Have's and Have-Not's?

Um...all that comes to mind on this subject is that for everything you have - doll related or otherwise - someone doesn't have it but wants it. That includes luxury items, sure, but it also includes necessities like food and good health. Sometimes you need to prioritize in your own mind the things that really matter. Your heart aches for the hungry? Give to charity. Someone you know has cancer? Walk for The Cure. Abandoned children haunt your dreams? Foster.

But doll accessories?? Come on. Those are a luxury item, and if someone can't afford/track down a piece that they love, then go ahead and empathize, because it's really a pity - but know that something equally nice will come along eventually. And let's face it - other people have luxury items that you want, and it won't kill you if you never manage to get your hands on them.

Yeah, sorry, I know it sounds preachy, but save this kind of worry for the things that really matter. Doll clothes. Yeesh. It's not as though you were intentionally waving them around and saying, "nya"!

 

I guess I'm kind of a brat then because I like pursuing rare outfits.
Not to flaunt them, but just to have them. I think that's mostly what keeps me interested in the hobby now is searching for rare items I like.
I haven't felt guilty about having them, but lucky!

 

1) How do you react when you see an outfit, accessory or doll you absolutely love and want to have? In your opinon, what are the rights and wrongs when reacting to someone else's BJD-related possessions?

If I see something else I love, I have no qualms about asking where it's from. Even if it's a limited item, or not available anymore, sometimes just knowing the company helps in case they have similar items. If not, well, that's why WTB in the second-hand market exists.

As far as rights or wrongs go, there's nothing wrong with feeling envious, but it's really silly to resent someone over a possession regardless of the way they obtained it.

2) Have you ever resented someone personally for their BJD-related possessions? In your opinion, is it possible for people to resent someone personally for the items they have?

For myself, no and no.

3) Is elitism a myth or a reality of the hobby? Is the concept of "elitism" created by the "Have's" or the "Have-Not's" or a combination of both and does it extend to everyone or a few people in the hobby?

There is some elitism, but much of it is perceived by the imagination. I've been called a Volks elitist simply because I own a Volks LE. My favourite doll is my cheapest doll, a Kid Delf, so make your judgements...

4) Does the hobby itself even have "Have's" and "Have-Nots"? Or is it a matter of being happy with what one has versus what one wishes he/she had?

Yes, people should just be happy with what they have. Sorry if I sound obnoxious, but I am super patient if I want something, and unless it's been a OOAK item, I've been able to find what I want, even if it takes a few months.

 

1) How do you react when you see an outfit, accessory or doll you absolutely love and want to have? In your opinon, what are the rights and wrongs when reacting to someone else's BJD-related possessions?
I admire it and wonder if I could acquire it myself. If I'm interested enough, I'll ask an owner where they acquired the item. Hmmmm. I don't really find myself doing this much though. If it's a doll, then I usually put my questions forward directly to the company. If it's an outfit or accessory and the owner doesn't list where they got it (or if they made it, etc), then I would politely ask them. I'm not often inquisitive enough about that kind of thing: but, I will say that I more often ask owners about hybriding and resin matching. Of all the times I have asked about such things, only one person was ever utterly patronizing to me. I try to be as kind and helpful as possible to anyone who inquires about my dolls.

2) Have you ever resented someone personally for their BJD-related possessions? In your opinion, is it possible for people to resent someone personally for the items they have?
No, I have not. I just can't put negative energy toward people in that way. I feel like this is my hobby and if I'm taking it so seriously that I can actually drum up feelings of bitterness toward people, then it's no longer fun. I have definitely loved seeing all the wonderful dolls I can't acquire, but it's not resentment I feel, nor pangs of jealousy. I just take it that some dolls are not meant to be with me and they have perfectly lovely owners out there. XD

It is possible to feel resentment in this hobby, but I think that could be said of a lot of kinds of hobbies. However, I don't know if such a feeling would solely be stemming from envy over someone else's possessions. I think that it's a good thing to re-examine where you're at in your life and what the real root of the issue is.

3) Is elitism a myth or a reality of the hobby? Is the concept of "elitism" created by the "Have's" or the "Have-Not's" or a combination of both and does it extend to everyone or a few people in the hobby?
Sure, there is elitism. That kind of social cleavage can be seen anywhere you look, not just in a hobby. Take it with a grain of salt and move forward--people who are going to be rude just because of your dolls are not worth your time.

