Rude/mean comments about your dolls

I'm a closet doll hobbyist. I don't tell my close friends because I dont think I can go through that judgmental phase that I had with my parents again. Maybe one day, I can be honest with them but for now, I'm just content having a community that's caring and loving.

 

My closest friends know I collect and they're supportive even if they don't really get it. Probably one of the most unnecessary comments was from my own grandmother. I had my mail delivered to her house and I opened a doll I was super excited about and she just laughs and goes "it's so ugly". like...I didn't ask your opinion thanks

 

I just discovered something very curious

So, on my Fb I don't post my face pics bc privacy, etc. However, looong ago I posted some dolly pics (of my dolls and of some other people's dolls when I wanted that as my background photo). Then i switched my fb to 'private' and anything else that I've reposted/reblogged is private. So the earliest anyone who's not my 'friend' can see are those dolls. It was literally years ago (like 5-6 years ago), and I've reposted a lot more content since on various topics. I've cooled down with my dolly exhibitionism since, so no more dolls. So, I tend to forget about what I have available to everyone's eyes.

Now... any time there's some shootstorm online, where I partake because I'm bored and stuck at remote work, there'll often be that one person who loves 'ad persona's' instead of real, logic-based arguments. She or he (had both) would come over in the comment and be like, 'yo, you better stick to playing yo dolls bye' and I'm always like... wait, what? Was that supposed to insult me? I have millions of comments in my head (that I never use, and just reply with a simple 'x D' then) from, 'female dog, do you know how much money these cost? female dog, please, I doubt you could afford it' to 'they're cool, aren't they? I bet you want one too!' But as I say, I then never reply back, because the person is evidently a little below me, in terms of their intellect, so why bother.

But today, while eating my breafast after a morning visit on Fb and another such lucky encounter, I firgured... those people legitimately believe that you can *insult* someone by saying that they should go play with the dolls... That to the 'people outside' (I say it like dolly people were a world-wide sect xD) it's something worthy of being shamed and ridiculed... And then i realised, I've grown sooo into my dolls and the bjd hobby that I no longer have *any* trace of shame about it and I just love it, feel proud about it and can't live without it.

I rarely have time for my bjds now and I hope to have some more in next couple months. So, when someone says 'yo female dog, go play with your dolls!' I'm always like... 'that's the nicest new year wish you could come up with, thanks! < 3'

 

I got a comment like this on IG! Lol my response “Don’t be jelly I got the disposable income to afford these frivolous things. One day you can join me when you’re not a poor “.

Aww I totally get this It took me a while to let some of my friends and my mom know my hobby. It’s easier tho to just hide it from them and just enjoy the hobby with others

 

Random but apropos I'm on a discord for a totally different hobby and friend A posts a photo of this weird and hideous stuffed animal troll she's getting herself as a gift, which of course I love, so I ask if she wants to see my weird little doll that I'm getting (dreamhigh studios house elf hehe) and she says sure! So I dm her the pic and she's like "not gonna lie that's really creepy" and goes on about how dolls freak her out. Anyways!!! My feelings are super hurt by this, not that she finds them weird but that she also had what I thought were shared weird tastes and I was excited to share! I was so deflated over this my boyfriend had to talk me out of my sad funk and remind me that it's okay for people to like different things and it's a whole To Do and an hour later I'm feeling better.

then friend A posts back and is like "omg did you think I was friend B??" Because apparently these two idiots (affectionate) have been switching their discord names around so they are the other person, for funsies, and friend B was the one who had the weird stuffed animal and wanted to see my weird doll, and friend A, who never liked weird stuffed animals or dolls in the first place, was just randomly sent an unsolicited pic of a little gnomey bjd. Meanwhile friend B is sitting here wondering where this doll pic is because she's looking forward to it. ANYWAYS the ensuing commotion is hilarious, I maintain that I've never done anything wrong in my life, and friend B thought that Willie was amazing and she loved him so VINDICATIOOOOOON. Meanwhile friend A was just reacting to someone sending them a weird doll pic out of the blue LOL. All of this made extra confusing by the fact that I had used what I thought were eye drops in my eye but were actually ear drops (mostly alcohol, do NOT make this mistake) so long story short this has been a comedy of errors in which no actual feelings remained hurt in the end and I made a new doll friend. XD

 

Why don't you try webtoon? You can write it and draw the art if you would like. I don't know if there are mean comments on webtoon, since i don't read too much comments after one person told me to stop writing my comments down because I ask too many questions when I speculate what will happen or theorize about the webtoon. Besides that I haven't really had many mean comments. I would like to read about bjds webtoons. I don't think you have to be great at art to make a webtoon. There are some people though who like to downvote a comment for no reason.

