Inside the anxiety over having too many dolls

well I am not very much the intented audience for this because I went through several house moves and my space at the house I live now is more limited than before plus many more reasons as less time for collections etc but I thought to add my experience on this

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? I started buying bjd's about 15-16years ago and had not set a limit but in my mind I would be comfortable with a shelf unit *(70x30x200cm) full of them (space wise not money wise lol) but back then I had more space and no responcibilities kids etc so now my limit is far smaller like one shelf of bjd which is about 5-6 sd yes size matters like 1sd is for me about like 1,5-2msd or 3yosd

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? Space and change of interests back in time a doll room seemed amazing so 1shelf unit was the bjd stuff , 2 the several fashion doll types , 1the other types of dolls and figures and my room still had 4shelf units full of books and one with cd's and I used to feel amazing in such a space .... not anymore. Having a family means linen, sheets , towels , blankets far more than when I was alone those are stored in the bedroom , the living room cannot be my "doll room" it is a family room . The "linen" utilities and all my stuff don't fit comfortably in my bedroom and my stuff cannot be in any other room so naturally everything has to be reduced but it creates much anxiety the "how" to do so and "what stays what goes"

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? Well having moved house 3 times didn't help I know moving house is a bit out of theme in the thread but even if I was going to a bigger place the experience of having to pack and tidy everything so many times it would be anxiety causing for me , I'm not good at tidying up AT ALL , it stresses me beyond imagination.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? Yes and that's why I don't have anxiety only for my bjd but for everything in my collections , I sold or gifted most of my books and cd's opting more for e-books and libraries instead for my reading and reducing my fashion dolls collection the bjd's cause me more anxiety because as they are more expensive I have to try to sell them second hand I can't just pop in a library or a charity as with books/fashion dolls and give it away if they are not selling and take up space and that's an extra level of anxiety for me taking nice photos trying to remember all those years later what year I got everything and if it had a coa especially floating heads are a headache but it has to be done one can post online a bunch of barbies and slap a low price tag on and say barbies for sale but you can't get some floating heads price them low and slap "bjd heads for sale" online it gives all the wrong vibes so no matter how high or low I'm willing to price them they have to be identified correctly and have their info right which is stressfull.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? no I know that my dollls won't end up in garbage even if I go crazy and want them out I can always gift them but I will feel enormous guilt If I don't even try to sell them in at least 40-50% of their original price , and just gift them because I had done great sacrifices econimically to purchase them

Does this anxiety come in cycles? yes when I stumble upon something , when I have free time and I'm thinking now I could probably try to take some pics of this doll to sell it and generally times with tight money and times that my room is more untidy even if the untidyness is unrelated to the dolls and the doll are perfectly tidy my anxiety kicks in.

Do you feel judged by the people around you? yes people around me judge me but that's so old that it doesn't affect me anymore , I have dolls , they don't like it , I know they don't and they know I know it and don't care much .... it's more that now I don't like my room like that it's like I'm turning into them and when they judge me I don't care but when I judge me then I have to change.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing? the trigger was "limited sculpt just for one month" , "discontinued sculpt now or never" some of my dolls and many of my floating heads were either to be discontinued, limited or in offer and I was planning that on day I will get bodies and have my tidy nice bjd shelf unit and that in like 40years from then it will be amazing at the end I realised that every day amazing sculpts are discontinued and amazing new ones get sculpted so it was a bit futile though except the floating heads few of my dolls are impulse purchases I look at you soom and your limited ones. I want to reduce my dolls not only by rehoming my "impulse purchases" but many of my conscious ones which at the time I loved but in my current circumstances I think I don't need and don't have enough space or time for.

*EDIT 1shelf unit = a 5-6 shelves bookcase or shelf unit about 70-80cm wide and 2m tall , one shelf is 1 shelf of such a shelf unit

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? I have a limit - space, space, space! And of course, if I can afford it and if I have the opportunity to buy it. I don't have a lot of space for my things, and I often stress about how it's all going to fit. I think I've been pretty savvy in getting more than should fit into small spaces, but at one point, I know I can't "bend" the space any more.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious?
I mentioned space already and having plenty of room is really what stresses me out the most.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past?
Most likely. I've either had to part with my dolls and things in the past due to circumstances or felt that I should part with things because of circumstances (even when I really didn't need to.) This has created a cycle of stress for me where I fear I am gathering too much stuff and will then have to down size and once again re-live parting with things that I love that I might not ever have back.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter?
Clutter - it is a seemingly never ending battle. I like maximalism. I like things everywhere. I don't like blank cold spaces. But just because you have a lot of stuff doesn't mean it has to look cluttered. So I would say I worry a lot that my stuff looks too much like clutter.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness?
Come again?

