Rude/mean comments about your dolls

Um...I just don't care. Why would you? So some stranger thinks that my dolls are creepy. Aside from the fact that they're just a pile of stinkin' blobs of resin and therefore incapable of being anything else, (like woooo, they're haunted *big eyeroll*), why should anyone else's opinion bother me? They're my hobby. Go ahead and collect huge piles of cobalt glass or rare coins or Harleys. My hobby makes someone laugh? Well, the feeling may be mutual.

 

The only negative comment I can think of that I have ever gotten was my dad's wife telling me that they were creepy during Christmas this past year. I think she has a fear of dolls because of how she kept reacting to them whenever she saw them, so I decided to not take it to heart that she was saying the things she was saying. My husband is really accepting of the hobby and actually tells me to buy dolls from time to time, so I think I'm really lucky in that field of my life. He even makes jokes sometimes from the limited knowledge that he has that just makes me appreciate his efforts to learn even more.

 

I love this site so very much, but a specific pet peeve of mine is when people think DoA's/specific Facebook groups' rules apply to every other social media site. My favorite doll is an off-topic ABS doll, and I've had people on Tumblr and Instagram tell me he's not a real BJD and therefore I shouldn't tag him as such. I don't know if they're trying to be helpful or what, but I've seen other people talk about it, so I'm sure I'm not the only one who's had to deal with this kind of thing.

I also get a lot of the "creepy" comments from relatives, but I find it best to just ignore said relatives. They're generally in the wrong about most things, and my dolls make me happy. The only one that really annoyed me is my sister telling me my doll with vitiligo looked like a cow.

 

I get lots of comments like “how do you sleep at night while they’re watching you” or “don’t you feel like they are going to come alive and kill you?”. Other then that I get lots of omg creepy comments.

 

I have been lucky as I have not told anyone about my interest in dolls apart from my counsellor who thinks it will be good for me. But I did get mean comments when I began to get more interested in doll house miniatures and to restore my childhood dollhouse. They were along the lines of "Isn't that what children do?" and "Why would you want to do that?" But I just explained that I was a collector and did it in an non child friendly way i.e my dollhouse will be a heirloom. I showed them photos of amazing dollhouse projects and some people seemed to understand that it was a lot different than what they were use to or expected. But it was hurtful. But I just dealt with it as it was something that made me happy.

I am the same with you. I am not confrontational and even though I do have semi thick skin as I work with children I get upset when I am criticised and will apologise and even if they did something wrong and not me I won't stand up for myself. But I am getting better at it and my usual response is "let's just agree to disagree. Everyone's opinion is different and personal and that is great. We don't have to be the same." Usually that heads off an argument or drama but then again it hasn't really come up for me in this hobby.

purple_monkfish I am so sorry. That sounds horrible. She really shouldn't have brought her personal opinions into her professional career. I am glad that you stayed strong and dealt with it. She is in contact with new mothers who need support and advice and are in a place of confusion and tiredness. They don't need any of that on top.

 

My parents think that I am insane to spend that much money on dolls and everything that comes with them when I can save up for a better car/new furniture, ya know ''adult stuff''. For this time being, BJDs are what make me feel passionate/happy so it's money well spent and they understand that. If anyone I cared about would tell me that my dolls are ugly/creepy/depressed looking, I admit that it will hurt me a little bit, it's hard having something you cherish, worked hard for and love be criticize like that but realize that not everyone has the same tastes as you, you probably have your own negative opinions about other people's hobbies. Like I dislike most reborn dolls, doesn't mean that the dolls are intrinsically creepy or ugly, it's just me who finds them that way.

 

People have said things to me like: "Ew, they are so creepy, why do you like them?" or, "I feel like it is going to wait until I am sleeping and kill me" It sucks, so I try to enjoy the hobby on my down time and avoid talking about it with people who don't show interest. Most of my friends are fans of stuffed animals and mystery box figurines, so I talk about my dolls with them. They don't seem to mind

 

I don’t have any RL friends in the hobby and they definitely treat it like it’s weird. At first it bothered me and I was uncomfortable bringing it up around them but I’ve grown to not care. Anyone outside of them just seems to be interested in them. No mean comments yet thankfully.

 

Yess ( My friends mother said thet are creepy and she wouldnt sleep with them in the same room

 

My former housemate’s coworkers apparently told her she should burn my dolls when I was out of the house (she off-handedly mentioned that I collect). As well as BJDs, I have several antique dolls that are literally irreplaceable. Thankfully she would never have done that, but even the suggestion made me furious.