4) Does the hobby itself even have "Have's" and "Have-Nots"? Or is it a matter of being happy with what one has versus what one wishes he/she had?
Hmmm. I think in some ways, you can be happy with what you have, and if you're not, you can make changes in your life to have what you want. I started out in this hobby around 8 years ago and I was in my early years at college: saving was torture! So, I've saved money over years from working to acquire the dream dolls I wanted. It's hard and I won't deny that. If you set certain goals, you can work toward achieving them.

 

1) How do you react when you see an outfit, accessory or doll you absolutely love and want to have? In your opinon, what are the rights and wrongs when reacting to someone else's BJD-related possessions?

Umm, right reaction: *Drool* "Want, want, want!" *save all pictures into special "Inspiration" folder on desktop *start saving/purchasing/making said item*

Wrong reaction: "MUST. HAVE." *pull out voodoo doll, make to look like OP, start stabbing in vital spots* *google map their location and hunt them down like an animal* *steal all earthly BJD possessions, kick their pet/SO for good measure*


2) Have you ever resented someone personally for their BJD-related possessions? In your opinion, is it possible for people to resent someone personally for the items they have?

No, I don't resent people for being able to purchase things, even if they were born with the whole drawer of silver in their mouth. SOMEONE had to work for that item's purchase, and I will have to work for it too.


3) Is elitism a myth or a reality of the hobby? Is the concept of "elitism" created by the "Have's" or the "Have-Not's" or a combination of both and does it extend to everyone or a few people in the hobby?

I don't know what you define elitism as, but the dictionary describes it as:

1. practice of or belief in rule by an elite.

2.consciousness of or pride in belonging to a select or favored group.

Going off of that definition, I feel the first definer is inapplicable to doll collecting because we are all from different walks of life, professions, races, religions and countries and therefore there can not be an "Elite" trait that is a predominant practice or belief (besides the obvious feeling of "OMG, I LOVE DOLLS). Now, I do see some people on DOA or other doll collecting sites who "Only Buy _______". It's not always a issue of quality, usually it is a love of sculpt and rarely it is a preference of country (won't buy Korean, or Chinese or Japan etc) because of the countries work condition standards, cultural aggressions or some other perceived slight. I don't see that as elitist, just a personal preference, like finding boys with dark hair cute, or only liking Nike's as shoes. If they were rubbing either choice in another persons face as being better, I would see that as elitism. But just posting "OMG SQUEE I LOVE THE NEW THING I GOT FOR MY BJD!!" is not in any way a form of elitism, just expressing joy.



4) Does the hobby itself even have "Have's" and "Have-Nots"? Or is it a matter of being happy with what one has versus what one wishes he/she had?

A little of both really. But the imbalance is easily fixed through prudent saving and waiting, and every once in a while a matter of a financial windfall. Of course, it's usually hard to tell that to the younger (or younger minded) collectors that. Heck, my DAD would max out his cards for a drum set he liked instead of waiting a few paychecks. It all depends on the persons maturity level.




Good questions by the way, you really made me think!!

 

1) How do you react when you see an outfit, accessory or doll you absolutely love and want to have? In your opinon, what are the rights and wrongs when reacting to someone else's BJD-related possessions?

If I see something I have to have, I go try to find it! If I can't find it immediately, I save it in my ebay search and keep an eye out on doa for someone selling it. I have seen that some bjd owners do not like it when someone "copies" them. I, personally, think mimicry is the highest form of flattery.
I think it is wrong to be jealous (negative reaction) to what someone else has. I think it is right to be inspired by what someone else has, and to want to work/save to achieve that item.


2) Have you ever resented someone personally for their BJD-related possessions? In your opinion, is it possible for people to resent someone personally for the items they have?

Absolutely not. Resenting others for what they have is self-destructive, and just plain silly.

3) Is elitism a myth or a reality of the hobby? Is the concept of "elitism" created by the "Have's" or the "Have-Not's" or a combination of both and does it extend to everyone or a few people in the hobby?

Elitism? Who cares? Our everyday lives are filled with people who have no clue what bjd's are. In what way do we really have to deal with elitism?
If I encounter elitism, it would be here, on doa, and I would simply stop reading, and head for a more interesting thread!