Does this anxiety come in cycles?
Yes. I don't know why but it comes in when I least expect or sometimes right on time.

Do you feel judged by the people around you?
Not by my close albeit small circle. I know there are people who would judge me, but I don't really care.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing?
I really don't impulse buy. I might go crazy when I see something that is perfect but the I never buy without a painful amount of thought. It has to be perfect and even when I know I made the right choice, I still worry. And yes, it's about space. The triggers behind down sizing, are again, space. As well as feeling stressed out about how many dolls need things, like wigs or shoes or clothes. But that usually passes and I am relieved I have learned to never act when I am feeling anxiety like that. This has kept me from making the same stupid mistakes I made in the past, many of which I still regret.

 

It's really nice seeing relatable commentary from other autistic/neuro-diverse people - reading this thread has really made me feel less alone in my struggles with the hobby ❤︎

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size?
The largest amount of dolls I've had at one time was 5, which did begin feeling a bit overwhelming for me.
I like having a large wardrobe for each character, and that can get a bit hard to juggle when you have so many dolls. Sort of like, "Oh I want to get X doll this item! But... Y doll hasn't had anything new in so long " - I kinda felt like a neglectful parent after a certain point.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious?
Buying new dolls always makes me feel a little guilty and anxious, since I always feel like it could go to savings instead. My spending by no means impacts my 'necessary' expenses, but I am still considerably young and worry that maybe someday the money I spent would have been better in a 'rainy day' fund.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past?
I think the guilt of owning nice, expensive things does come from growing up poor and living in a country where this type of luxury isn't afforded to many. Spending some people's monthly paycheck 5x over on what is not a need can sometimes make me feel immoral, like a bad person.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter?
I don't think so - I grew up with two hoarding parents, I live considerably 'light' in regards to decor/collectables to avoid falling into that hole.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness?
A little, I suppose - but I live a somewhat 'green' life that I think counters the effects the production of my dolls may have.

Does this anxiety come in cycles?
I would say so. Right after a new purchase, normally.

Do you feel judged by the people around you?
No. I'm pretty reclusive, so the only people who really know about my hobby in real life are either neutral or support me fully, for which I am very thankful.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away?
"Pretty thing? I want the pretty thing!!" - when I first joined the hobby, I really didn't know what I liked or what aesthetic I wanted to go for, so I just tried them all. It didn't seem to matter if I really liked them all that much, I just had to try and figure it out. I was/have been a revolving door for a while, but I have since sat down and thought more about it - what I truly like vs what I just like to look at. I don't have to own every doll I think is pretty, just ones that truly speak to me.

What are the triggers behind downsizing?
There are two, I suppose.

If something goes wrong - for example a hybrid I had planned didn't work, something broke, I can't figure something out - I feel bad about my mistake and want to purge everything related to that doll, it's even worse if I own multiple from one brand (it was bad when I collected vinyl dolls) because I will start seeing them all in that negative light even if they were perfectly fine before.
Or I go into a sort of panic response if there are any 'potential threats' in real life. A part of my PC died? Oh well - I will now sell off my entire collection even though I don't need to. Compensating, I suppose, for the necessities expense.

I have sold off dolls I regret because of these bad habits, but having honest reflections like these really help work through the issue.

 

I’ve been in the hobby for over 18 years and I’m only just now experiencing this. I have over 50 dolls now and I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed. I’ve been thinking lately of selling off most of my MSDs because I haven’t touched them in about 2 years. I still like the dolls but I’d rather spend my limited free time with my other dolls.

I’m not sure what to do because I dont want to regret selling them and I don’t know if maybe I’m just in a slump but I also don’t want dolls sitting around collecting dust. I think I might just slowly selling them off. I’ve identified a few that I definitely don’t see myself regretting selling so I’ll start with those and maybe put the others away in boxes and see how I feel about them after a few months.

The idea of having a smaller collection of very spoiled dolls really appeals to me but I think it’ll take time for me to part with some of the ones I used to really enjoy.