 

I've been lucky, and never had a friend or family member ever say any thing hurtful.

However I've taken dolls to anime cons and had the token doll phobic "Your doll is so creepy." I never had a good come back until a friend shared a meme with me that had an older fashion doll in it and two girls looking catty at each other and the text is something like. Girl 1: "Your doll is so creepy I'm afraid it will try and kill me in my sleep." Girl 2: "B***h, you keep talking s**t to her she just might." So now when people are all how are you not afraid of that creepy thing I reply with equal snark and sash. "Well I have had to help it hide a few bodies, but mostly of people that call it creepy so no big deal."

The last con I was at with one, a dude was all "That's one of those creepy haunted dolls don't go near it" talking more to his female friend or girlfriend then me. To which I was "Yes he is, careful you look in the eyes you might get possessed by the demon I have trapped inside it." Dude shuddered and freaked out, as his girlfriend was asking me about the doll and hobby all nice like. Meanwhile he was torn between doll shaming and honest fear which oddly gave me a weird joy as I made comments that made him nope away dragging off the poor girl for her own good.

I ended up calling him very rude as he left, I had a good laugh over my very human looking doll I made into Ciel Phantomhive scaring someone that bad. I recall wishing I had any of my honestly creepy dolls with fangs, or stitches, or gore mods, or extra arms with me. If a normal looking young teen doll sends someone into panic, then the highlights of my crew would incite true madness and terror right?

 

Doll phobia in various degrees is very common, and because it is so common, people tend to feel like then it's obviously a normal fear to have, and they don't have a reason to work on it. I have doll phobia still, although I have worked through a lot of it and own my own dolls now. Some dolls still get under my skin and makes my body go into "I am being attacked" mode. And that feeling makes most people rather aggressive, because their body sends out danger signals like they are defending themselves and whoever they are with from an actual dangerous situation.

Actively realizing that this is an irrational fear, and reacting and responding any other way than as if you are in actual, real danger takes A LOT of effort, and unfortunately it isn't common for people to work to eliminate their phobias, unless they have no other choice. And dolls they can usually just avoid, so why work on that phobia? Hell even people being scared of spiders rarely work actively to reduce or eliminate their phobia, even though most people will regularly be confronted with spiders in their homes.

I'm not trying to excuse their behavior, but merely explain it. Fortunately people are getting increasingly aware of not being hurtful, so I hope it will get better.

I used to feel the same way as they do. I would make similar remarks to my spouse when we came across bjd's in Tokyo on our honeymoon before I worked so hard on my phobia. But I always tried to keep it on my own court so to speak. So I'd say something along the lines of: "I can't go in there, I freak out when I'm around. I know it is irrational, but I feel like they might come to life and kill me". Always stating that I know this is on me, and therefore my problem. I was usually recognizing that they are a great piece of art, but then thinking to myself that the fact that they are so well-made probably is one of the reasons why I get creeped out.

And some dolls still appear creepy to me. But I still look at them in pictures and try to get used to them. And when I am doing doll-meets with people, if they have a doll that creeps me out I try to see if I can get myself to handle the doll (only if the owner is fine with me handling it of course). It's a long process.

My RL dolly friends are usually good about warning me if a link they shared also contains the kind of dolls they know creep me out. Or if I ask about a company that someone mentioned. That way I can wait with looking at them until I feel ready to face my demons, so to speak. But sometimes they are just there... And they creep me out. And that is ok. It's a process.

People I know also say my dolls are creepy sometimes. And I get it. I thought so too at some point. To begin with my dolls would stay in the opposite end of the house at night with several closed doors between them and our bedroom. Because I was still apprehensive about them doing a Toy Story on me and come to life. Now, I think that even if they do come to life at night, my sweet dolls wouldn't hurt me.

I know it's silly, but I am still working on my fears. Part of it is being mindful how I word my fears and questions to people about their dolls that I am still scared by. Trying to say "What about this particular doll made you fall in love with it?" or "what is your favorite feature of this doll?" in stead of voicing my own fears. Because looking at the dolls through their eyes is actually helpful to me.

My husband doen't like eyes without pupils, so when my dolls wear those he nopes out and calls them creepy. But if they have more realistic looking eyes in, he'll play with them a bit sometimes.

