Is it 'OKAY' to PM an Owner about Selling a doll they had NO intention to sell?

It'd be a bit strange to me if someone did say they liked my doll and to keep them in mind if I were ever to sell them. But I wouldn't be upset or anything, since they're just showing interest. But to flat out ask to sell it to them, then naturally, of course I wouldn't like it so much. I would just tell them politely she's not for sale but I could direct them to where I got her. I've actually read a few things that people get asked that and they become rather rude. To me, one should remain mature about this sort of thing and just turn them down politely, even if it's annoying.

 

I would think that people had more tact than that than to just ask a random stranger "would you sell your doll for xxx amount of money?" Because in my opinion, your BJD is a lot like your children; you take care of them, you build a very special bond with them and you're constantly putting money into them to make them look nice and "feel" nice (feel as in the doll is in good condition...) So for someone to just ask "can I buy this doll from you?" is sort of like a childless mother going up to a mother with a baby saying "can I buy this baby from you?"
I sort of also think that these people think that they can get a good doll for a lower price because its second hand. Personally, if I had a second hand doll that I bought without factory faceups or clothes, and then went through the trouble of making the doll look pretty and have a supply of clothes, then I would probably sell it for more than regular price, only because of all the effort and time all ready put into said doll.
I guess in short, I would find such behavior incredibly rude. While I'll admit, I've gushed over dolls, I wouldn't ask if the dollie was up for sale only because you never know how attached said person is to their baby.

 

I don't think its ethically wrong. I would feel honored that someone likes my doll that much..but I would of course, turn them down. I am rather connected to my doll and even though shes not alive or rare... I would freak if she was taken. It wouldn't upset me at all for a polite offer such as "I will adopt your doll with open arms into my home if you ever wish to sell her" but I would definitly decline from selling. I might report the person if they said " I want your doll. How about X amount of dollars?" mostly because it would make me very upset for a person to view my girl as some simply purchased item. Thats my view on it.

 

I agree with Kim: asking someone to sell their doll to you is tacky, but I may have asked that question to some here on DOA; so I will apologize for that now. (Sorry!!!) If I have done that, it's a newbie mistake.
But there's nothing wrong ethically about that. I might even see it as a compliment. I would say that, but then ask where said person bought the doll and their experiences in posing, playing and generally having the doll. Maybe the person who asked you is wanting a doll from that company or line? But that's just me.

 

I actually just bought a doll this way, but let me explain! I bought the doll 2 years ago from the company (a Roono Yumi). She was lovely, but my first BJD and I became frustrated with her kicky legs and trying to find her clothes. I wasn't a member here and didn't know where to look for advice (I was active in the Blythe community, but not at all with BJDs) I sold her to one of my Blythe friends.
Two years later I got back into BJD's and in doing research for my next doll fell back in love with Yumis again. The company closed soon after I bought my girl. I looked on my pals Flickr and saw that she rarely photographed Yumi so I wrote a quick polite note asking if she would consider selling her back to me. It worked out b/c I had a Blythe she wanted so we did a partial trade
I wouldn't have asked if she wasn't a friend and when I go (hopefully) to Blythecon next year I plan to take Yumi so she can visit my friend.

 

Well, yes it would be flattering if they said it politely but simply being blunt and asking if they could buy them from you for $____ would come off as rude. Like you said, if they say something along the lines of "if you are ever selling let me know and I would welcome him/her into my family" then it would be pretty flattering. ^.^

 

As with any other posession, totally tacky and rude. I have had people see my boxer and ask to buy her, I have had people ask to buy my computer or laptop, and all I can think is "uhhh did you think it was for SALE? Really!?". If someone asked to buy one of my dolls, I'd give em a link so they could buy their own lol!

 

Since I haven't gotten one yet, its kind of hard for me to predict just how attached to my doll (or eventually dolls?) I would be. I know if it was anything like how I am with my gunpla, it probably wouldn't matter how they asked, I would feel a little like they were asking me to sell something that's a part of me. Something that I worked hard and saved up to find, buy, build, and so forth. If that makes any sense. .__.;

But at the same time I can definetly understand someone wanting to politely let you know that if you ever want to part with your doll, that they'd be interested. I know there are limited dolls that I would love to own, but I think unless the owner expressed that they wanted to sell/swap/trade the doll, I would feel uncomfortable asking about it.

 

If someone is saying they might leave the hobby, i think it's alright to inquire if they will be selling such and such doll.
But if they obviously love it, post tons about it or lots of pictures.... then no, it's kind of tacky to do.

Usually, you can tell be reading up on their posts of their doll if they'd consider it or not.
If someone asked for any of my dolls i think i'd be a bit offended by it, as it's very clear in postings on other forums and this one i care alot for them.

 

I wouldn't feel offended if they were polite and kind about it like that example you gave...

