Rude/mean comments about your dolls

It's not a common thing to do either, unless your quality of life suffers because of those phobias. I still have other phobias that I have yet to tackle. All in due time. ^^

 

I think the rudest comments are in relation to cost. I don't mind telling people how much they cost, but it's a shame that given the nature of these dolls that people don't pay any attention to the artistry involved and just go straight in and ask about money!

 

I hate it when people ask the cost—granted, I’m a uni student, and it’s uncomfortable telling people, for instance, that the dolls I’ve ordered, and their rent are around the same price. That said, when they ask, I always interpret it as them being impressed and wanting one.

 

Not a super rude thing, but I think it's hilarious when people think my dolls are creepy! If they say something like "Oh its so creepy!", I'll take the doll's head off, maybe the eyes out, and show them. How's that for scary! Of course I only do this with people I'm close to, as a joke. I wouldn't want to really scare someone with a phobia!

 

A lot of the mean comments I get from my aunt about the hobby come from her lack of understanding of why anyone would even be into it as an adult. It expensive and takes up space and in her mind, something normal people don't do. So I tend to just ignore her and think of ways to hide my new dolls from her. lol

 

When I was 20, I got my first BJD. I was newly dating someone at the time, and I excitedly showed him my doll (the one in my avatar), to which he immediately jumped back and yelled, "WHAT THE F*** IS THAT?!" Then he added, "Why are you showing me this?! This is really weird..." He treated me differently after that, and things fizzled out a month or two later.

There is definitely a stigma about people who own BJDs... I think some people assume BJD-owners are weird mall-ninja weeaboos who speak in butchered Japanese, lol. That's definitely the impression I got from that jerk I dated. It's funny, because I'm pretty sure he's seen way more anime than me. I've really only watched Ghibli movies & Dragonball Z as a kid! (That's not to say I think there's anything wrong with watching anime!)

 

Got a lot of "scary" and "creepy," and I just laughed about it lol

 

I rarely show him to anyone, but I heard things like:" Why don't you just have a baby instead?' or: " You must have a real man." My Taker is a semi-realistic grown man, but still not a sex toy or what... I always liked dolls and have a few fashion dolls too... These comments just maskes me more introverted. Oh and my favourite: "They are not different then barbies for me." Of course they are... And there is the questions they must ask: "What are they for?" (Really? Maybe playin dominos..?)

 

Artsy-type people usually 'get it' more than the ones who are not, in my experience. Also people who are involved in other niche hobbies. Even then though, sometimes they're only cool about it up until the question of "so how much are they?" comes up.

Then there is also the comparison to children's dolls, which is very common. But honestly at that point, if they can't see the difference between a BJD and a Barbie I really can't help them there.

 

Definitely had the why would you waste your money comments before. My response is this is what I want to buy instead of "insert expensive thing here". I make adult money for a reason.

 

@Rozel It's alI true! I never tell the price. I just say:he wasn't cheap.

 

My sister used to dislike my dolls but she's gotten used to them, my brother is an action figure collector/customizer so he was thrilled to have somebody in the same vein to chat with, and my mom thinks my dolls are cute. Now, my dad, I get the most flack from my dad than anybody else. He's of the mindset that money should only be spent on essentials and hoarded otherwise, so he's the type to grumble when I mention a new doll and calls hobbies "wastes of time". If it weren't for my mom, we'd have no decorations or art on the walls so I don't listen to him too much lmao. Funnily enough, he has over two hundred diecast cars on display in the garage.

As for anyone who says "your dolls are creepy", I just brush them off or tell them "Be careful, they might just bite your fingers off". Heh.

 

Ah, I do hate questions about expenses. They usually gets asked to see if you’re spending your money the “right” way. Could have gone on better vacation, remodeled kitchen, bought a nicer car, and so on. So annoying.

 

1 week vacation < doll for life that you can resell

 

I actually have acquired a stalker in the doll community. I have an idea who it is, but I don't know them at all except through Tumblr posts. They frequent the same Facebook group I do as well as here and they've even followed me to other boards and forums that they don't frequent, just to harass me. They go on those "BJD confessions" Tumblr blogs where one can post anonymously and insult my opinions, my intelligence, my sanity, my morals, my age and of course my doll. All I can think is they must have a really dull and uninteresting existence, because even if I were the kind of person to stalk someone and post nasty comments about them on an anonymous forum, I simply wouldn't have the time or dedication this person has shown. And I would certainly have the guts to confront them openly instead of hiding in the shadows and flinging baseless insults like a monkey in a zoo flinging its own...well, you get the idea.

I know other people here have had to endure this kind of abuse. Some have had far worse done to them. It's a damned shame. We share a love of dolls. There should be no room or reason for hate.

 

@Emby Quinn People who do this are pathetic. I'm sorry that this is happening to you. The thing is, your stalker would never say these things to you if you were face-to-face and you knew personal facts about them. It's easy to ridicule others on the internet when you are anonymous; there are forums out there calling us weirdos, creeps, you name it. I want to see the people who point fingers at us, what their hobbies are, how do they contribute to society and see how we all compare. For some people, sadly, it feeds their egos to make fun of others that they deem ''beneath'' them. If your stalker had a successful and busy life, I doubt that they would go through all this trouble to bully you like that. Your stalker is probably depressed or something and this is where they get their entertainment from. If you don't do it already, I would just ignore them. It's just one sad person's opinion after all.