What's doll shaming? Is it like when people don't collect dolls and are rude and tell someone to grow up sort of stuff?

That is very rude. Everyone has their own taste in dolls. You wouldn't go up to someone and tell them they are ugly, so that friend shouldn't go up to her friend and say her doll is repeatedly ugly. I mean what is the point in telling someone their doll is ugly. I don't see why anyone would go up to someone and say that. What was she trying to do? Make her throw out her doll? Besides making her feel bad I mean. I wouldn't say a creepy doll is ugly, but I did say dollmore dolls are creepy. However, I don't think dollmore are ugly dolls. I just find the photos sort of scary and look supernatural. I think that is what dollmore is aiming for and that is the target customer. A customer that wants a doll that looks scary. Dollmore dolls are pretty, but I get scared when I look at the photos. There's another doll company that seem to cater to people who like dolls that have a sort of scary vibe to their look. They make beautiful dolls too, but I'm still scared of the dolls because of the photos. Once I was browsing dollmore because their dolls are pretty, yet they have a scary vibe to them and ended up having a nightmare about a haunted doll trying to kill me.

 

I have been told that they are satanic, that they are scary, that I spend my money on nonsense that is not worth it

 

I think sports cards, even though they are worth money, is nonsense to collect. It's up to the person what they deem worthy of collecting and what is nonsense. If it has meaning then why not collect something that means somehting to you. I collect bts photocards. They are essentially pieces of paper, but i find meaning in collecting the photocards. I don't consider collecting bts photocards or dolls as nonsense.they are items that fill an empty hole. I view collecting as healing something that wasn't met like a need, so the material goods we put meaning to is sort of like a bandaid to cover the wound, but it doesn't fully heal. That's why I think collectors always dont complete a collection and collect more because it can't fully heal the wound. If you are told the stuff you collect is nonsense and give up on it. Then that bandaid will be ripped off and spill out the stuff you might be keeping inside. Collecting is like a distraction that brings happiness for a short moment. Just don't let collecting control you and I think it is fine. I guess this sort of thinking contributes to a materialistic society. Why would dolls be satanic. It's not like you are worshipping your dolls and praying for the devil to come with your dolls surrounded by your dolls. They are just corrupting the ideas of dolls. I view dolls as innocent and pure, since it is something people liked as children. Dolls are just empty shells they become what we want them to be or what we need. They can be toys to play with, artistic outlets, a friend, a therapist, or family. Dolls can be a reminder of the past, a loved one, and they can be a representation of you or what you want to be. Basically, dolls can be anything you want them to be.

 

Exactly but people are very critical

 

That's true. Critical strangers is painful, but critical loved ones is more painful. I don't understand why understanding and empathy is so hard for people. Society says to be you and be different by standing out as an individual in america, but what they don't say is be different and you only if it isn't too far from the norm or what is defined by the norm. Don't be too different, too you, or too exceptional and stay in your own social status don't go over that line that people defined as acceptable. Does that make sense?

 

I was hurt when I sent a picture to my sibling of my dog's just groomed butt. My sibling thought he was super cute, but my cousin leaned over and saw and said it was weird. I thought he looked so cute and well groomed. His little butthole was clean and his butt was shaped like a corgi. I think everything about my dog is cute. I think his little Grinch feet is cute even when he bites me I think he is cute. Luckily, he doesn't bite strangers or people he fears, so basically he bites my sibling and me.

 

I've been feeling free for a few years from people's opinions before if it hurt me what they said about me or my likes but today I don't care anymore and I'm very happy people should learn to shut their mouths with what they don't know or what seems ugly for being different but it is something that will not happen

 

This is a pet owner vibe I'm like "wow my cat is so clean and not crusty today "

 

I still get hurt, but when I get older like middle age or elderly age maybe it won't hurt me. I think for me I will hide the fact I collect dolls. I mean i do want to take my dolls out at times, but my dog will want to come as well. I'm sure if I was brace enough to take my doll out for photo shoots I would definitely drop my doll. My dog is a mess when he goes out. He wants to smell everything, poop where he shouldn't ( he tries to move towards the streets and I'm bringing him back to the sidewalk then there are times he poops right in the middle of the sidewalk and I am in people's way cleaning up his dung.), and most times he cries wanting to pick him up after less than three minutes of walking.

It's really hard to keep my dog clean because of his double coat. There is always something that needs to be cleaned, brushed, or groomed, but because the pandemic I'm too scared to take him to the groomers. People just randomly walk up and kiss my dog. I was so shocked when this happened. They film him and snap pictures. I am just trying to keep him calm because he gets scared easily (He is nervous and farting thr whole time. I want to tell people it isn't me farting that it's my dog.) and I need to take him to the groomers.