4) Does the hobby itself even have "Have's" and "Have-Nots"? Or is it a matter of being happy with what one has versus what one wishes he/she had?

I think collecting bjd's is a very personal hobby. I believe most bjd owners are happy with what they have, or happy with what they want and will be getting as soon as they can afford it. In my personal experience, the bjd-ers I have met are thrilled with their own dolls, and if they are interested in someone else's doll, it's not because they are unhappy with what they have, or because they are resentful of what they don't have. They might feel inspired to find that sculpt for themselves, and will be motivated to save for it, but not resentful because they don't already have it.

 

1) How do you react when you see an outfit, accessory or doll you absolutely love and want to have? In your opinon, what are the rights and wrongs when reacting to someone else's BJD-related possessions?

I'd like to know where they get their items. I like to know, that's all. 90% of the time I don't usually end up buying them even though I might LOVE and would WANT to have those items. I don't know what would be the 'rights and wrongs' in reacting to someone else's BJD-related possessions. Some people could be sensitive to that sort of thing, but to me it's not really a big deal. BJD-related possessions or day-to-day possessions (DVDs, jewellery, socks, silverware, I don't know, anything), someone would have to manufacture them and someone would buy and someone would tell another friend where they got it from. It's sharing.

2) Have you ever resented someone personally for their BJD-related possessions? In your opinion, is it possible for people to resent someone personally for the items they have?

No, not really. Sorry but I think it's a little juvenile to feel that way. But it's pretty normal to have those feelings. Peers envy one another all the time for all the branded things they could buy. Other people may not be interested in these hence they don't care as much but why covet? I don't know, I just don't see the point. They're just 'things'.


3) Is elitism a myth or a reality of the hobby? Is the concept of "elitism" created by the "Have's" or the "Have-Not's" or a combination of both and does it extend to everyone or a few people in the hobby?

Elitism exists everywhere. In any case, people who does things best within their own circle and garner a lot of attention are bound to attract envious eyes and hearts. It's easy for something like that to arise in a community where people could be modest or extravagant in their collections or lifestyles. It's not exclusive to this hobby, but I can see how it can happen.


4) Does the hobby itself even have "Have's" and "Have-Nots"? Or is it a matter of being happy with what one has versus what one wishes he/she had?

I have a lot of things I wish I have had. But eventually I got over these 'wants' because what's a dress or two, or some posh accessories or three or four or five? They're only good for a few photoshoots and that's it. I do buy a lot of junk which are never used ever again, and I'm getting frustrated by the fact that I do not have room and space for my hobby. I guess it's like I wish I'd have all the literary masterpieces on my bookshelves but realistically and feasibly, I can't really. So it's best that at least I have read some of these works and understand them rather than HAVE them for display purposes while my brain rots and my pride is getting pumped. My enjoyment and being happy is derived from how much I know about the dollying hobby and what I can do with this hobby in my spare time.

 

1) How do you react when you see an outfit, accessory or doll you absolutely love and want to have? In your opinon, what are the rights and wrongs when reacting to someone else's BJD-related possessions?
I figure out what it is, and where I can get it. I'm not sure if there are rights and wrongs. Depends on the individual.

2) Have you ever resented someone personally for their BJD-related possessions? In your opinion, is it possible for people to resent someone personally for the items they have?
No. I do however, wish I had more talent and creativity to come up with some of the ideas other people have.

3) Is elitism a myth or a reality of the hobby? Is the concept of "elitism" created by the "Have's" or the "Have-Not's" or a combination of both and does it extend to everyone or a few people in the hobby?
It exists in any hobby, especially an expensive one.

4) Does the hobby itself even have "Have's" and "Have-Nots"? Or is it a matter of being happy with what one has versus what one wishes he/she had?
I agree with a previous poster that everyone here with a doll is a have. However, some people can afford more to go with that doll than others, and because of that there might be some resentment or jealousy.

 

1) How do you react when you see an outfit, accessory or doll you absolutely love and want to have? In your opinon, what are the rights and wrongs when reacting to someone else's BJD-related possessions?

