Is it 'OKAY' to PM an Owner about Selling a doll they had NO intention to sell?

To me, it's very rude to do something like that...
I have received such PM's about my blythe collection.
And it sure wasn't a pleasant experience. :-/

 

Some of us have one of a kind dolls (for instance, my Baron has an OOAK head made by another DoA member) and so yes, I am rather attached and I DO take that sort of thing seriously. I wouldn't do so if it was any of my girls, because only my Asha is limited, but they are not as attention-grabbing as the cat is.

It's not attempting to purchase my child. It's attempting to purchase something I spent a lot of money and time getting, and the artist spent a lot of time creating just for me. It's rude, plain and simple, and "not taking it seriously" the first time may mean you get pestered in spite of your "gentle" refusal.

 

I don't think its okay at all.

If they want the doll badly enough, they can search the marketplace until they find it.

Its never happened to me, but seriously - I'm not spending all my money on a doll just to sell it to someone because they're too lazy to look for their own.

I've searched through every page on the marketplace many times to find what I was looking for, I would expect others to do the same if they had to.

 

Against the rules, so I guess its not ok. I guess I understand how some people would be offended, but in my other hobby, cel-collecting, I've done it several times. I'll just send an e-mail to someone with a cel I like and offer them and insane price for it. Money talks. I've never considered doing it with dolls though, because even though they are technically one of a kind, I've never seen one that was truly one of a kind that would be worth the sort of bribe to get it out of someone's hands. I've had many people e-mail me about purchasing my dolls, and I reply that any one may be bought for 10k. No takers....yet.

 

Wow. Definitely rude. Not only is it like those annoying realters who call you up out of the blue and try to get you to sell your house because it's recently gone up in value, it's like somebody coming up to you and asking you to sell them your child!
Dolls are highly personal, and many of us are really attached to our resin babies.
Some people seem to have a problem when they see something they want, and can't have it. They think they're entitled to have it. I'm not saying every person who contacts another with an offer to buy a doll is like that, but I'm sure some are. I've seen it before, in other circles. "I want it, so give it to me."

A lot of the time, it's not a question of price- it's just simply not for sale. I think an apt example would be: "I want to buy your priceless beloved family heirloom! What?! No?! I'm willing to pay you $1000, so what's the problem?"

I've seen many rare dolls float through the marketplace, people should look there if they want a rare doll, not pester an owner. It makes me wonder if some owners of rare and beautiful dolls are afraid to post pictures of them because of this. (Which means we're all missing out!)
If you want a one-off, unique doll, and the owner isn't announcing that they're selling- TOUGH LUCK. Don't pester the poor person.

The whole appeal of these dolls is that they're so customizable. Use your own creativity instead, and make an amazing-looking doll instead of trying to buy one from somebody who doesn't want to sell.

 

This is interesting I never knew it was against the rules. I can't see anything wrong with a polite pm such as, if you ever decide to sell your doll please remember me as I would love to buy it. I can see why someone would want to pm if its a hard to find mold they are looking for.

NOTE: I think its the mold not the particular doll in most cases that people want. Where as many on this thread are talking about the subject like the person wants to buy the personality and profile of the doll they created I would find that a little strange but I wouldn't be insulted lifes too short.

I don't see it as pestering. But its interesting to see that allot of people feel it is.

 

Actually, I have had someone come up to me and ask me to sell them my dog... I was only in middle school at the time, so it was especially wretched of the yuppie jerk.
But as to dolls, I agree with most that it's very rude for a random stranger to ask you to sell your doll. At least have the decency to strike up a conversation first

 

I agree with Enki in that the tone of the PM matters very much. If it's an expression of admiration or appreciation of the doll and a tentative offer to take him/her off my hands if I ever wanted to sell, I'd be decidedly pleased that someone liked my doll enough to want to buy him/her!

That said, I would never PM another owner about selling their doll, even if I really liked him/her. It seems a little...I don't know, crass? Even if I'd be flattered if the same happened to me. ^_^; Also, I'd rather have a doll uniquely my own...even if I do eventually buy the same sculpt.

If it's a terse or demanding PM, or if the same person just won't stop harassing me about it, I'd be decidedly put off. I don't think it's "ethically wrong", though....just rude and "tacky", as Kim mentioned. I'd probably be really firm with refusing them, and I'd also report them to the mods, if things got really out of hand.

 

no i don't think it's ok at ALL. (if it's an admirer of the doll and the tone is nice AND it's talking about if ever i want to sell i'll keep a mental note, if plain 'i want ____ and i'll give you $____ now' i would say no)

I receieved pms about am i willing to sell my El... while i was saving up for him! I don't know if that person misread or mis assumed or means something else but i found it rude and i didn't even have the doll!

If i had a rare doll or limited (very slim chance but might if Tony is on the market ^^) i doubt i would like others pming about selling my doll. I don't know, i find it rude to do so. If someone is selling their doll they'll let you know. Asking the owner to sell their dolls when they don't intend to seem rude.

Though i deal with it myself. I don't report them because i generally explain to them the reason (i.e. i don't own him yet and have no plans of selling him) so they usually just disappear.

