Girls view on guys who own BJDs

There's no need to get hostile in this discussion.

I fully support LBGT rights and people, I have absolutely no problem with them at all and that wasn't the way I was wanting to come across.

I was just stating that my first impression is that I'm not used to seeing men with dolls. If a man wants to collect dolls, who am I to stop him- and I wouldn't even want to stop him in the first place. It's just the first thing that comes to my mind, and that would not stop me from getting to know who he is.

As for my creepy statement- it's based on types of dolls like these (nsfw) that are posed extremely sexually on other forums that I find creepy- and no, the owner doesn't have to be male. I have yet to see anyone on DoA like that, though.


YMMV.

 

Oh, no you didn't!

I imagine the only reason you feel it is getting hostile is because you are getting called out on your BS.
I am glad I was not the only one who had a reaction to it.

Edit: And sorry if I seem harsh or hostile!
I just wanted to add that of course you are free to have whatever reaction or impression you want of a guy with a BJD.
And if you share those thoughts I think the rest of us should be equally allowed to react to what you, or anyone else, writes here.
I am not trying to start a war. I am just very opinionated.

 

I really don't appreciate you cussing up a storm to me and it feels like I was personally attacked- it could have been a civil discussion. There is really no point in arguing, but I wanted to let you know you're coming off as a bit rude as well.

 

Guys who own bjds, or are interested them, seem totally normal to me. I have male friends that are interested in dolls and want their own but currently just coo over mine and another friend's because of gender stereotypes their parents have forced upon them. The older men in my family (father and uncle) think they're adorable and are genuinely interested in the dolls. I honestly don't think gender really matters with these dolls (this probably has been said before) because they're an outlet to express yourself and they allow you to create a 3D image of a particular character or just let you create something as fantastical as you want. Modern culture does 'frown' upon it but thats because gender roles have been ingrained into the majority of people from the moment they're born.

 

My first comment was to both you and Chriandra but you were the only one to respond.
I was not the only one who had a reaction to what both of you wrote though.
And is this really an argument? You said that seeing a guy with a doll makes you think he is gay and I, and others, think that is quite ridiculous. So far you have not even denied that.
Am I being rude about it? Yes, I admit to that. I might be coming on a bit strong too.
I am sorry for that! But I had a knee jerk reaction to comments that I thought was mind boggling silly.
Sexism and prejudice are pet peeves of mine you see, so I always react strongly when I see it.

 

This is a general discussion, not debate you guys, I really dont like the tension from this room. This is a forum and everyone is entitled to an opinion so cant we just respect that, no matter how silly it is, and move on? Really it ruins everything for the rest of us. No one needs to feel attacked just because they voiced their honest opinion. sexism and prejudice are pet peeves, but they are part of our society especially here in america where boys are raised with tools and girls are raised with barbies. I understand the rest of the world is different but we have to be understanding of each others cultural and personal differences even if you dont agree with them.

 

Sexism just like racism is something that should not just be shrugged away though, no matter where you are from.
And if she should be allowed to voice her thoughts so should I and anybody else.
She is not really being attacked. She said something I thought was sexist and prejudice and I told her what I thought about that. That is not an attack.
I am really sorry if I have ruined your fun! That was not my intention at all.
As you said this is not a debate thread, you are absolutely right about that, so I shall say no more.
If anyone would like to discuss further feel free to PM me.

 

I think its awesome...it shouldn't matter who you are. If you like something, you like it, and that's all there is to it. ;P

 

I think as long as they enjoy the hobby that's all that should matter!

 

I grew up with too many artistic and creative guys to think twice about it, actually. I look at dolls as a creative toy more than anything else, and I see no reason for girls to engage their creativity any more than guys. I'm actually glad to see the guys around; it brings a very refreshing bit of balance.

 

well, i never thought about it before but seeing guys who own dolls and taking good care of it is something interesting and it just emphasize that both sexes can have common interests. it can really bring out their creative side and give them a chance to express themselves just like us. but just for the record i never saw one before because of my eastern surroundings, the majority of guys in my country dont prefer anything related to arts let alone owning a doll. dolls are regarded as trifles in my country.
and as for the last tensed discussion about their orientation if they collect dolls, i don't think that anyone has this right to judge them this way. its just who they are. and they can own a doll and be a good person. it just remind me of a tough guy who loves cute things and i think this is cute.

 

I think it's cool..We all have a right to express ourselves and we shouldn't discriminate a person just because of their sexuality

 

I remember hearing from somwhere that in Japan almost most of the BJD owners are actually male. And honestly, when you look at the dolls and the way they are portraid at the companies pages (at least most of them), it is quite sexual. So what I was thinking is, that these dolls are meant as much for men as for women. Besides, why else would so many dolls have huge breasts, childs face and even nipples on them. In Japan this is considered very sexy.

And now to the question.
I find it also a bit strange for man to own such a doll. I have nothing against it, but I wouldn´t like my boyfriend playing with dollies. Don´t know why, just being honest. But in general each to its own. So men with dolls is fine. And why wouldn´t a man find these dollies interesting since they are very beautiful and can be seen as sexual as well.

 

I'm always surprised, but that passes quickly. Then it'd just feel normal, though I'd be curious in what his tastes are.

Overall, I'd be very excited to have a guy friend who liked dolls. ^^

 

I have respect for them.
It's amazing that they dare to buy a 'girl-thingie'. I love it that they do what they want even if the comments are negative.

 

Ugh, it is THOSE kinds of dolls that have lended to my slight disdain towards (some) male (and some female) doll collectors.

I despise both sexism and the sexual objectification of women with a burning passion and to see it occur so easily within the BJD hobby is a bit disturbing and upsetting to me. That many men (within Japan especially) collect such dolls sits...uneasily with me and I do resent them for it. If I met a man who had such a doll I would judge him, butnot as a man collecting dolls, but as a man who collects something so sexualised (and downright creepy/disgusting in my opinion.)

If I met a guy who collected, say, pretty much any other BJD then I'd be very cool with that

 

Well, my boyfriend loves BJDs and I can tell that he's almost 100% straight. He got 3, soon 4, dolls - all female with moderate breast size, they even wear normal clothes. I've also seen other guys who own female dolls and their girls weren't degraded as a sexual object. Sure, you can't tell that from every male BJD-lover but one must not forget that there are also "pervert females" (or how would you explain that there's so much BJD-Yaoi...).

After all I won't say it is strange for guys to collect dolls. Men and Women are equal. If I say, it is okay for an adult female to own dolls, I should also allow males to get into the hobby.

Playing with dolls doesn't make them gay or pervert, even if some people say such things...

 

It's definately something that society has constucted us to believe is wrong. Parents become afraid that letting their little boy play with girl's toys will make them a homosexual. When firstly, being homosexual isn't bad or wrong, and secondly, it's not as easy as a little boy playing with a doll.

That said, I'd love it if I met a guy who was into dolls. I don't have any doll friends irl so I guess any friend I could get would make me very happy.

 

Let's think of it this way, would you stop your daughter from playing with a hammer or screwdriver because it might bring out her manly side? Both sexes need some knowledge of the other's traditional role in the family. In this day and age men also need to take a major part in childrearing and I think taking care of dolls would be of great help.

 

Why not? BJDs are wonderful outlets of creativity and massive sources of artistic potential. I see no reason for guys to not be able to be artistic too. A lot of people complain about "doll owners/collectors" being stereotyped; the doll owners themselves should avoid stereotyping each other too. This is a hobby for everyone who's willing to invest the time and money into it.