Psychology related to dolls

I'm 15 and in no way maternal. I'm not really into kids. At all. They're alright for a while as long as I can give them back. I think that's why I like dolls, I can fuss over them but they don't need food and stuff. Low maintenance all the way.
Also, from when I was really small I've always like dolls of all sorts, but I disliked the way Bratz dolls didn't have feet. That annoyed me SOOO much. I mean who sleeps with shoes on or with no feet at all? The reason I like BJDs is because they are more real looking and a creative outlet :] Rant over.

 

I think that the psychologist who sparked this thread lacks imagination. I don't even particularly like children, but love my animals. The dolls are inanimate objects, like paintings, that I think are beautiful, nothing more.

 

I'm on page three of this thread, and I intend to finish reading all of these posts, but I had to add my two cents to the mix:

While I'm open to the idea of having children when I'm around 40 and established in my career--and this includes finally accquiring my doctorate in mathematics--I, for the most part, find the idea of having children a non-priority. Frankly, I'm much too busy trying to accomplish my life goals and dreams to worry about having children, at this time, and even when I'm well on my way to making my dreams a reality, well... I simply don't find a NEED to conceive. (I have to go off topic, for a moment, to get the following off my chest: I hate it when people interpret this to mean that I'm "not meant to be a mommy." It just means that, at this particular moment, I simply don't have time for children, and having children when I don't have the time and am unprepared is incredibly irresponsible, on my part. I would prefer to have children when I'm good and ready to have children. And if people insist that 40 or older is too old, there's this thing called adoption. While in many ways it isn't the same as actually bearing children, that doesn't make it any less special. I would even think it's MORE special, as you actually get to meet and get to know that special child to be adopted, to bond with it, to let it know that, of all the other children, IT was chosen to come home with me. Can you imagine what a gift that is to a child with no family to call its own, letting it know that there is, indeed, someone who wants to love it and care for it?)

That being said, my BJD's have nothing to do with wanting children. Instead, I bought them for a myriad of reasons.
My very first BJD, an Off Topic chocolate beauty, looks remarkably like me back when I weighed considerably less than I do, now. Comparing her to old pictures, in many ways, can get a bit strange, as the resemblance is quite striking. I bought her specifically because she looks like me, as I intended her to be a model for some comics in which a fictional version of me gets to have many adventures and perform many a heroic deed. (I've had fantasies of being a superhero, growing up, so I decided that if I couldn't be a superhero in real life, then I can at least be one in my own comic books.) I also wanted something to give me a real psychological lift, as I admit to having self-esteem issues. If I can find my doll beautiful, then I must, therefore, find myself beautiful, as she looks very much like me. There are many other reasons, but these are the two big reasons.

My second doll, Adlewyrchiad, I bought because I decided that a doll version of me shouldn't be without her true love, which, of course, ought to be a doll version of my husband. More, I figured I'd feel less lonely when my husband is at work or out and about if I had a doll version of him to keep me company. Those are really the only reasons why I bought him.

Ever since I discovered what wonderful and fun expressions of one's creativity that BJD's can be, I decided that, eventually, I'll be buying a few more. At no point will any of them represent surrogate children. Each BJD I buy will serve some very specific, definite purposes, and surrogate children is not any of them.

My best girl friend commented that I treat Kyouko very much like my child, which I found really, truly creepy. I suppose I could fuss over her the way mothers can do their children, but that's very definitely not the way I think about her. I've mentioned, before, that I believe that dolls can have souls, and I definitely see my relationship with Kyouko as a kind of Sprit Guide in Doll Form guiding her human kind of thing. I'm even making a photo comic based on that actual idea.

So to recap: No, my BJD's are very much NOT my surrogate children, nor do I want them to be.

Thank you!

 

Whoops! I guess I'm still on page 2! But... I had to quote PoeticSoul for the wonderfully poetic way in which she described what BJD's can mean to those who have taken up such a hobby. I think this is a really beautiful way to describe us, much more insightful and accurate than the original psychologist's quick analysis.

Thank you, PoeticSoul! I think I'll be using that quote if I ever have to describe the BJD community!

 

Ever since I was little I wanted a something that I could create to be what I see in my mind. Every time I play video games I play on the character creator for hours. When I found BJD's I was amazed by how much one can change about these dolls. So to subdue my yearn to create I have my Emily.

 

I like to deny it, but I have gender issues. I collect different dolls, and while I love the beauty and the artistry of them, I can't help but think that I'm revisiting a part of my childhood I wanted but never got.

 

Exactly. That is why I like playing the Sims too

 

I think you can be maternally driven even if you hate kids. If you just like taking care of something, no mater what it is, I think that's part of the instinct. But that's not what attracts me to dolls. I just like the art and the mechanics of it. (maybe there is some interesting psychological thing about THAT, but it's not specifically about dolls) I think people have lots of different reasons, and view the hobby in a lot of different ways. The psychologist in the OP made a pretty generalized hypothesis. Which is understandable since he really didn't have much info about it. I don't think he would have said that if he'd known more.

