Is it 'OKAY' to PM an Owner about Selling a doll they had NO intention to sell?

I agree with that last part, especially since the economy is not doing so great. Sometimes, dolls tend to stay for sale on the marketplace for long periods of time. If you eventually decide to sell a doll and go directly to the person who asked you, then I think it makes 2 very happy people. Maybe I'm too positive, but this issue is becoming a little heated and personal lately, it's ok to give an opinion but not everybody has to agree with it.

 

I think it's rude, at least when asked in a certain way. If someone just came up to me in the store and pointed at my shirt and said, "Hey, you sellin' that? I'll give you 20 bucks," I would find it a little strange and rude. But if someone, (as stated before), said something along the lines of, (talking dolls now), "If you ever have to sell, I'll be sure to give him/her a good home", then I think it's alright.
As long as they don't bug you I don't see the problem.

 

I Dont own one yet, i think it would be 'okay' to ask, but i personally wouldn't unless they had it for sale.

I would get pretty annoying if i said no to someone and they kept pestering, im not that type of person, sounds like u get alot on annoying poeple on this forum lol

 

i think its really stupid from someone to ask someone else: hey, would u like to sell ur doll to me? when the person nerver said its for sell. ppl (normally) love their dolls and put effort in making faceup or just choosing the dolls and its acsessories (its an art ;P). so if he doesnt say its for sale, dont bother!! it srly gotta be annoying... i'd be like: NO its mine!! MINNNNEH!! T_T get ut own!
but it would also be stupid to report someone just for that...
so all u have to do is answer: dude, GET UR OWN!!
XD dont forget to tell the person where u bought it.

 

If the doll that you are asking about is not a limited and you are just asking becuase you like something about it (maybe a mod or custom face-up), then no it is not ok. It is very rude. What you should do in that scenario is compliment the owner on their doll and ask what sculpt the doll it (if you don't already know) and who did the face-up/mod. Then you go out, get your own doll and customize it. But to just flat out ask "Can I buy your doll?" is just rude.

Now, if the doll in question is a limited or discontinued doll, that is somewhat different, and it also depends on how you ask. Saying something like "I really admire that sculpt. I know you are probably very attached to her, but if at any point you do consider selling her, I would like to make an offer, so please keep me in mind" is not so inappropriate. You are showing respect for the owner and voicing an interest without being overtly rude. But in it's own way it is still a little rude. But if someone were to make such a comment to me, I don't think I would be upset about it. I guess in this kind of case it kind of depends on the delivery of the 'offer'. I wouldn't say it was okay, but there are ways of voicing an interest in purchasing a doll without being so rude.

 

I think it would really bother me if they were pushy about it or PM'd me more than once... but saying "i really love your doll if you ever wanna part with them then let me know" is more of a compliment. Someone said on here "thats like someone coming up to you and asking you if you will sell your dog" and someone has actually done that to me before when i was walking my dog and i just laughed and was like "there's not enough money in the world.".... same thing with my dolls.

 

I'm frecuently tented to PM some users, because they have some doll that I have so much doubts off but always feel not very confident.... and I realize not every one like PM by an extranger n///n

 

I feel it's in bad taste, at least when they offer an amount. With that being said, I'm not going to be peeved if they offer an amount and I replied with a simple, at this time the doll isn't for sale and probably offer a reason such as this doll is special because I did my first face up on her, or he is my first doll and very dear to me. If they keep insisting or keep upping their offers like that would make a difference then I may report them to DoA, but I feel these issues can be solved quickly with a simple answer and reason why, most people take the hint and let the issue go

 

I may be seen as the odd one out but I don't find this is rude. I'd find it very flattering. Perhaps I think this way because throughout my life I've owned or made many unique things. I would usually have people offer me money for my clothing, my accessories, fabric, hair extensions I was wearing, etc... Pretty much most of what I own people have offered to buy it. I even had an offer on buying one of my cats. I find it flattering even when people would offer money on things I am attached to.