 

People in my family and friendship circle are very supportive so they usually hype me up when I talk About dolls. They also see how happy it makes me and how much creativity and hard work goes into These dolls.
When people on the internet say something mean about them I mostly don't care because people online who bring others down are deeply insecure or else they wouldn't have to bring someone down without looking them in the eyes.
Also I usually tell the "People spend thousands of Dollars on decoration, art, sculptures etc to decorate their house and for the sole Purpose of Looking at something or owning something beutiful. I choose to buy dolls, which is just another form of art"

 

I don't really have much in life because of my condition with chronic fatigue, many years I've had in the past with bullying and traumatic experiences, depression and social anxiety. And on top of that I have to deal with genderdysphoria as well, or whatever the heck it is I'm experiencing. So this hobby means everything to me! It's one of the most important things to me in life, that I enjoy and that gives life meaning. My doll hobby keeps me on my feet and helps with my mental health. This hobby have had a therapeutic effect on me, so it's a life long thing for me.

But not so long ago I talked to my friend about Pullips, she have one too, so she at least gets the fun in owning a doll, even if she only cares to own just this one doll that she have. Besides all my resin dolls I have 3 Pullips myself. And I mentioned maybe wanting one more. Her reaction were "another doll... " Like in, "how many dolls are you going to get?!"

Her responce made me feel as if there were something wrong with being in this hobby. And for a while the thought of any new doll purchases made me feel bad. The reason it upset me were because I don't have much else in life but my hobby. I don't want to hear things like, "how many are you actually going to get?!" It's my hobby, buying dolls and creating characters is what I do!

Besides I have control of my hobby. I carefully select any new doll that I get and I sell any doll I don't need, to make room for new ones. I have a limit to how many dolls I feel comfortable keeping in my room so I'll never turn into a doll hoarder. And she knows this, yet she had to make that remark!

But I know her, we have been friends for a very long time. She did not mean anything bad with what she said. But when I have so little else in life, there's some things I just do not want to hear people say about my hobby

(There and then it did upset me, and I do not always react well to certain things because of my mental health. But now It's like I don't even care about what happened. And I have explained to her what this hobby means to me, so she understand now.)

 

TL : DR Just don't go telling me I spill my money when you do the same

For the people who get rude comments about the cost of dolls. This is my personal approach and it might not suit everyone or every occasion, but this one helps me whenever someone comments on my 'ridiculous expensive' hobby.

I mostly start about their hobbies or how they spend their free time. For example, when a coworker jokingly but also kinda belittling told me that I'm spending a lot on my dolls and I should not complain that I can't go out for dinner or whatever (which I NEVER complained about, I just mostly 90% of the time say no to drinking and grabbing food with co-workers), I compared to him the cost of my doll versus the cost of his weekly take-away food, coffees and drinks whenever he goes out on the weekend. To be clear, I do restaurants or take-away maybe 3 times a year and never get take-away coffee. I mean, we get free coffee at work, so why even? Going out for drinks with friends costs me nothing near half a doll on a yearly basis. And I'm a big extrovert. Yet there is this thing called 'inviting people over'. It's as much fun as going out for drinks, the company is the same, it just costs less? I then explained how I do not spend nearly close to about 25euro or more MONTHLY on my phone bill and that this is a choice I made to be able to save more money. And, back in the day, pay the vet bill for my dog with health problems, but I guess it's a good habit to keep. I also drive a moderate car which is low in taxes and doesn't use up that much of gasoline (or whatever the English word is) in comparison to all the fancy cars out there. I just need a reliable vehicle that brings me from a to b and doesn't hurt the environment to much. I also use my bike for everything close by. Just not for work and groceries further then 10km away.

And yes, my dolls are expensive, but 3 were a gift, one was a 25dollar event doll (that's one monthly phone bill for said person) and 2 others were also gift event dolls, so free. And all the dolls I did buy, most have the eyes I got them with and they all got one wig, nothing more. I get fabrics from gifted fabrics and clothes and sew my own clothes. For almost free! And sewing is the thing I like about the hobby and the thing I love to do in my free time. While he is spending his weekend in some theme park or spending it on drinks and food. And yes, I had to buy some dolls and their eyes or wigs. And thread for sewing. But even if I would buy 1 doll a year with eyes and a wig, it wouldn't even be close to what he spends in half a year. Depending on the doll, even in a month. For example, the theme park annual fee he pays is worth 3 of my naked dolls together, sooo...

Comparing how little this doll hobby can cost compared to their expenses when you know them, might just make them realise you're not the big spender they think you are.

Edit for spelling

Edit 2: I would like to state that I don't mind people ordering food or going out drinking or driving a nice car or going to theme parks (I love theme parks too). I just think it ain't fair being bashed for the expenses of my hobby when the things you do in your free time, are equally expensive or even more. Just because I accept them or don't mind those things or do those things too now and then, does not give you the right to ridicule my hobby while you're spending equally as much, even though the things you spend on are more 'socially acceptable'. I'm a big fan of the saying: "live and let live". I don't like trains or concerts or gadgets like the latest Iphone. Yet I will never ridicule anyone for spending money on it. Just use your money wise and don't go bankrupt over your hobby. This is for all hobbies, actually!

 

my friends always tell me mean things, like they are crepy, and hunted, they tellme: "remeber Annabel" so saaaad