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? I don't have a set limit but I think if I start to feel uncomfortable, that would be it! I have a lot of dolls and all in different sizes. I think size does matter in this case since most of my dolls are under 1/3. Most are easy to store and I can just put 1/6 and 1/12 in book boxes if I tossed out their original boxes.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? It's the issue of space for them and their boxes.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? No.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? No, but I do want to keep my things clean and not have them just to gather dust. I often clean and reorganize, and as long as they fit into their designated spaces, it's fine.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? A bit. I try not to order new accessories and limit it to me making something from my fabric stash or buying secondhand.

Does this anxiety come in cycles? Yes. Sometimes I feel like I have too many things, but I just really needed to reorganize them. Dust them off, check if they need to be restrung and any other maintenance needed.

Do you feel judged by the people around you? No. And if I did, I would not care since almost everyone has a hobby that would be considered a 'waste of money'

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing? I follow the KonMari method. If it no longer sparks joy, I will sell/repurpose it. For impulse purchases, I managed to mostly curb it. Most my impulse buys are usually for dolls or accessories that I have already wanted and now just have a variant available, or it's cheap. Honestly, impulse buys aren't really a thing for me anymore since I have a rule that it must sit in the cart for two weeks minimum before I make my decision.

It's easy to get overwhelmed for collecting, and it's going to happen to every collector eventually. I do well with a larger collection, so I have a higher threshold for this. I do worry about how many dolls I have and are on preorder though. I have a rule that if I can no longer put all of their boxes into their storage spaces, then I am no longer able to buy dolls until I sell some. The problem is, I love all of the ones I have right now and they all spark joy. My fomo has decreased by a large amount, and missing out on dolls no longer bothers me since I already have so many dolls I love. If you feel overwhelmed, I recommend reorganizing and see how you feel afterwards.

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size?
I started out in this hobby setting arbitrary size and number limits, but slowly over time I realized this just wasn’t me. I needed the freedom to collect my characters freely and without limitations…letting the only limit be my imagination and creativity. I was creating a fantasy world here, so different sizes for fanciful beings made perfect sense. My limits are instead space related. I have created several artistic vignettes throughout my home, and that’s where the dolls live…so no doll is purchased without a preplanned place for it to be. I’m very strict with myself about this because I don’t want my displays overly cluttered. Every new character must 1st, enhance the story and 2nd, fit in neatly. I’m a maximalist at heart but everything must still be tidy and make sense.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious?
My anxiety only happens when a doll doesn’t “fit” in, story-wise or space-wise. That drives me crazy. And it will permeate my thoughts, niggling at the back of my brain until I can resolve the issue. I call it a “dollemma” and I’ll work on it for as long as it takes to come up with a solution. Sometime it can take weeks and almost always involves a very long walk to work it all out. Only if it can’t be resolved will I finally sell the doll…but this hasn’t happened in years.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past?
Most likely. I came home from school one day at the age of 12 to find that my mother had suddenly sold all my dolls (every last one of them) to buy herself a new cocktail dress. Her justification was that they were neatly stored in my closet, so I was obviously too old and didn’t want them anymore. I’d thought they were safe and it broke my heart. So today no doll ever gets “put away” in my own home…all must be constantly on display in an artistic way. If one doesn’t fit in, it causes me no end of angst…and the issue must be resolved in one way or another.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter?
Not really. I have a large collection after so many years in the hobby. It will be 60 dolls once the last of my preorders finally arrive home. And although I’m a maximalist at heart, everything is kept neat and tidy by design. I’m one of those “a place for everything and everything in its place” sort of gals. I’m very cognizant of my home’s feng shui…everything must flow smoothly and peacefully. So managing this large a collection is no small feat, but it works. My only struggle happens when a doll character doesn’t “fit” for some reason.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness?
Not at all. My husband and I (as seniors) have lessened our carbon footprints by completely giving up driving in favor of our city’s excellent eco-friendly public transit. So I figure we’re way ahead of the game on this issue. I also make almost all of my dolls’ wardrobes myself (I love exploring fashion.) And nearly all my doll displays and vignettes have been created by repurposing second-hand furniture purchased at charity shops.