I first check to see if it can be bought, and if it can I start to plan saving and so on and so forth. However, if it isn't, I chalk it down to 'If I Won The Lottery' and move on. There's no point moping over something you're never going to get, right? As to 'rights' and 'wrongs', enquiring politely about its availibility is fine, as is dropping a //very// polite and non-pressuring note saying if the owner ever felt like selling, please remember me first or something. But outright asking to buy it from them is rude, I think. A certain level of respect and 'Oh well, lucky her/him!' is needed in this hobby, I think.



2) Have you ever resented someone personally for their BJD-related possessions? In your opinion, is it possible for people to resent someone personally for the items they have?

Resented... No. But I'll admit I've been jealous of people before XD! But it's never changed how I act towards them, or how I like them / their doll as a person / doll. I think resentment is a bit strong, a bit too bitter for me. A certain level of envy and / or jealousy is only to be expected, but I think resenting someone for that is a bit awkward to think of, and a bit upsetting! I certainly wouldn't want to be resented for something I had!


3) Is elitism a myth or a reality of the hobby? Is the concept of "elitism" created by the "Have's" or the "Have-Not's" or a combination of both and does it extend to everyone or a few people in the hobby?

I keep hearing about this elitism, but I've never seen it IRL, applied to either my dolls or anyone elses. I have AoDs, for example, and a Soom tiny. To me it's not 'how much', but 'how much do I love it', and I think it would be ideal if other people were able to think like that too xD. Personally, I'm not too keen on Bobobies. IMVHO, I don't like the wrists and for me, there's something lacking in the faces. But it's similar with Volks. I'm not too keen on those either xD. So, I don't consider myself a dollie snob, and I certainly wouldn't be rude to anyone who had a doll I wasn't fond of!


4) Does the hobby itself even have "Have's" and "Have-Nots"? Or is it a matter of being happy with what one has versus what one wishes he/she had?

I think a healthy level of envy is fine. After all, we're all human xD! But I think it's also important to be proud and happy with what you have, while striving for it to be better in your eyes! Whether it's the size of your collection, your sewing skills or your faceups, it's better to always try to improve yourself, while looking up to other's work! Besides, if it's a peice of clothing you love, you could always do your best to recreate it yourself. Of course, it wouldn't be 100% like the original, but aslong as you didn't try to sell it as one, it should be fine. :3

 

1) How do you react when you see an outfit, accessory or doll you absolutely love and want to have? In your opinon, what are the rights and wrongs when reacting to someone else's BJD-related possessions?
I might ask where they got it, on the off-hand chance I can track it down personally. However, I very rarely do this. I try to find info on it myself, usually.

2) Have you ever resented someone personally for their BJD-related possessions? In your opinion, is it possible for people to resent someone personally for the items they have?
It's possible. I've done it on a very mild level before, and never for very long. Scalpers sometimes anger me, but legitimate buyers don't. Even if someone has one of my grail dolls, I don't want THEIR (Williams or Hijikata ), I want MINE.

3) Is elitism a myth or a reality of the hobby? Is the concept of "elitism" created by the "Have's" or the "Have-Not's" or a combination of both and does it extend to everyone or a few people in the hobby?
I think the word elitist got dragged in from mainstream culture and is similarly misused. There are some company snobs and just general snobs around, I'm sure, but it's not nearly as widespread as the people complaining about it seem to be .

4) Does the hobby itself even have "Have's" and "Have-Nots"? Or is it a matter of being happy with what one has versus what one wishes he/she had?
I'm not sure that it does have those two categories. I find myself happy for and really admiring the luck of people who have something I wish I could have gotten, say at a Dolpa. I always enter for One-Offs and never win, for example, but when I see the person who did squeeing their way over to claim the doll, I feel really happy for them. I wouldn't want to think that everyone was glaring at me if I were the lucky one. It's not that person's fault for wanting something awesome!

I have experienced a bit of that guilt for things I've bought limited, like a Leeke wig, that more than one person has asked where they could get one. It doesn't feel good to tell them that it's no longer available. However, very few things in this hobby are impossible to find for the truly persistent.

 

1) How do you react when you see an outfit, accessory or doll you absolutely love and want to have? In your opinon, what are the rights and wrongs when reacting to someone else's BJD-related possessions?

I don't think there are any rules, except to not be rude. If the brand of doll or outfit isn't noted on the photo, I might ask the owner politely about it, but that's about all. If I really plan to try to buy an item like it, I research the availability on my own.

