Mothering instinct?

Maybe to some people it can be a way to show a mothering instinct, but not really for me.

For instance, I do mother my pets. But they're living, breathing things. I care about my dolls, but I feel differently about them than I do about my pets. It's hard to explain but it's kinda like...my pets are a part of my family...I protect them, feed them, etc. My dolls, they're more like my friends. I think the reason I get child-like dolls is because I feel that I can relate better to them (although that probably sounds weird).

 

My dad said that my friends and I taking care of our dolls is like a maternal instinct XDDDD
I guess I could agree. We cuddle our dolls, brush their hair alllll the time, make sure they're neat, and try to take very good care of them XD

So in a sense, I guess I know where you're coming from ^^

 

I can only speak for myself on this, and the answer for me is no. I do not want child-like dolls, although I think many of them are beautiful. I prefer adult female dolls, because I like to use them as models for my fashions. I view them more as friends than anything else. I have no children, and most likely never will, and I'm fine with it. If anything is a "child substitute" for me, it is not my dolls, it's my dog, who I really do refer to as "my baby", and I know I treat him like one :P But my dolls are more of an artistic expression thing, not a mothering thing.

 

I think I'm half and half on this.
I see them as something creative, like a photographic prop, etc. I also love the level of customisation.
But the other half of me leans towards the cute, for sure, and I sometimes find myself thinking; I can't wait to look after a REAL little person when the time comes.
I have quite the strong mothering instinct, but I don't blur the lines between doll and human.
It's just a really pretty doll to me at the end of the day, but I have forged a strong bond with my first doll. The poor thing went through a lot of torture, but it's all ok now!

 

***Warning this is a little on the personal side about me***


For me I never have had the mortherly thing occurr to me. I have had many upon many pets. With the help of my dad, i'm now a professinal small animal breeder. But i given that up now for where i live, and i totally went into a depression with in a year after. I'm 23, Never been with a boy - and any how had the gulls to try and pull anything unmannerful with my body, i have beaten the tar out of. I never been one to socializing with people. I'm slowly coming out, but not comfortable with it. I'm too violent to have kids, plus small kids scared me. (This is due to an accident many years ago).

I have 2 cats and a hedgehog, but the friend that is always around is absent for me. I used to have so many barbies, but they stopped appling to be for they all just looked the same in the face/body. When i had to move with out a secand thought ii gave them all away to a church nun to give to the young kids one christmas. But i did miss having the silent friend around.

I never knew there was a such a community of doll fans, so i just quietly sat there in tears. My cats are great comfort, but i can not bring them everywhere i go (Ex library, parks, Shopping). The barbie i had (which i moded the heck out of) could go to those places even if i did not bring her out, just know she was there was nice.

Maybe is has to do that with fact i have a form Autisium. Maybe it just because i like the quiet. I really don't know why, but i do know i have always needed some sort of security blanket, despite the fact i'm a total scrapper. I think a doll is filling something i just may never have been able to feel for.

But this is just personally how i feel about it. from what i know and was told by people very close to me.

 

My dolls are representations of characters I rarely have childlike characters and when I do they are dark characters. I don't want kids nor do I treat my dolls like children because I just don't have that "motherly instinct" I treat my dolls with lots of care because they are my characters or even based on truth but are not my children - I'll joke around saying "leave my baby alone!" but it never goes past joking. My dolls help with writing, sewing, and are there to look pretty, and for me not really to mother ^^;

 

father (me) will only see Alice

 

Hmmm I've considered the same question myself as I've had similar thought when I first got into the hobby and was only attracted to smaller childlike dolls... but then I've never had a desire for children. I think it is that they are aesthetically pleasing to look at because they have that cute childlike innocence but at the same time it isnt because of the biological clock if that makes any sense. lol

 

I can understand where you're coming from. I just turned 26, and I've known since I was 14 or so that I will never become a human parent. It's just not in me, but as I'm getting older I notice I do find kids to be cuter. I just don't want anything to do with them on a personal level. I think the hormones are going to flare up in many women whether they want children or not. That's just nature at work. If you're sure you don't want any kids, I don't see why you can't channel that instinct into something else. If it's dolls, good for you. To each their own. Maybe consider a pet since it can show you affection and react when you care for it? I'd think the reward level would be higher since you're lonely. Japanese Chins in particular are very affectionate, sensitive, and somewhat dependent on their owners.

