Is it 'OKAY' to PM an Owner about Selling a doll they had NO intention to sell?

Sounds kinda tacky. o: I dunno, I probably would be a little annoyed if I got a PM like that.

 

I just got my first PM asking me to sell.
I'm feeling a bit guilty, because I do have more than one doll, but on the other hand, they're my dolls, and this is the only type of male dolls that appeal to me.

I probably shouldn't be feeling as guilty as I do.

 

Let me guess... one of your Dollshe boys?

Don't feel guilty, no one has the right to make you feel bad about the dolls you have, even if you had fifty of them no one has the right to do that.

 

I must confess that I've been tempted to message someone if they would consider selling their doll; but it would have been in the way mentioned in the first post - I would praise the doll and ask the owner to remember me if they ever wanted to sell.

I've never done it, though. I wasn't aware that it's not allowed, so now I'm happy I never did it; but I do understand people that do. Especially if they - like me - don't have access to the market place yet. It's really hard for a new doll owner that you can't access the place where you can get some goodies for your doll. Or maybe get another doll without having to wait 2-3 months to get it from a shop.

E.g. I want a Puki. In Denmark they're rarely put up for sale. I found one - bought it - and realised that I had paid more than the price for a new one - and this Puki was defect. I didn't know before I got it; because the seller said it was in perfect shape. Well, it wasn't - and now it's going to be returned even though I'm completely in love with the little creature...

I don't want to swamp the different forums with lots of stupid topics or whatever just to get the number of posts needed to get access to the market place, so I'll just have to wait. I do understand why some people that doesn't have access yet will ask some doll owners directly if they want to sell; but I don't do it myself.

 

Cyn, I have no idea why would you feel quilty No reason at all. You can have 1000 dolls and still have the every right to say "frakfrakfrak off" to that poor person with no dollies if she/he keeps bugging you

boots, getting access to the Market Place is not very hard... and it doesn't always involve writing stupid comments -- just visit the galleries and look at those pretties, so hi to our new members... Market Place gives you a chance to compare prices etc., pming on owner when you have no idea how hard/easy it is to buy your wanted doll is not a good idea^^;

 

Yeah - I know.... But I get so caught up when I watch pictures etc. that I forget to leave comments.... And I'm still in the process of chewing through old posts; because I don't want to look dumb - asking a question that has been asked 100 of times before...

It wouldn't really bother me if someone asked if I wanted to sell my Colette. I would probably feel flattered that anyone would have any interest in her - and then I would simply answer 'no' - she's not for sale. I can understand, though, if owners that gets pms every single day - and maybe several if they own lots of dolls - gets annoyed. I would too.

I don't understand how it can make anyone feel bad when they get these pms, though. I haven't read all the posts in this thread, so maybe it has to do with the way they write.. But - noone should feel guilty or bad because they have a lot of dolls and don't want to sell any. The dolls aren't less worth for an owner because there are many... Every single doll means something to the owner - and if they wanted to sell, they'd probably put them up for sale....

 

And that's what you should - hit the report button. In that case I understand. And maybe the report button should be used more often. I mean - it's not allowed - and it's in the rules, right? So - no excuses. Especially for those that think they can get anything if they just pay enough.... Maybe there are so many of these because not enough people press the button? I mean - when they've been reported once they're not going to repeat it - unless they're really dumb, that is....

Edit: To your add.... I wonder what's wrong with some people. But I guess it has always been like that. Some people think that everything can be bought. I would like to see their faces when they're told the price; because I know from family that they're shocked when they hear what a bjd costs. They think it's about the same as a Barbie doll... *lol*

 

Why on earth would you feel guilty about not selling something that you rightfully own? You're not withholding food from a hungry child. No one is going to die because you have multiple dolls and they don't have any. If somebody gave you a sob story or played the guilt card trying to get you to sell, then their sense of entitlement is way off the map in my opinion, and they need to go right back in the little hole they crawled out of and stop bothering decent people.

 

Ok this actually happened again but with a different doll, and this time I'm not happy. I received a PM a little while ago from someone asking me to sell my DZ Megi. I have often said that I have some unpleasant memories attached to him. I had a lot of abuse for owning him (because of the copying issues) and I find him quite ugly.
Just because I say things like this does not mean I want to sell him. I really do not appreciate getting PM's saying "If you hate him so much sell him to me. I can give him a better home than you can" and "you should sell him because he deserves better"
Excuse me?
I treat him very well thankyou very much. I still love him to bits all the same because he was my first doll and he is adorable. Just because I say he's ugly doesn't mean I don't like him or that I 'mistreat' him. I wouldn't have minded if I had said that I was considering selling him but I've always pointed out that I adore him regardless of his flaws.

Surely complaining or saying negative things about your doll is not a another way of saying I want to sell....

 

I think you should report that person. Right now!