2) Have you ever resented someone personally for their BJD-related possessions? In your opinion, is it possible for people to resent someone personally for the items they have?

No. It is possible to resent someone for their possessions, but that seems quite childish to me and a complete waste of time and energy. I am not a jealous person.

3) Is elitism a myth or a reality of the hobby? Is the concept of "elitism" created by the "Have's" or the "Have-Not's" or a combination of both and does it extend to everyone or a few people in the hobby?

I don't think eliteism is a myth because I personally know a few people in my town who are a little haughty about their preferred brand of dolls, but most people are not like that. The people I know who are like that just seem to need to be a bit better than other people and that need doesn't stop at just dolls. The vast majority of people I've met in the hobby are perfectly nice and polite whatever their taste in dolls.

4) Does the hobby itself even have "Have's" and "Have-Nots"? Or is it a matter of being happy with what one has versus what one wishes he/she had?

This hobby attracts a wide variety of people with varied income and ages, so naturally some people have deep pockets to buy whatever they wish and other people have to save money for a long time to buy a doll. I don't worry about what other people have because it has nothing to do with my situation. I like looking at other people's dolls online because in real life I would never get to see them. I don't feel guilty for anything I have and I don't feel jealous of anything other people have.

 

Elsphnt, I know how you feel. When a non-doll person enquires about how to get a Unoa when I show them mine(even though they're NOT a rare doll) I feel bad when I have to explain the schedule to them. Normally I just direct them to the Unoa faq thread. I have a wedding ring that, while not heavily embellished, it is quite different than most and it's a bit flustering when others make such a fuss over it. I don't feel guilty for owning the things I do, I just wish other people wouldn't make such a big deal over it. I buy things that make me happy.

 

I don't understand this at all, unless the person messaging was trying to push your guilt buttons by telling you that they had no money or couldn't ever get a wonderful outfit like that. >_< In which case I'd say they were being a jerk and for you not to fall for it. But if they were just admiring the outfit then there's nothing for you to feel guilty about. They can easily post a WTB in the marketplace, go hunting the outfit down on Y!J, plan to go to the next Dolpa, commission something similar...really, a lot of options there. If someone asking you a simple question pushes your guilt buttons I'd say you need to look inside at why you're having that reaction because it's really your own hangup and it's just going to get in the way of your personal enjoyment of the hobby.

1) How do you react when you see an outfit, accessory or doll you absolutely love and want to have? In your opinon, what are the rights and wrongs when reacting to someone else's BJD-related possessions?

If I want it then I buy it. If it's not available I'll look on the secondary market, look into having something customized or commissioned to be similar, or simply wait until the person decides to put it up for sale. I've gotten several OOAK dolls I really wanted because their owners after a couple years decided to part with them - it's just a matter of being patient and waiting

The "don'ts" in my mind include messaging someone begging them to sell something when it's not really for sale, or trying to "guilt" someone in any way - "you have so many pretty things, I have none, sell it to me". That's complete BS and I would never do that to anyone. If I did I'd expect them to tell me to get lost

2) Have you ever resented someone personally for their BJD-related possessions?

No. Resentment is stupid. It doesn't help you get the item or whatever it is you want. You need to put all that energy towards a plan for getting what you want!

In your opinion, is it possible for people to resent someone personally for the items they have?

It's possible but it's a huge waste of time and energy and is unproductive. Focus on a plan for YOU to get what YOU want, not on hating someone else. This applies to everything, not just dolls.

3) Is elitism a myth or a reality of the hobby? Is the concept of "elitism" created by the "Have's" or the "Have-Not's" or a combination of both and does it extend to everyone or a few people in the hobby?

Elitism, whether it's acting "elite" oneself or being mad at others for supposedly acting "elite", is a tired, overdone concept that I think appeals to people who are mentally twelve years old. Everybody needs to get over it like, yesterday.

4) Does the hobby itself even have "Have's" and "Have-Nots"? Or is it a matter of being happy with what one has versus what one wishes he/she had?

