Is it 'OKAY' to PM an Owner about Selling a doll they had NO intention to sell?

@Arkady: If you ask me that woman wasn't polite at all. She was deliberately ignoring your answer to her request and by constantly insisting, she tried to force you to sell her the doll. That isn't showing respect, that's battering someone until you get your way.

If she had been polite, she'd have taken your first "no" for an answer, would have backed off and not let you stay in this uncomfortable situation.

 

I think it´s presuming Ò_Ó!!!

I once fell in love with a doll of somebody else .. i pm´d her for letting her know that i just adore her doll ( the dolls name was tyr i think </3)
I would have never asked if he was on sale...! but i asked what mold he was a.s.o now he is one of my dream dolls i maybe get in future ... and i try to make him as beautyful as this doll

 

I think it depends on how the person asks.

If they say something like, "I just love your doll, should you ever decide to sell please look me up!" - I don't find this offensive or rude at all. Kind of flattering really. I've done this before with other items on other websites. And once in a great while, I will later get a message from this person as they have decided to sell. It is always a surprise to hear back because is it so infrequent that someone will both choose to sell and remember to look you up. But it is a very nice surprise when it does happen!

Now, on the other hand, if someone would say something like, "Would you sell me your doll for $___?" - I would be upset. If I don't have a Market Place thread up then the doll (or any item) is not for sale. I mean, I would never go up to someone and just ask them if I could buy their purse! It is rude to just flat out ask this way. (Unless of course the person has the doll listed for sale.)

 

I think it's extremely rude. No one has any right to just bug you to sell one of your personal belonging that you have not expressed interest in selling. It's just something you don't do. If someone did it to me though i wouldn't report them. I'd just ignore it. If they did it more than once i'd definitely report them then.

 

That's just really...wrong. ;;
I mean...if they didn't say they're selling their doll, who are you to say "Hey I like it I'll buy them off of you!"
It's really rude, as so many people posted.

It's just like you walk up to someone and go "Hey you! I love the jacket you're wearing! Give it to me for $30?"
If they had no intentions of selling, you shouldn't ask. Just no, seriously. O_e;;;
I mean...yeah, you can ask "Hey I really like your doll! What company are they from? What model are they? Who did the faceup?"
That's good I think. Then you can just find the doll yourself. ^^ But to just ask to buy it off another person...eh.

 

Hmm, well if it was a pm expressing interest in event that I might be selling the doll, I wouldn't mind. But yea, if it was like "I am willing to pay blah blah for it" will definitely make me annoyed. I'll probly report the person if he/she was rude. ^^;;

 

I'm on the fence about this. You see, there's this doll I fell in love with (name:Paradox, company and model:BBB/RS Male Charisma) and I thought, Hmm, I wonder if i simply asked her "If you're even considering selling him, look me up" would that be okay. Now, I think she sold the doll and I'm heart broken. I loved everything about that doll and if I had asked soon, I could have been his next owner :/
I'd honestly be flattered if someone wanted to buy my doll. It shows other people appreciate your doll so much, they'd want to own it themselves. However, if the person became insistent and annoying, I'd probably contact a mod.
and really, there's no harm is simply (and politely) asking.

 

I don't find this sort of pm rude at all. Certainly, some folks just sound rude via pm....but I don't find the sentiment rude. But I also am not attached to my dolls as though they are irreplaceable animistic characters. Don't get me wrong - I LOVE ALL MY DOLLS FIERCELY but a pm inquiring about a possible desire to sell doesn't feel insulting to me.

 

Yeah, I personally feel it's not what one says but how one says it. If someone were to politely ask or state that they were interested in purchasing any of my stuff if I ever sold it I wouldn't care. I now know I have at least one potential buyer. And just to add if someone continues to ask/hound even after being told no, then I do think that's rude.

 

It's not rude or offensive, maybe annoying, specially if the doll is not a rare/limited/HTF doll coz it sounds like the person is deperated to have a doll you've put some effort to develop the way it is. But I personally think it is pretty... stupid to think someone will actually sell a doll that is "active" in their family or when they're not putting anyone or anything of their dollhouse FA. I'd think the person is new to the hobby or a retarded, honestly. Well, maybe you're lucky enough to PM someone about a doll that one intends to announce soon, but that doesn't seem to fit the purpose of the thread.

 

I know there had been a time where I answered this, but that was a few years ago, and I probably have different views of this.

To me, it depends on how a person goes about it. Like, maybe they're just kidding, or like the OP said, they're being super nice, and they probably don't expect anything.

It gets bad if they do offer 'n' for your doll, you decline, and either they continue to go after you for it, or they flat-out harass you. Then I'd push to get this person banned from the Marketplace, and even DoA altogether.