 

So I have something to add to this. The other day after the elfdoll flower elves and sissy seedling had been released someone *wont say there name cause im nice * said they had gotten a sissy seedling and implied that it didnt fit in there doll collection. I pm'ed the girl asking if she was thinking of maybe selling it. I wasnt blunt I was actually kidna timid because I didnt want her to think I was pushign ehr to sell it. I also asked if she had any pics. She was fine with it said she might keep it but would take pics. So I waited and waited and about two days later I pm'ed her asking if she had taken the pics. Okay, maybe I was being a bit anxious to see her shes so cute. She replied rather bluntly sayign she had a job and worked alot. So I said that fine sorry to pester you i found pics of it on flickr anyways. NOw this is after the exchange of 5 pm's this is what she said

...........Did I deserve that? Was it that bad? I thought I had said I understand her not wanting to sell it all I wanted was pics..........Am I being blind? Was I too forward? I don't think ill ever ask anything liek that again

 

I've sold a doll, regretted it, then PMed a person saying if you ever end up selling her, please contact me first.

I felt kind of weird doing it, wasn't requesting her to sell her back to me necessarily, I just wanted to let her know if she ever at all wanted to part with her, I'd be willing to buy her in a snap.

 

To Half.Jak: I think it does sound a bit harsh from her side; but maybe she got not 2-3; but 10-12 - or more - pms asking the same. Of course that's not your fault; but sometimes it's the one that makes the milk run over (or what you say in english.. ;o)....

Some people will call people rude for just about anything and nothing, so I wouldn't take that so seriously. She probably was stressed out and it just happened to be you that had to take the blow....

Edit: But - that being said - what you did was actually not allowed to do in this forum. As far as I understand you're not allowed to contact anyone via PM to ask them if they want to sell their doll.

 

yeah I guess -.- it was just so unexpected and ...... harsh xD

 

I don't understand how you can take that pm badly. She politely informed you that she found your actions rude. She wasn't mean, didn't call you names. She may be right, may be wrong, but only you and she knows which, without us seeing the PMs. Right now, we only have your word for it. Either take it to heart or ignore her and get on with your life.

As for the original debate, I am glad I've never had anyone pm me to buy dolls that were not for sale. It's rude, simple as that. I wouldn't ask someone on the street to sell me their handbag or the book they were reading, so why should I ask someone randomly to sell me their doll? It just isn't appropriate, but unfortunately it seems like a lot of people forget common politeness when they are online.

 

I've never really had that happen ((not really having awesome enough dolls) but if that did happen, I would try to be polite. If they offered enough, I would sell and get a new one of the same mold.
But I dont find it rude if it is a simple pm asking if you are willing to sell. If you say no and they pester you, then yes. yes it is

 

Actually I saw a mold i really wanted insanely always on my one friends doll list. She sells dolls sometimes so i mentioned in the pm i was sending that day that I saw she owned him and if she ever was selling him id be interested. Turns out she was thinking of selling him but only wanted to sell fullset! She was nice and held him for me and ill get to pick him up this tues from dollclub and bring him home!

Im so glad i asked about him ^squee

 

Some people actually do ask people on the street to sell them things, especially if the owner looks poor. When my mother was little, a rich couple even asked if my grandmother would sell her and my aunt to them. (Naturally, the answer was NO!)

I don't really understand the concept, though. Why would you want somebody else's doll if it is obvious (and it must be, since the owners have posted enough about them for others to know about them), that the owners like them enough to spend time and effort on them? Especially if that effort is what makes you like the doll in the first place. And if it isn't the effort, then why not just buy the sculpt?

For me, other dolls are pretty, but they wouldn't be mine unless what made them unique was something I had done to them/commissioned myself.

 

Well - I think we're all different - and thank God for that...

If those that are asking are new (read: don't own a doll yet) they probably just want to get one the easy - and fast - way. I can understand them - as I said earlier - but I can't understand those that ask so bluntly - and even add personal 'attacks' when they get a 'no'. And then there are those that knows about the work that is invested in some of these dolls. They're not able to do it themselves - or they simply don't have the patience - so they see a beautiful doll and they want it - so they ask. And sometimes they probably succeed..

And then there's the generation that aren't used to getting a 'no'. They're used to getting whatever they want - here and now - without doing anything else for it than grab for the money....

The second kind are probably also the same that after a short while place the doll in a corner and forgets all about it. It's the 'getting the item' that matters - having it isn't as interesting.

I also think there are some people that simply wants to be accepted into a community. They think that they need a special doll to be a part of e.g. DoA, so they need a doll - fast. It's not the doll that are important - it's the community. There are so many lonely people these days.

So - I think that if someone approach you asking you to sell your doll to them - just say 'no' if you're not interested in selling - say it in a friendly way - and if the person then continues pestering you - report him/her. Easy as that. That way you wont hurt anyone not knowing what the background of their request is. It doesn't hurt you to be nice - it doesn't cost you anything either.

I hope you understand my sometimes rather bad english. It's not always easy to explain what you mean in a language that isn't your own....