Any hobby or walk of life is going to have people who have more money or who were lucky enough to get a break where someone else didn't (like a lottery win, or getting an order through for a limited item). Again, if you want something, there are ways to get it or a reasonable facsimile of it. If you look at acquiring hard-to-find things as part of the fun of the hobby, then it will be a really great day when after all your patience you finally find that limited Dolpa item up for sale and pounce on it If it's just a matter of someone wanting everything that they can't have, then it might be best to adjust one's personal expectations so they don't interfere with one's day to day enjoyment, or perhaps plan for getting things down the road, like study for some career that might make enough money to purchase wonderful limited dolls, that sort of thing.

Really, it's a hobby and when the acquiring and wanting parts stop being fun and start feeling bad, it's time to take a step back and ask yourself what's going on inside you. Feeling resentful because you "don't have" or guilty because you "do have" are not productive and frankly, the person feeling all like a guilty martyr is just as screwy as the person who feels all envious, in my opinion.

 

How do you react when you see an outfit, accessory or doll you absolutely love and want to have? In your opinon, what are the rights and wrongs when reacting to someone else's BJD-related possessions?

If I see the outfit or item on someone else's doll, I would ask where they got it from, if it was limited, did they make it, etc. Usually people are happy to talk about their dolls when you're admiring.

As far as right and wrong behavior. I think it's fine to compliment items and ask about them, but I think it's strange when the line is crossed into statements like "Oh, I hate you for having this" or "Don't you want to give this to me?" Even in a joking way, it's impolite. I also think disparaging comments about amounts spent on dolls and owner privalges are rude.

Have you ever resented someone personally for their BJD-related possessions? In your opinion, is it possible for people to resent someone personally for the items they have?

I have not, but there are always people who will be jealous of others for what they have. I would say I've felt envious of people who have a lot of talent on the sewing and modding end as it's nice to be able to make things all on your own, but that's what practice is for.

Is elitism a myth or a reality of the hobby? Is the concept of "elitism" created by the "Have's" or the "Have-Not's" or a combination of both and does it extend to everyone or a few people in the hobby?

It's not a myth but it's up to you whether or not to buy into it.

Does the hobby itself even have "Have's" and "Have-Nots"? Or is it a matter of being happy with what one has versus what one wishes he/she had?

This is a perspective thing. If you focus on enjoying what you have rather than focusing on what you don't, you probably won't have to deal with this.

 

"Elitism" = Red herring, dead horse, Palin-electorate-speek. Move on.

"Haves vs Have-Nots" = This hobby is so farking expensive & rarefied, EVERYBODY here is a Have. End of story. You just can't take class-resentment seriously when it comes from somebody who owns a $200 toy.

If somebody else's doll has something really exquisite that I admire, the first thing I do is admire it! Luckily, our Gallery threads are intended for just this kind of effusiveness. (When something hits my buttons, my adjective-centers seriously get the runs.) If the item is something that I actually want/need/seek for my own dolls, I'll ask the owner where it came from. I don't care how hard the item is to get, or if it's even obtainable, I just want to know-- that is to say, my shopping-problems are not in the owner's jurisdiction.

But I've been on the receiving-end of those kind of emails & PMs many times too. I know what elphsnt means about having to tell somebody that Items A, B, C, D and E all came from limited/one-off/handmade sources, and thus aren't easy to come by.... it can feel awkward!... if only because such a list so clearly shows what an obsessive shopper I can be. ^^ But I don't feel guilty about it. If the query wasn't written in an aggressive manner, I see no reason to plainly share my shopping information.

If the query WAS written in an aggressive manner (which hasn't happened to me yet), I would ignore it. Really, calling someone a hoarder because they have more than you, or saying someone will go to Hell for not selling all her dolls at discount prices, or calling someone an elitist because they went shopping just at the right time? Personally resenting somebody you don't even know, based on possessions? Pfft. Not worth the two clicks it takes to "Delete This Message".

Guilt is a tremendous waste of time. When you look back on life from your deathbed, you don't say "Gee, I wish I had spent more time worrying about what other people think".

 

1) How do you react when you see an outfit, accessory or doll you absolutely love and want to have? In your opinon, what are the rights and wrongs when reacting to someone else's BJD-related possessions?

I think this is pretty common sense behavior and applies to anything anyone else may own that you are interested in. Complement the item, ask them politely if they know/remember who made it, and ask if there is a website or storefront for the maker. Never pressure the owner to give you information he/she clearly doesn't know or you can easily find yourself. Don't linger on it too long in a conversation or else things get awkward and you look creepy! Again, very basic social rules.