But I totally agree, getting straight down to business when you don't even KNOW this person and they're pompous enough to assume they have the right to offer a price for that doll... it would just blow my mind. It's like some guy walking up to you and asking "hey, how much?" taking out his wallet. It's not only creepy, but it's harassment! People shouldn't do that, and it's sad to see it happens. And I would gladly turn in anyone who did such a thing to me.

 

no no no no no no. That's soo rude!

 

it will be alright if they ask about the brand and model name of the doll. it is very rude it someone ask"Are you interested in selling XXX doll to me" directly.

 

I dont think its rude or even ethically wrong i mean if they were interested in your dolls then you should feel happy that someone likes them. Its just the awkwardness and tiredness of having to go "sorry, the doll is not for sale. :3 thanks for liking it though" which then turns to "=___=" No. Doll is not for sale" thats kind of annoying. and then if they keep asking that though.. it'd be more like "*_______* IM NOT SELLING GO AWAY!!!!!" kind of thing.

 

I agree 100% with this. I also think it is a form of harassment. I'm actually grateful for this rule.

 

That's pretty much what I was going to say. ^^

 

honestly I think it is wrong to approach a random stranger and ask them to sell you the doll (or other possession) you covet, however there are circumstances where things may be different.

I have had people approach me and compliment my dolls before, we have chatted about them and what it is they love about them, and i have helped them to get what they wanted. Sometimes that has ended with the thought "well...if you ever wanted to sell, which i am sure you do not, let me know ok?" Normally I just make a note of it somewhere, and go on with business, there was one occasion where I actually viewed this as a godsend. I had been thinking of changing the head sculpt on one of my guys, and there was a member I knew loved him, we were talking about faceups one day and the "if you ever" statement came up, which I was able to respond to "well actually I was thinking of selling the head...I am looking for around $X, but have not had it up fr sale yet" It was great, we worked out a deal and i know the head went to someone who will really love it and enjoy it, while I made the funds I needed to replace it with the new sculpt.

The key things to remember are that this did not happen out of the blue, this was someone I had been chatting to, they did not outright offer me a price, just the suggestion of interest if i ever wanted to sell, and I felt under no pressure or harassment through the deal. It was great, no worse than if it had come up in conversation at a eet, yes, that is because it ws not premeditated, just something that came up in conversation, but premeditated contact with someone for the purpose of soliciting a sale that they had never shown an inclination for is certainly rude (ie never had a sales thread for, never discussed at any point etc)

 

Thankfully this has never happened to me, but that's probably because I don't post about my boys much.

I think I would be somewhere between pleased and insulted if someone asked me if I was interested in selling (whether it be on DOA, or the street or wherever) probably because while I would be flattered they like my dolls, my dolls are based on characters dear to me, and the person asking probably doesn't realize that. They won't know the emotional bond, personality or storyline that went with/into making the character, and I don't think I could stand seeing them as another person's doll - call me a snob, but I like the originality of my charcters/customizations, and wouldn't want to see them elsewhere.

So I think if anything, I would point the person in the directions I went to put mine together, such as the marketplace or company sites, and if for any reason I wanted to sell, it would always be in parts - I.e., never offered as a "full set". I think a big part of the 'experience' is putting the doll together, from the sculpt to wigs to eyes and beyond - I find it pretty limiting to buy a doll that already comes with all that, as it seems to already come with a story.

So to end it, yes, I think it's rude to ask to sell a doll that wasn't put up for sale, when you can just as easily ask the owner the processes they went through to make their doll, not for copying, but just knowledge, and create your own unique doll.

 

Whether it's against the rules or not, it's incredibly rude and a great way to make me, personally, very angry. Unless the owner listed the doll for sale somewhere, I would NEVER ask. Sure there are dolls that others have that I would like, but I'm certainly not going to ask. It is indeed flattering, I guess, but...yeah. I'd be very upset about it. >___>;;;

 

I have a friend who has a beautiful horse who has literally ridden away from people writing checks for the horse she was riding! To me, this is no different. I simply can't imagine some stranger putting a price on something so personal! Surely, the doll OWNER would know better what their doll is worth!

If the message is along the lines of "I absolutely love your doll! It's so gorgeous! If you ever want to let it go, I'll be happy to give it a home!" then more power to 'em. To me, showing interest is very different from soliciting a sale. On the other hand, if messages like that are frequent, I can definitely see where that would be obnoxious and irritating!

 

Is it 'OKAY' to PM an Owner about Selling a doll they had NO intention to sell?
If it's a polite question, I really would not mind at all. :< Though I would say no. I don't ever intend on selling a doll unless I just don't like it for some reason when I got it.
Would you as an owner report the person, or have your own way of dealing with it?
I would probably just PM them back saying, "No thanks. Please don't message me about this again." I would avoid making a deal out of it, because I avoid making a deal out of most things. That's just how I feel. I'd be kind offended if they were just like I GIVE YOU _ MONEY FOR _ DOLL NOW PLZ."
I'd just be like, "Uh, no, kthx. =["