I think some people may not be aware at the attachment some people have with the dolls (or anything else for that matter). I wouldn't hold it against them that they did not know about that which is why I would only be flattered by their offers.

If someone got out of hand and wouldn't take no as an answer then I would have a problem. But otherwise I am fine with this issue mainly because I'm used to it and always see it as flattering.

I'm pretty easy going to these sorts of things.

To be honest most things that people have offered to buy from me I have never sold but who knows someone could ask at the right moment. O_o

 

I think it's kind of like doll poaching. I would feel uncomfortable if anyone wanted to buy my doll. What gives them the right to even think I would part with something so special?

 

I think I would take it as a compliment really. Most people put alot into their dolls and if someone else admires it then I see that as a compliment. As long as the person asked in a polite way & didn't constantly ask about the doll. For example something along the lines of "I think your doll is amazing and have admired it for a long time. If, on the off chance, you ever decided to sell it I would be interested" wouldn't really bother me.

That being said I don't think I would ever do this....it doesn't seem necessary when you could just post in the MP to see if anyone would be willing to sell that same mould. That's my opinion. =^.^=

 

I didn't have anyone PM me here, but I posted my doll pics on my myspace page and I got a lot of "will you ever think of selling him"'s.

Most of the comments were how beautiful he was.

how can I be offended by that? I just simply say "I would never sell one of my prized possessions, plus he was customized to fit me, but if you really want one, you can get one (insert site here). You can even customize them to fit YOUR personality."

Like Sweetkitties27 said, I would never do this myself. I've jokingly said to someone "Wanna sell him" or "Can I have him" when admiring their doll, but I would never seriously ask someone if they would ever sell their doll. If they wanted to, they'd put an ad here or on ebay... so there is no reason to ask. If they're not on Ebay, then they're probably not for sale.

However, I can't see being upset or offended by it. Like SK27 said... It's more like a compliment. It just means your doll is THAT beautiful.

 

It seems kind of rude to come and ask to sell something you love; like going up to someone in the mall and saying "Hey, your kid's pretty cute, you selling?"

 

I'd personally be offended. if you wouldn't go up to some random stranger on the street and say, would you sell your car to me for x amount of money, you shouldn't ask about a doll that way.
I think it's a matter of discretion. It's perfectly alright to love a doll, and admire someone elses doll, but ethically I think it's very rude and a little selfish. It's almost like you'd feel entitled to it, regardless of it belonging to someone else.

I would report them, personally.

 

I also agree. I actually feel it is ok to PM someone to state that you are interested in a certain doll in a polite way. I prefer to buy my dolls second hand and have my money go to someone who needs it. I'm a newbie and I've seen a few dolls that I have missed out on as they were a limited release before I got into BJDs. I haven't PMd anyone about them yet, I will watch the secondhand market for 6months to a year and see what happens but I don't see anything wrong with putting feelers out there.

Same goes for receiving PMs. I might be somewhat not as bonded with a doll but giving a concerted effort. For example my first doll of a different size, I might feel that the new size doesn't fit in with my family and if someone expressed interest it would almost feel like a safety net. Knowing that if the doll really wasn't for me that there was another loving home just waiting to care for it. Easy sale and hapiness all round.

 

I like Taco's suggestion of posting in the Want to Buy section. Since it's against the forum rules to approach someone, it should not be done. But even from an ethical standpoint, I agree with others here who've said it's not in good taste.

 

I am not okay with people PM-ing me to ask me to sell my dolls because they look nicer or something. Mine aren't limited, but an example.

I didn't get PMs...I get it in real life. A girl who had an AOD Gu, suggested to me a trade between mine and hers as mine looks way better than hers. And she even said she didn't mind just trading the head as ultimately they have the same bodies.

I felt that it was rather rude of her to suggest that when I've been gushing about Apollo to her. I mean, it shows that I love him enough to not want to let him go right? So why did she suggest?