Does this anxiety come in cycles?
Only in that if something doesn’t fit physically or character wise, it will drive me crazy until I resolve it. So if a new doll comes in, that’s always a risk. I’ll figure it out and adjust their character or their story or their space eventually. But because my space is so limited and precise, it’s always a possibility I have to be aware of when a new one comes in.

Do you feel judged by the people around you?
Heavens no…they wouldn’t dare!

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away?
I’m very good at resisting impulse buys. I’ve always had as my #1 rule: no character, no purchase. So any doll I’ve brought into my home has a definite purpose in mind, and this helps keep mistakes to a minimum. It’s only when a doll “jumps character” on me that it can be an issue. This just happened recently as a matter of fact, and I did consider selling her after years and years of not selling any. But I let this particular “dollemma” sit with me for awhile until a new character presented itself, which she smoothly and happily then slid into. I was very happy about it because I really loved this head!

What are the triggers behind downsizing?
My downsizing has always been dictated by upgrades or refinement of my collection. Like I’ve said, everything simply has to “fit” character and space wise. They have to tell a story…my story…and if they don’t, it would be time for them to go. But fortunately I’ve honed my personal aesthetics and display spaces so well by this point, I haven’t had to sell a doll in years despite having a large collection.

 

Awww, I feel honored that my crew gets remembered! And I don't mind discussing the deeper things, I'm just not always sure where to draw the line. But related to that: I just got my ADHD diagnosis yesterday, and it actually explains so many things about how I handle the hobby and my never ending revolving door. Now that we're working on that, I'm hoping it'll help me settle into a more permanent crew I can work with and improve for the rest of my time in the hobby!

 

-- What is your limit? Does it depend on the size?
I shell characters with my dolls, and currently I want my crew to be a single ensemble cast. So my limit depends on how many characters I can hold in my imagination at one time. Currently, the number seems to be around 9-10 characters, so, 9-10 dolls is my limit. I currently own 7 BJDs, and have a full doll and a floating head on order. In fact, I might end up selling 1 of my current dolls.

Yes, my limit depends on size. Minis and especially tinies are not significant in my imagination -- I have a 1/12 tiny BJD that I barely remember that I own (that's the 1 doll I may sell later). Since I want to shell OCs, I've banned myself from buying anything smaller than 1/3 because I can forsee that I'll lose interest in them, forget they exist, and they'll end up languishing as clutter, which will affect me negatively. My favourite size, 1/3, is too big to ignore -- I have and will move these dolls on if I have no more reason to own them.


-- What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious?
Someone earlier in the thread said that every doll is like a new mouth to feed -- I agree. I'm very hands on with my dolls, I love to pose them and take photos and tell stories through them. So not only do I have to also make/buy wig, eyes, clothes for a new doll, I also have the "ongoing service costs" of playtime, storytelling, character development and relationships with the rest of the cast.

I love these characters I've made and shelled into dolls, I want to keep servicing them -- but I have only so much attention, time, energy and money to go around. Too many characters in my head, too many unfinished projects, too much ongoing service costs... all are sources of anxiety, which leads to overwhelm and resentment of the things that cause that discomfort. I don't want to resent my dolls, so I'm currently doing everything I can to stay in my peaceful, not-overwhelmed, happy place with them. This involves taking a default stance of not buying a new doll when I don't have any reason to get one.


-- Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past?
Highly doubt it.


-- Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter?
As mentioned above, it's mostly the mental "clutter"/overwhelm that affects me. But in terms of physical space, I'm a minimalist at heart and I don't have a collector personality, the only true physical collections I have are books and BJDs. And even my book library consists of two 1metre-tall bookcases -- small by most people's standards.

I periodically go through destash/spring cleaning phases where I get rid of old things and I'm pretty ruthless about it. (When my two bookcases get full, I'm more likely to cull books instead of buy a new bookshelf. Same with my wardrobe, and other parts of my home.) I can see myself becoming ruthless with my dolls, and I don't want to be, so again, I take a default stance of not buying dolls in the first place.


-- Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness?
No. If I have any anxiety over this, it has to do with living modestly, within my means, without spending money frivolously.


-- Does this anxiety come in cycles?
I go through the occasional existential crisis when I wonder if anything is worth doing, and maybe I should just purge my life of all my acquisitions. When this happens, there's a risk that my dolls will get caught up in it, but they don't trigger it.


