How to have more fun with my BJD?

I think the previous aswers in this thread are still good advice.
Interact with our doll in your own ways and at your own pace.
Don't be too scared of messing up, one of the strongest points for polyurethane as a doll material is how durable and resilient it is. And even if something should go wrong, most things are fixable.

When I was new I found a lot of comfort in watching doll restorations. It reassured me that there wasn't much that could happen just by regular handeling that would require anything that exreme.

 

I really appreciate this thread - thanks op for starting it! I've been struggling a bit lately with mine and I think these are all really good suggestions. I second the idea of starting an Instagram to post photos and follow other people with BJDs - seeing them interact with theirs can be inspiring. Hope it goes well for you! Let's improve! ᕙ⁠(⁠＠⁠°⁠▽⁠°⁠＠⁠)⁠ᕗ

 

Thank you ! Maybe it’s that I don’t know what I should do? Lol. Thank you!!!!

 

Sewing for them, or making Pinterest boards based on their aesthetic/life style. I used to making TikTok’s of them.

 

You can do whatever you want, even if it's just admiring them. When I was new, I was very self-conscious about not being a good dolly-mom because I didn't do many things with them, but after 11 years I've found I don't compare myself anymore.
I have fun just taking them out and posing them next to me while I do other things around the house, but I also enjoy writing stories about them (my main outlet for dolly creativity), taking pictures and uploading them to my dolly IG, changing their clothes or sewing them new ones, drawing them (even though my drawing skills are poor to say the least xD)...

 

For me writing a photo story around them, sewing up the outfits for the story, taking their pictures, sometimes redoing or touching up their faceups and posting the story, are all part of the things I do with them.

I also like to have a couple of the smaller msd ones sit on my desk while I am watching stuff, they have popcorn and slushies to join me on a binge watching fest, while they share a doll papasan chair and relax.

My tiny little Lara joins the whole family on game night. If we need a fourth person she has her own little table and chair and we take turns for her.

My Smart Doll (off topic) goes on family vacations with us. I toss her in a doll backpack and take her along and then take pictures of her, She has her own pajamas sleeping bag, and swimsuit. I like to bring her because she is lightweight, but if I didn't have her I would pick one of the other ones to to come along.

Sometimes I'll just bring them along when I am going someplace as well. I'll just take pictures of them on an outing. People might glance when I am taking pictures of a doll in public, but no one has ever said anything to me.

 

One way I’ve managed to handle my fear is having items specifically for going out, a wig that isn’t at risk of tangling or getting messy, hands in a pose that will make it less likely for any fingers to break, clothes that cover more skin to avoid possible scuffs in case of an accident, I also like really like taking my dolls out in a pet backpack or hard shell doll case!

 

Mine have a private movie theater all of their own. I bought an old VCR and and started collecting VHS tapes from thrift stores (as well as backup VCRs in case one starts to eat tapes) to play on the TV upstairs in front of where my girls stay. Every time I'm going by I swap out the tape. I close my eyes and tell them to guide my hands to the one they feel like watching next. They have favorites and sometimes want to watch the same one several times in a row and sometimes I join them if I'm not busy with something else. Video tapes have a very strange visual quality compared to modern digital formats. It's like a sort of colored static fuzz, always in flux, and you can't really tell where one thing ends and another begins, but there aren't "pixels" per se. I think tape, both video and audio, has certain "alive" properties that make it seem more magical than current media formats. That's really what I think BJDs are I suppose, a kind of magic. Tulpamancy with physical form.

imgur.com

[Sorry, I haven't posted in ages and I guess don't recall how to embed images correctly]

 

I had the exact same fear, I bought my dolls more than a decade ago and bought many and bought them mainly for display, most also bought blank as I was going for a more statuesque style instead of doll style, I got bored with that display and when I moved for the 1st time I didn't have space for display and tried to figure out what to do sell or keep as I was very hesitant to do anything else than display. after many years with most in hiatus and most of them with most of my dolls in storage and 2 more house moves I m not super worried about how much they worth cause their price has dropped anyway because of time but I now have to figure out if and how I want to display them cause I want a more dolly style now and not the highly statuesque I wanted back then 14 years ago also I have to find which dolls I like to handle and how many I can handle without giving me anxiety. For the ones I want to handle I will do no matter the price because people buy expensive cars and drive them which make them less pristine and used same with clothes people buy them and wear them wash them dry them ... So think of your dolls like an expensive dress would you wear it or leave it in the closet? If you bought the doll to play with it do it same as someone who gets a super nice pair of shoes wears them.

 

There already is very good advice in this thread! Here is my 2 cent:

Been there, done this: I bought another doll, my second one, as cheap as I could get one at the time. She turned up pretty damaged, so I figured, I could hardly make it worse. Learned everything from and with that doll, she continues to be my first choice to try things out. Wireing? Re-stringing? Sueding? Sanding? Here we go! She has become most dear to me, I must say. That‘s the secret ingredient and just how bonding works for me.
Also this: It is an uncomfortable fact, that resin and face ups, even the wig or eyes and outfit can and will age and the perfect doll you are looking at now, is quite likely to change its appearance over time, even if you don’t handle it at all!