It saddens me that there are people like that in this hobby (they're probably in *every* hobby) who are so delusional to think that everyone values their dolls as expensive objects, and has no real emotional bonds with their dolls. It's also delusional to think that we can be bought because, in reality, THEY see our dolls as expensive things.

I hate to say this, because most of the time it is totally incorrect, but if you can't be polite and/or have the sense to know that throwing cash at me isn't going to make me sell to you (now or ever), then they shouldn't be in this hobby - or any hobby where one has to exercise common sense, and politeness towards other members. Or at least take a step away for awhile. I feel this is because these people fail to see a huge aspect of this hobby as anything but $$$, and they don't get that some of us *want and like* our dolls.

 

I think I'd be flattered by almost any PM like that, even if someone came to me asking to buy my doll for $___. I do consider that approach rather rude, but really, it'd be flattering to know that someone was interested enough in my doll to want to buy it.

...Now, if said person couldn't take a polite "no" for an answer, yeah, I'd get annoyed.

 

There has only been one time that I have ever told someone in a doll community that if they ever chose to part with one of their girls I wanted her. She also happened to be my best friend through the doll community, though we had met through there. She ended up getting rid of her and asked me if I wanted her. So, I don't think there is anything wrong with saying that...just as long as you aren't asking to buy the doll. That is rude.

 

Another hobby I was huge in had this ALL THE TIME. But here's the thing...they were animals. A whole different ball park, when you ask somebody if they are willing to sell their beloved beautiful living creature. However, some people will, for the right price. A lot of times when this happens, the person ends up selling the animal and making hundreds of dollars than they had expected. It offends a lot of people, and yet a lot of others welcome it.

I think if you're open to such things, post so in your profile or signature that you might consider selling some of your dolls, and which one. But if you go contacting people out of the blue and asking that, you're kind of asking for trouble, and will likely get quite a few nasty replies.

Personally when I got things like that, I would simply say, "I'm sorry, I'm not interested in selling." Or "I'm far too attached" and would point them in the right direction to somebody whom might have something similar to what they're looking for. Or tell them what company your doll is, how you got it (if there's a dealer you got it from, for example) and where you got your face-up and clothes, so they can try making a quality doll of their own. You can also promote yourself or friends if you tell them they do great faceups/mods/clothes/etc.

 

I guess it's okey as long as you don't nag, plead and/or sound rude at the owner to sell the doll to you O.o

 

Well, it means they like your doll, which is good.

But still rude. If its not up for sale, then its not for sale. I feel like the people who send those messages are saying "I know you don't want to sell it, but since its ME asking, maybe you will. Maybe if I beg and offer you a lot of money, you'll give in." I would feel offended that that person thinks of me as being easily bought off by money.

It's kind of hard to put the feeling into words, but I would be very irritated. >.<

I guess I'd report it if the messages didn't stop even after I explain and reply.

 

Well, ethically speaking, I don't think there's anything wrong with it as long as it's one message. If it was multiple messages, then yeah, definitely overboard. But just saying: "hey, if you're ever interested in selling, please think of me!" is fine and not rude at all in my opinion. To actually make an offer would be offensive to me, personally. ... But then again, I'm incredibly attached to my dolls.

 

I think its very rude. I understand some people desperately want a certain sculpt, maybe it's their "grail" doll, but they should put up a thread on market place saying they would like to buy that sculpt. There is most likely someone on the forum who wants to sell their doll.
If someone asked me that, I would either, just reply with a "no" or just tell the, to look at the market place or ebay.

 

Well I guess it depends on how you worded it, because I know I would be a little taken aback if someone just said "hey, you wanna sell your doll to me?" and find it incredibly rude, but if it was more of "if you're ever interested in selling your doll, I'm totally interested" it seems a lot more ok? Asking someone to even consider selling something they don't seem like they want to sell is super rude, but I don't really see a problem with asking them to consider selling to you, if they ever wanted to sell.

 

I don't think it is nice, polite or "ok" to ask something like that in a PM. If the owner has not expressed the wish to sell the doll, it is simply not for sale. It is similar to asking people on the street if one can buy their jeans or purse. It creates an awkward situation.

On the other hand, I have seen people (I am talking about doll forums generally, not about DoA in this case) posting pictures of their just-arrived doll, or a doll they say they particularly love, and then the next day it is up for sale. Gallery posts can indeed be used as hidden advertisement for a future sales thread (and I don't see anything wrong with that). That is why I somehow understand why people write such PMs. Sometimes, it could simply be a misunderstanding.

If I was the doll owner PMed about selling my doll (or my jeans ) I in no way intended to sell, I would probably just ignore the PM. Or decline the offer in one sentence. I don't think I would be offended, even though I would consider it rather impolite, but it is not like they are stealing my doll or something.