-- Do you feel judged by the people around you?
No, on the contrary, everyone around me loves my dolls and has been supportive of this hobby. External validation (or lack of) isn't an issue for me.


-- What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing?
I'm not prone to impulse buying, but in the rare time it happened, it had to do with poor mental health and looking for a way to numb pain. I didn't buy the doll for its own sake (though I kinda liked it), I was trying to use it to cope with bigger life issues. Unfortunately dolls can't really address life and mental health challenges. When they stopped being "helpful" and I realized what I was doing, I sold them.

I haven't bought so many dolls that I'd need to "downsize" the collection (selling a doll I didn't bond with doesn't count). Actual downsizing for me is triggered by that existential crisis mentioned above, but so far, my dolls haven't been affected by it. I hope they'll never be.

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? My limit is about 12 or so from what I've noticed, and it definitely depends on size. Tinies are fine and MSDs are a little stressful, but I can't have more than 2 SDs.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? When my room gets cluttered it negatively affects my mood, so having a lot of dolls allows it to feel cluttered faster.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? Nope.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? Not really, but I have only so much space and when I get overwhelmed I start to panic.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? No. If I was that eco-conscious, I wouldn't buy dolls in the first place due to rumination.

Does this anxiety come in cycles? Yes, I have a pretty nasty buy-sell cycle.

Do you feel judged by the people around you? Not really. The people in my life are supportive of my hobbies. I do experience feelings of shame that I can buy dolls pretty easily while others can't, though. So I feel bad that I have those periods of buying things just because my brain is telling me to do it.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing? I have a mood disorder, so I'll go through periods of wanting to buy everything, and when that passes I tend to find that I didn't really like/need the doll for my collection in the first place.

 

It’s really comforting to see everyone’s responses to this. Make me feel less alone!

1) I don’t know what my limit is yet, but I think I’m reaching it. I am currently about to have 20 dolls, and I think that might be as many as I’d like to have at least with my current living situation. There are two other sculpts I can currently think of that I would really like to own someday. But other than that, as much as I really love some sculpts I’ve seen, I think I could say no to them. I’m hoping to reduce my accumulations in the coming years to only 1 or 2 per year. I don’t think I’d like to ever go over 30.

2) I feel anxious personally because I look at everything I have, and I just think: man, I am so incredibly blessed. There are so many people in the world that would never be able to afford even one of these. I’m a charitable person and try a lot to give back, but even so, I still feel guilty for having what I have. And at the end of the day, they’re just possessions, too. They won’t last forever. So for me, it’s walking the line of “am I being excessive? Could I be using my resources in a better way to help other people? Is this selfish? Could I be using this money for something more ultimately valuable?” That sort of thing. Lots of deep-thinking.

3) I don’t really have any particular triggers. I’ve always had all I wanted, though when I was a child, my father did give all of my toys to my sisters when I did not visit him “enough” (separated parents). That might have had some influence on my desire to collect, but I don’t think it was a very prominent one. I’ve been very fortunate.

4) Ugh, it definitely has a correlation to my struggle with clutter! But that’s because I live in a small space. I’m still at home, and I just have my room, so I am most definitely running out of it. My parents have been generous allowing me to store things in the attic and basement, and so has a good friend of mine. But every time I put something away it adds to that feeling of having too much, of needing to give things away. When I move out, I’m sure there’s going to be a lot of tough calls with my other things. I’ve really been feeling like I need to have one thing I collect and focus on, and that has helped some with the anxiety. I’ve told myself I will not buy anything, even if I really like it, unless it furthers my goals in this hobby and honestly that’s been really helpful. (Barring necessities here of course)!

5) I don’t really tie BJD’s into sustainability. There’s so many other things that are a worse problem and I do my best to do that; like not buying from places like Shein and Temu.

6) Other anxieties for sure trigger my collecting anxieties. It’s sort of that concept that your brain spirals, once you think of one bad thing, you keep going and going. I’ve been doing my best to cut that out too!

7) I do feel somewhat judged by people around me. Overall, my friends and family are very supportive of my collecting, but I fear the same thing, that they will think I’m excessive and selfish really for the money I spend. That really concerns me.

8) Triggers for impulse buying? Stress. Work stress, life stress, any kind of stress. I thankfully am not a doll impulse buyer, but I do sometimes impulse buy accessories when I am feeling down. I’ve helped that habit a lot by making myself pause and think: what doll will use this? Does this actually match the aesthetic I have in mind for someone? Do I want this for a reason other than it being a good deal? It’s really helped.