I'm fine when people keep their distance and ask first, but i get scared when people come too close to me from past experiences dealing with racist people. My anxiety shoots up when anyone comes near me. I don't know what they might do. I don't know if they are going to grab me or snatch my dog or what. It's odd people always get way too close to me. I get scared they might throw a glass bottle at me again. It would be fine if I just got hurt, but my dog might hurt now.

I think keeping my dolls clean might be hard once I open them. I don't think I will ever take them out, but who knows maybe I will. I think my collection will grow too big and it will be a hard task to clean them, so they stay in a nice condition.

I haven't really experienced any rude comments yet from anyone about my bjds, but that's probably because no one knows besides my sister that I collect dolls. I know my parents would probably say something really hurtful they always do about everything. They might even go and throw out my stuff again. I'm sure if my relatives knew I know they will say something really hurtful. Probably tell my mom to go throw out my stuff again or something hurtful like that.

 

I heard something about doa having elitist people or something like that. I was afraid of that meeting mean people because I already met so many mean people in life I didn't want to deal with that here. It was when I decided to look up what doa was.

I still wasn't certain what it was when I joined because most of the stuff I seen were rants on youtube. I ended up clicking random videos ranting about doa or about elitist doll collectors.

For years I thought doa was a wiki page before i really decided to look into it. I only used the wiki area to admire all the dolls I wish i could have. I used to watch toy collecting videos and my parents didn't like it. My sister rather I spend the money on myself, but besides that she doesn't act like my parents. She bought me a few dolls too as gifts.

Everyone's been so far nice here. Even when I was on a nonsensical rambling and got off topic somehow ended up talking about people being racist to me. People were nice about it and didn't tell me to shut up or dismiss me, and told me kindly that I am going off topic.

I have a bad habit of my thoughts going off topic. I might be talking about dolls then suddenly I might change topics.

My sister does this too, so we've been told people can't understand what we are talking about while we talk and switch topics back and forth. Then return back to the other topic.

I thought it was normal until someone said it wasn't.

I met so many mean people in life now I don't really cry anymore. There are times i want to, but I don't want people to say I am crazy or telling me to grow up. I remember when i was in 1st grade I was told to grow up and stop crying when someone next to me was crying previously and that person previously comforted that kid.

When I think back to it I realize the reason I might have been treated harsher and differently was because it was predominantly a Caucasian school.

I could go to that school I remember with barely any winter clothes on and they wouldn't bat an eye when I was cold in the middle of winter and tell me to go outside.

I always made up my own reasons why inwas treated differently or harshly normally it was along the lines like if I was prettier I would be treated as well as the other child or if i was less bad then I would be treated well. When I think back to it all i realize I wasn't bad I never spoke unless I was spoken too, raised my hand, never did anything to make anyone angry, but well things were the way they were and I couldn't change it.

I heard of resinsoul. I haven't personally bought from them. I didn't know people looked down on the cheaper dolls back then. I use to collect cheap dolls too, and don't see a reason not to collect cheap dolls if you like them. They were non-bjd dolls. I use to collect monster high, ever after high, and pullips.

 

It happens. But it's just part of any hobby that isn't mainstream. So, I just go with the flow. If someone said something negative now, I'd just respond with a casual, matter-of-fact "So?" or "And..?" or "Don't worry about it."

On another note, I was teased mercilessly from 10-18 years old for liking anime, and now that I am less involved in it, anime has reached some level of overall acceptance and positive notoriety to the general public. So..yeah. People are just people. I just learned to roll with it.

 

More than once I’ve heard people in the hobby makeing fun of other people dolls because of their clothes, hair and custom makeup… not all the hobbyist have the chance to pay for an expert makeup for dolls, or they like to do by their own…

And the same coment… “how could you spend that amount of money in dolls? You’re not a kid”

 

My mom... She hates my dolls and it breaks my heart. Every time she sees them she says how creepy they are and tells me they will stab me while I sleep. I always respond "Hey, they like me- you should be the one worrying!" Her comments can be too much sometimes though.

 

Right, and I feel like this makes those owners hate their dolls because people are so judgey. I mean i am already picky with how my dolls look I don't need any negative opinions on it!
The money thing is so annoying, and then if you tell them how much the dolls are worth they start saying how they are going to steal your dolls .-.

 

yes, some of my friends including myself feel bad about the amateur skills for makeup… I once thought of selling my dolls but finally decide to put them away for a wile because of that kind of hate… later after talking with my friends I decide to shut up that negative comments and live the hobby the way I enjoy, not listening that horrible people, in the end they doesn’t know how to do makeup, they just talk to hurt