 

Very well said. I have no desire to be a mom at all, but I do have pets that I baby and love like they are my kids. I don't have a "relationship" with my doll like I do my pets. I like to buy him beautiful things that reflect the character I see in him but at the end of the day he's just a beautiful piece of art to me. I enjoy dressing him up in ways that are pleasing to me, fixing his hair, and posing him to give a more life-like appearance. I'll sit him on the edge of my desk when I'm working so I can look at him now and then and then it's back to the shelf for him til next time I want his "company".

I used to play with Barbies all the time when I was a child, pretending I was them, making up lives and stories for them and acting them out with my dolls. I don't do that anymore but it reminds me of the simpler times when I was able to spend the day creating pretend people and situations in my head all day long and share the playtime with my best friend who was the same way. My Lore is like a large Barbie doll to me in some ways. He reflects what I think is beautiful, he inspires with ideas of the kind of world he would live in if he were a real person, and keeps me from taking myself too seriously. That's enough for me.

To say that we have dolls because we all want to be mothers is a bit naive and assinine. I don't want to be a mom, don't like kids, and don't think of my doll in that way at all. And let's not forget that I can't stand baby dolls of any kind. Hate them. Loathe them. Too creepy for my taste.
I am simply a collector of beautiful things that please me to look at and my doll is one of those things and I can express my vision of beauty through my doll.

And it's no coincidence that all my dolls will be very beautiful male dolls. I greatly enjoy looking at beautiful men. How motherly is that? lol

 

I think it's a load of hooey because in my opinion, owning a doll is nothing like raising a child. You don't need to feed a doll, make sure it learns good moral values and give it an education. My dolls just sit in their cabinets looking pretty. Not a very motherly thing ti do, lol.

 

LOVE this thread. As a psychological mentor & coach I found out that dolls (not just BJD) "tickle" the inner child and allow sometimes to get in touch with a hidden sensibility within you soul that got hurt.

Well, ... as every human-being is unique I don't like "lump-together-facts" (is this wording understandable? ... GERMany calling here *lol) like "pregnancy" at all. It might be one reason for a single person ...

 

Bahaha! 8B Thats great! lol, I am going to be eighteen next month.. but no way do I want kids right now! Of course, I love holding and playing with babies.. so I can see where this idea is coming from! I don't think I will call my boy my 'child' when he gets here though.. I know some other owners do. but I don't think I will. xD

 

Although I can understand his reason, that the instinct (the biological part of us, not nessecarely what our wishes are), is making a statement, I do believe that dolls serve many other functions aswell.
For me they are purely the creation of beauty. I do not play with them, I paint them and I spend hour and hours and lots of money to find the perfect wigs, perfect eyes and clothes etc for them. I have painted since I can remember and usually do it on canvas or paper with all kinds of mediums, such as acrylics etc. When I discovered dolls and especially bjd I thought it was the perfect blank canvas for my imagination to come alive in a different way than on a 2D surface.

 

cool theory, but it doesnt apply to me
I like BJD's because they are something you can control, and they can reflect your hidden desires or personality ^^
also, i'm quite a lonely person, so having a BJD around is like having a small friend around the house with you ^^
sad, i know... but its true for me x

 

I think that my dolls are just like my child. I like to buy nice clothes for them, combing their hair, apply makeup on them etc. so that they looks pretty all day long. Besides, I enjoy playing with them and I always want to take them out if possible. I think certain things I did for my doll is quite similar with what a mum would like to do for her child.

I also feel that my dolls are my very very best friends or family members. They hear all happiness and sadness that happened on me. Feel relieved after telling them ~

I partly agree with what the psychologist said because I am not sure whether I want to be a mom presently... maybe unconsciously I want to be a mom???

The only thing that I am sure is my life is more cheerful having my dolls by my side ~

 

Nah, I just appreciate the artistic side of BJDs. I enjoy coming up with character designs, sewing, painting, etc. I feel like if it were a maternal thing, I'd probably be getting more into the Reborn dolls, etc.

 

I think maybe people use dolls to fulfill a "God complex"... You get to decide what they look like, what their character is like, which other dolls they will have certain relationships with. You get to have total control that you don't have with living people. It's like you're God, and the dolls are your creations.

But that's just my opinion...

 

This. The 5 year old in my personality LOVES dolls.

 

I'm another one who disagrees with the thought of them being replacement children. I love children and want one some day, but my dolls are nothing like how I view children. I don't treat my dolls how I treat children and I don't think I fuss over mine much. I will fix them if they're looking messy, but that's about it.

My dolls are mostly an art source for me. I'm not much at creating real art like drawing or anything, but with my dolls I feel I can get some of the artistic 'talent' built up out~ By styling them or photographing them. I find it all very relaxing.

I no way relate dolls to children at all. I'm a nanny, so I get quite a bit of children.. It's just not the same! I guess I don't get the coorelation..