4) Does the hobby itself even have "Have's" and "Have-Nots"? Or is it a matter of being happy with what one has versus what one wishes he/she had?

Again, this can apply to economic situations as a whole. There will always be people who have more than you because of the money they make and how they spend it. Specifically for this hobby, a lot of things are very expensive and may mean many people can't get the things they want. However, since it is a very creative hobby, there is plenty of opportunity to make what you want and have fun doing it!

 

Every hobby has an elitist element, let them get on with it. I am thrilled to have my dolls and consider my self lucky to be able afford them.
I am an artist and do all my sewing, painting and so on. I am lucky to be able to do this many can't and I have had people complement me and that is lovely. I haven't had any negative stuff happen to me but it must be extremely upsetting.

It is a waste of your time to resent or envy others, it damages you, why waste all those precious moments on negative stuff?
I admire the dolls/houses/lifestyles etc etc..that other people have and may experience a twinge or two when its something I would love, but aching and railing about it does nothing to aquire it and only makes me sad.

As someone who has suffered from serious depression I try to live each day as it comes and envy is sooooo destructive, been there, done that, decided not to bother again...

If people are unpleasant to you about your posessions then that is their problem not yours. Most of us BJD-ers work hard for our dolls. You shouldn't feel bad because you were able to get something you wanted that is now not available.You did not do it on purpose to be mean!

I have skills others don't have and vice versa so I guess that is a have and a have not.
I may have dolls that others want and can't have/get (unlikely) I feel selfish and spoiled when I think what my dolls are worth when they are a luxury in a world where some people don't have the basics of life, however they have got/get me through some horrendous personal times with my depression and are better than taking drugs for it. Everything is a balance ansd sometimes it wobbles, we just have to try to keep our balance!

 

1) How do you react when you see an outfit, accessory or doll you absolutely love and want to have? In your opinon, what are the rights and wrongs when reacting to someone else's BJD-related possessions?

I am very lucky that I have some sewing experience. I'm by no means a wonderful seamstress but I can sew fairly well. So when I see an outfit I absolutely love generally I think about how I can recreate the outfit. Accessories, I do the same thing.
Dols are a bit trickier. I generally analyze the cost vs size vs company vs cost compared to other dolls. Heck, I know of two dolls I love, and adore and I want more than anything, however after analysis I have come to a resignation about them.

The right and wrong way of reacting to other peoples possessions is never an issue really. They have what they have and I have what I have. They both reflect our different life circumstances, styles and experiences. Should they have something I like/want I don't feel anything against them, or covet for it.

2) Have you ever resented someone personally for their BJD-related possessions? In your opinion, is it possible for people to resent someone personally for the items they have?

No. I have not. Sometimes I envy a persons skills in sewing and sculpting, but I don't ever resent them for it. It's their talent, and they're lucky to have it.

It's very possible, people have resented each other for lesser things than possessions.


3) Is elitism a myth or a reality of the hobby? Is the concept of "elitism" created by the "Have's" or the "Have-Not's" or a combination of both and does it extend to everyone or a few people in the hobby?

It's a reality, but not one that's seen on DoA (thankfully). I don't see it as being created by "Haves" vs "Have Not's" but from other elements of elitism within the hobby.

4) Does the hobby itself even have "Have's" and "Have-Nots"? Or is it a matter of being happy with what one has versus what one wishes he/she had?

It depends on your perspective really. Do you mean this in terms of money or over all contentment and happiness?

All hobbies have "Have's" and "Have-Nots" in terms of funds, every single one. I don't think the reality that there are those with more of a disposable income can be changed by how happy someone is with what they have. My contentment with my small bank account does not nullify that I am poor. It lets me lead a happy life. Personally the fact that I have two to three dolls makes me feel like a 'have's'. Anyone in any hobby has some disposable income they're able to throw at it. However with that as a basis there are people in hobbies who have more of a disposable income than others.

It is however, a matter of being happy with what you have. You may be able to buy everything doll related you want (and be a 'Have's" ) and still not be happy. You could have one doll, a wardrobe of sock dresses and be the happiest hobbyist in the world. It's all in perspective.