold them?"

Me: "Nope."

Them:"...but don't you have dolls? A baby is like your dolls."

Me: "I pick my dolls up by their necks, and don't care too much if they fall."

-silence-

 

Plus, you never have to feed dolls, and dolls don't poop or smear food all over the place. I love kids, but they are MESSY.

This isn't really all that funny, but it is typical of the way my family kind of works around Dad's...quirks?

(after a discussion about whether a Pagan like me celebrates the holidays)
Mom: Well, then, is there anything you'd like for Christmas?
Me: Well, I've kinda fallen in love with these Alice in Wonderland dolls (the Pukifee steampunk card soldiers) *shows her a link*
Mom: Well, you know your dad isn't going to buy you dolls.

That evening, I get a text.
Mom: I was thinking about it, and Christmas is all about buying gifts for others that you wouldn't buy for yourself. Send me the link again.

I'm guessing this is another "don't tell your father" thing. I can't help wondering if my doll will arrive in time for Yule, and whether she ordered the pink-haired one or the black-haired one.

 

Me: they're anatomically correct.
Friend: So, you mean they have little bits?
Me: Yes...
Friend: so can they like, have sex with each other?
Me: NO STOP NO >_<

 

A manager at work and I were discussing expensive hobbies (he gets fancy watches, I get fancy dolls), and he got really intrigued by my most recent order of a FairyLand Sia Seahorse, so since it arrived this past week I showed him a photo on my phone.

Manager: "Oh wow, you got it? That's really cool. How much was it, again?"
Me: "$829."
Manager: "$829? That doll is as much as the exercise equipment I just got! I got it on Black Friday, regular price $1400, on sale for $749."
Me: "Technically, then, I paid more for this doll than your exercise equipment."
Manager: "Geez... do they do Black Friday sales?"
Me: "No.... Well, one company does, but I'm always broke for it. Otherwise, I'd probably be in trouble there."
Manager: "Yeah, I can only imagine."

 

They're not that anatomically correct, lol.

 

Yeah, I tried explaining that to her but I don't think she understands.

 

Dad walks in while I'm holding a naked moe line glamour bust minifee
Dad:...she has some big boobs
Me:...You should see the other one!

 

S-so my first doll was an RD Armand, and how it happened was: My grandmother, who was in China, asked me what I wanted as a gift because I got into my university of choice with a stellar GPA. And so she was like I'll get you ANYTHING, so I decided to ask her for a BJD

My first BJD of choice was going to be RD Don, but she sniffed around Guangzhou in the physical BJD shops and rung me up all excited.

Grandma: YOU WILL NOT BELIEVE WHAT I FOUND, I FOUND THE PERFECT DOLL FOR YOU
Me: ??? But Grandma, Ringdoll Don is good enough fo--
Grandma: NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND, THIS DOLL, he looks made for you. Wait until I send it to you, it's a surprise!

So I waited for several months for my baby to arrive, in pure agony. She didn't know how to ask for sculpts in Mandarin, and neither did I, so I trusted her judgement and by god when RD Armand arrived on my doorstep I almost cried.

Grandma knows my vampire gothic bishounen aesthetic so well 8'D

 

I've had some weird conversations about dolls, but this is my favorite. I linked my best friend to the page for Kid Delf Bory (girl) because I want one. She said "if that thing was in my house, I'd have to smash it with a hammer before I could sleep."

 

I recently left my doll at home so I wouldn't have the temptation of playing with her instead of studying for exams. My dad is noticeably creeped out by the doll, which I mainly just find funny. He came into my room after I had just finished packing her up in her box for safekeeping.

Dad: She's in there?
Me: Yup
Dad: *staring at the box, dead serious* Good. If I hear scratching in the middle of the night, I'll know where it's coming from. *proceeds to walk out of the room as though nothing happened*



I just remembered two other gems.

Right when I first got my doll, I sent by boyfriend a picture of her in an outfit I made her (she didn't have any eyes, hair, or faceup yet). He responded with "Awwwwww, she's horrifying. Remind me to never gauge my eyes out."

That same week, my grandparents were visiting for Thanksgiving. My mom was super excited about my doll (I love my mom), so she asked if she could show her to them. When my granddad saw her, he looked confused and muttered "I don't want to be rude, but she sort of looks like...a cancer patient." My granddad is a recently retired cancer doctor. I cracked up and told him she would look much better once she had some hair and a faceup.