As for your question, it's definitely not the case for me. I prefer older, taller dolls. While I need a couple younger dolls since I'm making the Addams Family, I don't connect as well to the kid sculpts. Not sure why. Some doll owners might use this hobby as a substitute for children, but I think many don't.

Either way, don't feel bad about it. Take care of yourself.

 

Yo some people dolls DO bring the maternal intincto, to others like me, is simply a way of relating to more mature characters that might represent aspects of our life.. I do have a daughter, althouagh I am 26, I know that I dont want any other children.. I am not very maternal and certainly CANT stand other children... maybe I sound mean, but i discipline my daughter to be herself and to be respectful... I know for a fact i dont have the patience to do that with any other child... with my dolls the relationship is different, to begin with they are not children, and they help me release my pressures and my stress... i guess i have saved a fortune on councelling just by having my dolls just when post-partum depression hit me at its worst.

 

If I have dolls,I probably consider them as my brothers or sisters rather than children.^_^

 

Putting aside the fact that I don't have this kind of relation with my dolls, I do realize that most girl kids have this nurturing instinct. When we had our first barbies or teddy bears of any kind we automatically take care of them.
But then again, that's not just a female thing. Men have their own kind of connection with their cars, equipments and collections.

And besides, in Japan, initially most of the dolls were made for mid-age women and lonely housewives that wanted to take care of something like a doll to spend their free time.
It may be for a child substitute or just the need for nurture or just plain hobby. You pick one XD

As for the child-like doll buying, I would say that's just a matter of taste
I like to discuss about those stuffs

 

I can see how it could be a result of maternal instinct, I had two cats and was going to adopt a third before realisation hit me that I really wanted a little human to look after

I am now a mum to two beautiful little boys, and my doll hobby is pretty much seperate from my need for more children... however I *do* enjoy dressing my little tiny girls because I have no real life girls to do that with

 

amen to that sister! (you can borrow my little girl if you want LOL )

 

It seems like dolls are a canvas which you can paint your own dreams. I think now that I've written that statement it sounds silly but I feel like there's some truth to it. Dolls fill niches in our lives that we don't necessarily understand first hand but through our relationship with them (which is essentially our relationship with ourselves) we can learn a lot about who we are and our perception of the world.

Initially when I became interested in dolls one of my guy friends was like 'those are for folks who suffer from empty womb syndrome.' I am sincerely glad I didn't listen to him because I don't feel that is the case.

For some folks that it nurturing children, designing adult individuals with personalities and constructing doll families with intricate and interesting relationships. I think dolls are a great reflection of what concerns us and what interests us on a personal level. I just like that we get to indulge that through 'playing' in a sense. Keep in mind I use the term "play" not a derogatory or implying a lack of sophistication but rather in a sense creative freedom on a three dimensional canvas. I like to think of it as a mirror that reflects parts of us- whether that is mothering instinct, freedom, relationships, or personality traits we admire (and occasionally some negative ones too, right?), etc.

I think that's what has really attracted me to the doll community- it's essentially people telling each other 'it's okay to keep playing' no matter our age, biological sex, location, etc. It's almost like a universal creative language... when you look at someone's doll it speaks to you about that person in many ways that we struggle to express ourselves in person.

Okay, I am annoying myself by sounding somewhat lofty. I wanted to thank you for posting this thread (and everyone who replied) and making me think a little bit more about the appeal/meaning of dolls.

 

It wasn't for me, but my mum certainly thought it was a mothering instinct coming out in me. She even sat me down and we had a "chat" ; the sort about teenage mums and that kind of stuff. : I'm 16, so I can see where she was coming from. It took a lot of convincing to make her believe it wasn't like that though. I prefer the adult and anthro dolls anyway.

 

not for me... i have almost no desire to get a tiny. i like my dolls to have a sexual aspect to them- so that puts the tinies right out. XD

I do mother my cat... and i love to treat my nieces and nephews when i get the chance. but i'd say that's more of a fairy godmother type of response.

 

I am completely the opposite

 

I don't have a motherly instinct towards doll, considering that they aren't living and breathing.

 

I'm sort of hoping that my dolls will actually hold off any developing mothering instinct. I can't stand babies and have zero desire to own one. That said, small children can be cute. So my plan is to wait until my sister or my friends have kids, and borrow them. That way I get to dress them up in cute goth outfits and take them places and generally be a bad influence, but then give them back when I get bored. Win-win situation!