These dolls are made to be actively enjoyed in many ways. It is perfectly ok to just look at them. But if you want more, just do it. Can it ruin the doll? Sure it can! Never mind, most things with BJDs can be fixed or replaced! For me that is part of their magic.

 

This was something I struggled with a LOT when I first started collecting. I never connected with my dolls the way other people seem to. I thought I was broken, like why wasn't it happening for me?? Everyone else seemed so happy with their dolls and sharing feelings I just couldn't relate to.

Now that I'm older I realize, that's just not me. I don't shell characters, I don't talk to my dolls, I don't take the places (aside from specifically wanting to photograph them), I don't make up stories for them, and that's okay! I enjoy admiring them and dressing them up and that's enough.

The fear of handling them though, the bright side, is almost any part can be replaced or repaired. There are many skilled artists who fix broken fingers and they look brand new. Even facial repairs can be done. I typically avoid extremely hard surfaces (not easy as my whole house is terrazzo flooring and everything that hits it will shatter) and in 20 years have never broken any dollie bits

 

Learning how to modify and fix dolls a little bit helped me be more touchy and bond with them. I took on my first mod without the right tools but made it work and I felt so accomplished! I have more than a handful of stain treatments under my belt now too and that familiarity makes me less nervous about them being needed.

Since you aren't getting what you expected out of the doll, maybe ask yourself what you expected in the first place?

Do you want a fancy setup for them or would you rather take them out on adventures? Both? A doll that is protected and looks nice is just as genuine of a way to appreciate them as well!

 

I think the issue is that it's normal to keep a leash on your imagination, especially if you're grown up. It takes a bit of effort to let go of that restraint. It's not necessary to shell a character or do anything convoluted to do this, it's just a matter of entering a state of play. But once you've opened that door it's much easier to find enjoyment in things you might've found boring before. In the end there's no special way to enjoy a doll's presence, it's all about what you project on her. You gotta lend a bit of your soul to your doll so to speak.

 

I think it's the natural cycle of being a new dolly owner. And I think like with any other hobby, there's that cycle of "brand new - keep it mint," "intermediate level - going to experiment a bit," "seasoned - try all the things," and "veteran hobbyist - okay...this is my life now". Hahaha. Find what is a good fit for you and your situation as someone new to the hobby, but ultimately enjoy yourself.

Like others have said, do little things here and there. Get comfortable handling your doll. Become a part of the online community whether on DoA, the various other forums and websites out there, start following fellow BJD owners/artists/companies on social media, watch videos, etc.

Once you get more comfortable, do more things with your doll. Buy or make clothing and accessories. Go to tea parties and movies with them. And if you feel a bit brave enough to do it solo or can drag a friend or family member with you, attend a local or reasonable driving distance dolly meet-up. If specific ABJD meet-ups nearby are a no-go for you, try branching out to other dolly and teddy bear conventions, anime/sci-fi conventions, and the like as those tend to have BJDs or BJD owners hanging out there too.

At some point, find a good support network once you do find your dolly community. Not only does it help with discovering new things and being able to enjoy your dolly hobby more with talking to and hanging out with fellow BJD enthusiasts, you do want to have someone out there to help you reign it in or to check in on you and be brutally honest with you to let you know if you start slipping into dolly addiction. Like, for realsies. Or if you or your friend is intensely shy or have anxiety, it's nice to have that one person be like, "Ah, okay, you've hit your limit, let's go home and chill for a while." Little stuff like that.

But yes, something as simple as sitting on the couch with your dolly watching tv with the pets. That's a good start. Just enjoy yourself.

 

Mostly, mine stay on the shelves, but I like to carry mine around every now and then, and sometimes I try different outfits on them.

 

Personally I get the most out of the hobby from taking photos and posting to my doll instagram. Once I made an account just for doll photos, it really opened doors! I really enjoy finding unique clothes, accessories, and making simple jewelry for them to wear. Posting their new looks or setting up a new backdrop is really fun for me and I get a lot from doing it, even though it's something I do in my own time.

 

I've found that crafting or buying new things for the dolls is a huge part of keeping things fresh. Sewing or getting new outfits in the mail and trying them out, or finding props and furniture, or building a doll room is the key IMO. No matter how nice your dolls are, if there's nothing to do but sit them on a shelf, then I think it's pretty normal to get bored eventually. The great thing with dolls is that when you get bored of your setup or outfits, you can change almost everything, and it's like getting new dolls all over again. I got a little swamped in layaways for new dolls and I really miss the time when I only had my first doll and I was spoiling her rotten with new outfits every month. As soon as I'm done I want to get back to that.