How do you combine collecting with.....

There is an old saying about if you un-string a bow [as with arrows] when not in use, it will remain more accurate. I wouldn't know about that, but it applies to life. Taking time with a hobby like BJDs is a great way to get "unstrung" -- and return to the other parts of your life revived. Newbie love has a wide range OF INTENSITY I'm sure, but the newness is just a special time, for any thing in life.

I know I am in the famous "honeymoon" stage. It is delightful to be in love, even if it is a hobby. And a new love that is not being unfaithful in any way to humans in your life is a great thing. Honeymoon love of anything actually does change our chemistry for a while. [Good reason to take time in human relationships, until that "stupid" stage passes.] About 2 or 3 months usually before your IQ and reasoning, or concentration returns to normal.

With a doll, it is in the "don't sweat the small stuff" category, if you should make purchases that have to be un-done. The market place here is a lively place from what I can tell. I hope to not lose money on a doll purchase if I have to allow one of mine to move to a new home through a sale. But if I do, I figure it covers my eating out, vacations, new clothes, and all the other things I don't get for myself -- budget. Plus, I know from experience if a person drives too hard with no genuine relaxing, the cost will be pretty sure to show up in health problems of a serious and also quite expensive way.

I am not going to expect other people to be able to give me approval for what I choose to do here. I can give them space to be shocked. A hard learned lesson for a confirmed people pleaser like me! They can't know all the details of my life. I am not better than, or less than them. Just, in MOST cases, hah! -- I am very different. I think God loves variety as much as I do. [Have you ever looked at all the species of monkeys there are? He has a sense of humor too, I'd say.]

I believe women especially tend to feel guilty for doing anything that is just for them, generally. And I would expect that the male collectors have their own challenges and stories.

I've never had the courage in any area to say anything like this, but when people might ask how much I pay for a doll, I think a suitable answer might be "Why? Do you want to pay for the next one I buy?" Or just a simpler, less smarty-pants, Why do you want to know? OR why do you need to know that? Not harsh, but also not apologetic. And change the subject.

 

I know what you're talking about. I can say that when I started in the hobby, it sucked up my life simply because there's so much to go through and I'm a thorough person. I didn't want to buy just any doll and I didn't want to get my doll and not even know how to take care of him or have him without clothes, a wig, etc. So, I think that's just how it is for you right now. Eventually, once you've processed all the information you need to feel comfortable, it'll die down and you'll find a balance. Or, at the very least, that's how it was for me. I mean, I was a MESS at the beginning and did spend more time hanging out on DoA than I felt was necessary and I will freely admit I once blew off a couple things just to do more research.

Now I balance it with everything and can go without. It's my main hobby right now, though, so it does occupy my mind way more than people probably think it should but I can control it and I don't obsess NEARLY as much. Though, if I have an incoming doll, I will get a little more into things than usual but, then again, I have learned when it's okay to indulge in my hobby and when not to. I don't let it get in the way of things anymore and that should, hopefully, happen for you too!

 

I've gotten pretty caught up in the hobby myself. I'm still new to it all, so I'm still feeling as fresh and slightly frenzied. However, I haven't allowed it to take over my entire life. I'm too busy at work to worry about dolls and hang out here. Only once I've clocked out, gone home and done what I need to do do I worry about my dolls if I'm in the mood. Sometimes I don't do anything, other times I'm messing with him constantly--especially if I've gotten him new things like eyes, clothes, or boots.

 

I don't understand time being an issue. Money, sure. These babies are expensive! But I don't think doll-collecting is time consuming at all. Honestly I'd rather be looking at BJDs than talking with my coworkers at break time! My only real issue is needing to pay for all the dolls I've charged to a card before buying more.

 

In the first period I really spent a lot of time on this hobby and I neglected friends, family and study. Besides being in "honeymoon" like others said, it was also a bad period in my life and BJDs helped me a lot in that time. Now that everything is back to normal again, I have so many things to do and in my mind that BJD only take little time, or better the time I feel I can give them, cause they're still very important to me and I really enjoy them

At work I can browse DOA as long as my work is done, so no stress at all. I feel really good now that I've balanced hobby and life.

So don't be afraid, you'll manage it too

 

I think it's easy to get carried away with any hobby, especially when you're new to it. There have been times when I've been really stressed at work and the only thing that's got me through the day is the thought of spending time with my dolls when I got home or spending time on forums. I would spend entire days thinking about the pictures I was going to take or the clothes I was going to buy so I didn't have to think about how stressed work was making me. Sometimes I got a bit obsessive and I could feel that the dolls were taking over, but I think as long as you realise what is happening and can take a step back from it all, then no harm done!!