The worst part, and I seriously mean worst, is when she said, 'but it doesn't matter since you can do face-ups. So you can just do your face-up on his head and can still name him Apollo, just that I'll take your doll's head and change his name to XXX...' I was super mighty pissed. But I didn't blow my temper because she's a kid. Only...what? 13? 14?

But if I did mention or suggested somewhere, sometime that I might sell my dolls or that I was in need of money, such a suggestion wouldn't piss me off. But I would like it as 'would you mind selling your doll to me?' instead of a, 'let's trade' or a 'please sell him to me at $xxx...'.

 

Wow, what she did was seriously rude.

 

It doesn't matter how old someone is, that's still rude! You'd been gushing about how much you love your doll and someone suggests a trade because yours looks better than theirs? Plain rude. And clearly they were acting selfishly. You're a better person than I am because I'd have told them in no uncertain terms that while I'm flattered they like my doll, he is absolutely not for sale or for trade.

I've actually done the opposite of this and PM'ed people who have seemed interested in my dolls about sales and/or trades. I want to collect only Volks dolls now, so I want to find good homes for my non-Volks dolls. If I notice that someone has an interest in a Puki Cupid or a Souldoll mini, I'll drop them a PM and see if they are interested in mine I don't see anything wrong with that because they've expressed an interest in the sculpt already and they can either say yes or no It's not the same as cold calling and asking to buy someone's doll when the owner hasn't expressed a wish to sell.

 

Jinnyaih > Ya...well...many types of people exist...-sighs-

Jescissa > Well, today I went to the local AOD agent's shop and told her what happened. Apparently, the girl had dropped her Gu countless times and has been sanded by the agent to a point that unless you've been staring at him for long, you'll never notice that he has been dented. So she went round asking people if they'd trade their Gu heads with hers. Thank BJD-Goddess that everyone know about her intentions and maybe I'm the only slow one.

This is my friend's view since she doesn't have a DOA account. I mentioned about this debate to her to see what she think. Apparently on our local forums(2 in fact), she has been PM-ed countless times for her DOD dolls. It seems that the doll owners here are looking for 2nd hand DOD dolls...? Or SOOM ones too... I bet it's just to show off...

Anyway, she said that if we view it in a Singaporean view, well...we wouldn't think that they are so rude to the extent that we feel like slapping them. But there have been a few cases where she had been almost bugged to death by people who kept pestering her to sell her dolls.

The local agent heard our discussion and joined in. She ordered and had showed us her grey-skinned Kalix and Delphine. Apparently she made the mistake of showing to other customers and has been pestered countless times to sell either Kalix or Delphine to them. Luckily the local agent doesn't own any accounts on the 2 local forums. Else she'd be swarmed by PMs for her to sell the grey-skinned babies to them.

My theory about why people want to buy the agent's babies is because(and this applies to the debate, although it's my theory):
1. Limited edtions. Therefore they missed the datelines.
2. Expensive. So they are either going to pay her by instalments and come everyday to see the babies and drag along friends to show them off to.
3. Second Hand. Same as above about them being expensive or limited editions, therefore unable to get them at a price they're more willing to pay.

So...it is seriously NOT okay to PM an owner about selling a doll that they never once thought of letting it go. Even if they express interest in getting the dolls and that they'll have a loving home to go to once I don't want them, somehow I can't help but feel suspicious...?

I mean, I won't be the one and only one who owns that particular sculpt right? So just wait around the marketplace, I'm sure someone will put a sculpt of their choice up for sale. By PM-ing me to say how much they adore my doll and that IF I do have the intention to sell him, I can consider them as they'll do their utmost to provide him with a loving home. Sounds like some opening sales speech a salesman/woman is trying to force you to buy a set of kitchen knives which you don't need.

So personal feelings here. I understand some people do have the intention to provide the dolls with a loving home, but by PM-ing an owner who isn't incline to sell their dolls, even if the message is polite, is still er...not okay. The intention is seriously NOT okay in my terms... And...I don't know how I wanna phrase it but I guess you guys get my point.