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size?
I have an arbitrary number of 13. I was born on the 13th so it’s like a lucky number lol However size contributes too. 13 MSD’s would be too many and I cap them at 5. In my mind 2 tinies equal a MSD So it’s okay to have more of them

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious?
If I have too much stuff in general I get a little claustrophobic. I like decor and pretty things but they need room to shine. I don’t like crowding my things. I even make sure there are gaps between my hangers lol I just like that balance of stuff and space!

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past?
No, other than my generalized anxiety disorder maybe?

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter?
I used to struggle with clutter and holding onto things. But I’ve learned to be more minimalist and I’m getting better at striking the balance I’m comfortable with.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness?
Sometimes I think about my “footprint” and all that. But I think a lot of it is a bunch of greenwashing anyways. Us buying small batch art dolls is nothing compared to all the other plastic stuff being made.

Does this anxiety come in cycles?
I’m moving somewhat soon so I’ve been nervous about how I will transport them all. Kinda makes me want to sell a few. Usually, the urge to purge comes on if I have them haphazardly displayed or they look too crowded on the shelf.

Do you feel judged by the people around you?
Thankfully no. My family has always been pretty easy going. My small group of friends also have their odd hobbies, interests, or collections. Anybody who thinks I’m weird most be keeping their comments to themselves lol

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing?
My perfectionism triggers the need to downsize. Funny enough my impulse purchases aren’t usually the first to go. It’s the ones who I overthink and plan for I guess during the wait time I build them up in my mind and when they don’t live up to expectations I pass them on. I think of the dolls I have now the instock and second hand dolls outnumber the preordered ones.

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? My limit went from "Just these two" to over 30 in my first stint with the hobby. Then, after getting very sick and having to focus elsewhere for the better part of 7 or 8 years, I was able to return with a renewed vigor. Now, I went from limiting myself to 12, changing that to 20... and now realizing that the number isn't what matters at all for me, it's the connection and having them all be complete and fully fledged characters with their own "lives". Without that, they're pretty hunks of resin that collect dust and I freak out, so it's really more about me feeling they're complete than it is the number in total. Size IS a big factor, though. All my 1/3 dolls are kept on a 5-shelf bookshelf, which means only 4 shelves because the bottom is pointless unless I want all their legs sticking straight out. If I cram them in, I have space for 5 per shelf (4 per shelf is better, but in a pinch...), so top end is 25 for 1/3 dolls. Tinies is a different story, since I can stick them anywhere. Right now, all my tinies are OT and I don't really even count them in my total. (Current breakdown: 23 SD (plus 1 in her box while I work on a new character for her, 1 on layway and 1 in the works), 1 MSD (who I also don't count since he's not really a character, he was my first doll and I can't let him go), and 11 off topic tinies (plus 1 incoming. These are pets off Etsy or Blind Box kids, so all really cheap))

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? When I start feeling the connection slipping, that's when my brain starts going crazy thinking of all the money I spent on this doll/character, and the anxiety goes from my usual (which is bad enough) into overdrive and it sucks. lol. I do have some mental issues (I won't go into that here) but they sure don't help.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? In a way? I grew up poor, and often heard my parents fighting about money... while also maxing the credit cards for random crap. So now, even as an old lady, I still feel guilty any time I spend money on something that's not a necessity unless I keep it forever. So any time I get too many dolls, or it feels I've bought too much in a short span, etc. then I have to basically talk myself into not being guilty both with buying and selling.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? No, not at all.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? Again, not at all.

Does this anxiety come in cycles? Yeah. Like I said, I have other mental issues, and sometimes they like to play havoc with my brain.

Do you feel judged by the people around you? Nope. My boyfriend doesn't care, he's a gamer so he gets it to some extent. My few friends are either also in the hobby or just don't care anyway. And anyone else? Why would I care what they think? It's my money, not theirs.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing?
Buying: When I have a chunk of money and get shop-happy or need/want "retail therapy", am in a depressed cycle, or just have too many ideas and can't seem to focus on just one at a time.
Downsizing: When I've lost the bond with a character. I don't sell much at all anymore, but when I was sick I also sold a lot because I needed the money. That's really about the most I've ever downsized at one time.