 

Oh, baby. Oh, honey. I could tell you so many stories of people who have given me grief about Chaeri. It's not so much the "eww, creepy!" responses from non-doll people that I care about; it's the spiteful, judgmental, inappropriate and completely unsolicited vitriol flung in my face from people who claim to share my love of dolls.

Okay, I get it. I have a doll that is off-topic for some forums (including this one). I don't post pics of Chaeri where I know they're not appropriate. (If there's nothing in the posted rules, I've learned to ask first.) That shouldn't be a license for people to insult my character, my talent, my intelligence or my skills. Insult my doll for being cheap or not strung with elastic or because you don't like dolls with pink hair. That's all personal preferences and are valid as such. But do NOT make false accusations against me, accusing me of being everything from a bad-tempered b!tch to being a closet pedophile. (Well, okay, bad-tempered b!tch may not be too far off the mark. But the rest? Nuh-uh.) Do NOT say my sewing and costuming skills suck. They don't. Do NOT say I'm stupid. I'm not. Do NOT say I'm crazy. I'm no crazier than anyone else in this crazy hobby. I'm just louder than some.

BTW, this is not directed at anyone here. I'm just venting. No one here has insulted me but I get a lot of anonymous hate on Tumblr and it's totally inappropriate and I'm sick of it.

Oh, and that whole "off-topic doll" thing will be moot before the end of the year because I finally purchased a Doll Legend Lu Ling to be the latest incarnation of Chaeri.

 

I really don’t know why, but before I entered this forum I never know of this phobia and was quite baffeled at how common this seems to be. Is this a cultural thing or got I lucky? I live in Germany and doll collectors are sometimes - but not often - smiled upon except if you are a collector of antique dolls, then it’s a serious business. Never heard a hateful or hurtful comment. But maybe that’s only the case in my little town and others may have others experiences. And I’m not very active in social media.
And I‘m quite shocked at how many are confronted with bad manners. Why go to a doll convention if you can’t tolerate other people’s taste in dolls? Not all comments can be fear, they seems even so often simply mean.

 

Those anonymous bjd confession blogs are just so immature and ridiculous! I've only ever seen a few of them reposted to Instagram (I feel too old for Tumblr).
I'm so sorry people are giving you grief like that. It is much more telling of them than of you. My Hubs has an off topic ABS jointed doll that he is modding into a youngling succubus, and we are actually always so impressed by her posing abilities and quality.

 

Bloody hell what a tart. That is next level!

I’ve had a couple friends say it’s creepy, but I don’t care what people say or think. Honestly Those that mind, don’t matter. Those that matter don’t mind.

 

Luckily I haven't gotten much negative comments towards my doll. My friends are actually into dolls themselves, and pretty supportive!! I've gotten some, "Ew they're creepy", or people thinking they're going to have ghosts in the dolls or something. It's kind of amusing, but I love my dolls so it doesn't bother me too much!

 

I hope you can overcome your fears one day I have other phobias and fears and I never tried to beat them personally, I think you are doing a great job on that.

 

I'm a social worker in residential care. I take my dolls to work with me when it's safe, as they're honestly fantastic therapeutic tools for a lot of my kids. Most of my coworkers are at the least supportive of my hobby and a lot of them look forward to seeing who comes with me to work as much as the kids do. This last rotation, my TL sent me to a different program to help/teach. One of the kids there loves my dolls so I took one with me. I was coming back into the office with her and my coworker at this place FREAKS OUT and basically yells that I "better not leave that THING in here".
I'm like, my dude, what? First of all, no, i'm not leaving her anywhere, i'm putting her up. Secondly, you don't even understand how much I would not leave one of my dolls at a program overnight.
She went on about how dolls remind her of Chucky and how creepy they are and how much she hates them. Cool but like, you don't need to be an ass about it? Especially when it means so much to the kids that I bring these dolls in.
Yeah man Sigun with her confused little face and maid outfit, definitely looks like Chucky

 

I don't really show my dolls to the public to get insulted, but yeah I've heard a few "that's freaky" sort of remarks, which I'm pretty immune too just because there are a few dolls out there that do scare me so I get it. I do take it personally when they make remarks about the cost of the dolls and call me irresponsible and that they're a waste of money or "grow up". I have work ethics and I do feel a sense of responsibility and apparently you're not allowed to enjoy life by being so. I find those people to be karens and figure they probably don't have a lot going for them.