 

It's definately not okay.... I have had similar experience with people just randomly coming up to me and asking to buy my dog off of me. She's not particularly common in the UK but that doesn't exactly make it right for someone to think they can just throw money at you and take away your much loved pet or in this case, much loved possession. It's pretty childish to be honest. These people can't have any idea the amount of love and care people put into their dolls to imagine that they'd just allow it to be passed on to some random who happened to think it was pretty and PMed them asking to buy it.

 

No. I've had messages send to me about buying my doll but I was selling the outfit she's modelling, not the doll. It didn't upset me though (they were nice about it and didn't really bug or pester me) but I still don't think it's really proper.

 

Wow I didn't know there was a rule about this. *guilty*
There was a specific doll that my daughter fell in love with and I passed on her when she was for sale. Later she got another Sist, but still longed for this doll she had originally fallen for. We watched this doll go thru I think 2 more owners, in a pretty short period of time. Later I saw her in the gallery from another owner. I did PM the owner once, actually I had already made friends with her thru an unrelated sale on ebay. I explained how much we had regretted not buying her before, and asked her to let me know if she ever decided to sell her. About 6 months or so later, this owner was sweet enough to give us first chance at this longed for, cried over doll. She is here with us now, happily named and settled in to the family. This made 4 people (including the lovely doll) very happy. Was this somehow rude or inappropriate? I was very polite and everyone came out a winner.

 

Someone IMed me on Yahoo yesterday asking me if I wanted to sell them my Sleeping Vampire Shushu. I was quite irked. I'd say this is definitely *not OKAY*. I'd almost understand a PM, but to IM me? Thats above and beyond....

 

If it's a friend or someone you're transacting with already, I can see asking "you wouldn't be interested in also selling your doll X, would you? If you ever decide to, I'd be interested in buying." But then leave it at that, especially if the person says "oh, no."
If it's a total stranger who you're not even transacting with and you just contact them out of the blue and go "Sell me your doll! I have a ton of money!" yes, that's rude in my book.

 

I personally wouldn't PM someone to ask to buy their doll, but I have PMed owners telling them that I liked their doll very much. I didn't offer to 'give the doll a loving home', though! XD I don't quite have the finances to do so.

If it happened to me, though... I think I would boggle a little at the person since two of my boys are standard sculpts on their respective sites, and my most recent one [who was a doll I'd loved for ages and got a chance to buy when his owner put him up for sale!] is not as limited as he used to be, so... they could always get the same doll and ask the artists to paint them, since both Tig and Dav have faceups by people offering faceup services here on DoA. XD

Wow, run-on sentence of doom.

 

In any case, this is the proper way to go about things. Being polite while still expressing interest obviously gives a better outcome than repeatedly stating how much your willing to pay or being rude. I am glad you had so much luck Sheri!

I didnt want to give a personal situation, but here it is-
I was lucky enough to get a Sei-Tenshi at Dollpa NYC, my Fiance was lucky and got one at the Huis Ten Bosch event. We are extremely greatful for our luck and are overwhelmingly happy to have two perfect angels in our doll family.
Once, someone contacted me asking if I'd sell one, or both because they are a great profit. I kindly declined, stating I would give it away before selling, because it was a gift.
They replied something along the lines of-
well, seeing you have two now, i didnt think you were greedy enough to keep both.
They were trying to make me feel obligated to sell one because I was lucky enough to have one already.
I think my Fiance will be buried with his Sei, it was the first thing he has ever won, so it has emotional attatchment as well (I feel the same about my sei baby) so what this person said actually stung a little.

But then again, I got PM from lovely people wishing to be our Sei's godparents, and they are.

So, like I said before, it is all about manners and how you ask.

*Jen

 

It's not against the rules to send a polite PM saying "I really adore your doll, please consider me as a potential new home if you ever decide to sell him/her." I've done it, and it's actually how I have one of my own dolls -- because the owner knew I was interested at the time she decided to sell him, I got right of first refusal, and everybody was happy.

However, it's a little different to harass or pester people with unwanted offers, or even (gods forbid) intimations that they have "too many" dolls, or "too many" limiteds . . . what in the world inspires that kind of entitlement complex??!??

It is against the rules to spam with unwanted offers to buy dolls that are not for sale, but it is okay to express admiration and interest as long as there's no pressure attached. Does that make sense?

-- A

 

Depends.. as Ashbet written..

Polite PM is totaly fine in my opinion. It's just a same question as any other after all.
People have right to ask and I have right to either accept or decline such offer.
As long as asking person respects that it's ok. Also as long it's not straight "sell me this and that for $$ sum".. it's ok as well.
I would feel honored if anyone PMed me with "if you ever would like to part with your doll I'll be happy to give her/him new home"..
Yet.. to spam with PM's even though the person refused.. it's not ok.
I do understand though where such rule of DoA came from. There're lot of users.. if it was allowed some people with popular dolls would be flooded with PM's..

About reporting it.. it depends on PM if it's polite I have no reason to..
But it's a same question as would you report any minor rule breaking you know about? Sometimes it's very hard to answer..

 

So, does the actual rule go against saying "if you ever decide to sell..."?