Sharing the attention - how do you do it?

Stargazer, what business is it of your husband if you collect only boy dolls? Buy the dolls you want and enjoy them in your own way. If he wants a girl so badly, let him buy her! My partner may sometimes query if he thinks I'm spending a bit much on a doll, but he'd never presume to tell me just what sorts of dolls I can or can't buy!

 

I only have one boy so its getting LOTS
took em out the other day to the city! park, toys r us, and a thai restaurant
he also watches tv with me (always sit em next to me, even now )

 

I need to have the favourites system, it proves to me which ones I can live without when the time comes for a change XD

My favourites fluctuate though (Apart from my main keeper, my avatar girl Darwin.) Amongst my Lati I'm always changing favourites, usually because of a really good photo that makes me see a doll in a different light... that's why it's good to keep cycling them, even if one gets more time than the others!

 

I try to, some of my dolls with more complicated outfits and wigs I try not to touch often because I don't want to ruin them. I generally have a 'play around' doll who isn't an expensive limited edition that I can have fun with and not worry about ruining anything, but saying that every now and then I take the expensive ones out for photos but not as often as my others.

 

I have clear favourites. They get more attention than the others combined. Do I really care that I have some dolls I don't fuss around with as much? Nope. They're dolls. I haven't taken a few of them out of their boxes in months, and that doesn't bother me at all. They'll still be there when the urge to do something with them finally hits me.

 

I think it's fine to have a favorite doll. I'm one of those people who gives personalities to their dolls but when all's said and done, it's about me and what I think of them. Sounds selfish but we collect these dolls for ourselves and no one else right?

 

I always believe I can love every doll equally but I now think this may not be possible. Isao is the 1st BJD I fell in love with. He is also my first BJD, the bond between us is very strong. He’s born in Aug 2004 making him the oldest BJD in my resin team. Based on seniority and his experience as a resin doll, I let him lead my resin boy’s team. It was Isao who suggested I adopt Yukinojo instead of Reisner. Isao not getting along with Yuki is a surprise.

I am still screwed by that dream I had. After the dream, I treat Yukinojo better than well, he gets all my attention, all new clothes and accessories. However, in my heart, Anthony (Isao) is still my favorite. If Yuki is a real person like in my dream, I won’t dare to let him know. But it’s just a dream and he’s just a doll.

Arkady. Yes, if I adopt a girl, I worry that I won’t be motivated to give her the attention and love she deserves. I also think that if my husband wants a resin girl doll, he should get one for himself. However, if I bring home another boy doll, he’s not going to like it. It’s not good. Besides, I’ve reached my maximum of 5 resin dolls. I prefer to spend time and resources on enjoying my dolls rather than add another.

 

For those of you with only one doll, do you think you would be able to share the attention around if you got another doll?

I'm currently saving up for my second doll and I do think about how much I'm going to divide attention to each of them. I think I'd spend a lot of time with my new doll in the beginning before going back to my first, because he's my first and will always be my favorite. My first is a little sad that I'm not going to spend so much time with him but happy that he'll have some company. My second one doesn't want much attention from me so she'll be "less-loved" so to speak but I hope to bond with her as much as my first.

 

I've got a fairly managable collection for now, so it's not hard to rotate through the gang. If I'm buying stuff, I try to make sure everyone gets at least a little something as far as possible. When I decide to randomly change them, I find I usually end up changing everyone. When I want to do faceups, somehow or another, all the faceups will end up changing. =_= If I go for meets, they rotate based on who had been out for the previous meet... or I end up carting everyone out in a series of bags. =_=

That said, I do think that I've made my dolls fairly independent characters, considering that the vibe I usually get when pulling them out to play is a vague nonchalence. They seem happiest cuddled up with one another without my interference.

 

I'm a 'methodist' doll lover: I worship 'the favourite' and then whatever's left of my affections afterwards gets randomly distributed between the others...or saved up to lavish upon 'the favourite' the next time I pick him up and play with him.

I was a one doll owner for a long time. Old habits die hard, and I often act like I just have one doll, still. Poor neglected non-favourites. But how could they all compare to Lux, anyway? He's clearly godly, a saint, or both.

 

If these were pets or children, it would be a concern. They're dolls. A doll is an object that represents a baby or other human being.

 

Clearly dolls are objects. But every person spends time doing something every day, whether they're reading a book, watching the latest episode of Glee, or, if they are a hobbyist, spending time working on things they are most passionate about. A car collector may have a favourite Corvette, a comic book collector Batman Number One that gets read more than Thor Number Nine. In the case o your passions, this would be writing a book. Like any other writer, do you not have a favourite character you spend your time divided on more than others? Or do you love them all equally?

I don't think this was meant to be a heavy handed topic. Most of us are aware these dolls are just fancy plastic. In the event the original poster was genuinely concerned on how time was spent between dolls, the response has been fairly light hearted. We should probably keep it this way, lest the subject be spirited away to 'Debate'.

 

How does everyone else share their attentions between multiple dolls?
I used to find it very hard when I got two. When I had one she was with me all the time, but with two you must onlt carry one because they are SD size and too big, it was hard leaving Kari for Kit but I also wanted to spend time with Kit. When i had three dolls it was a little easier, I could leave two tegtehr and have one with me. Now I have 5 dolls I love havign such a big family, I spend a day or two with each of them. It's not hard anymore.

Do you have specific things you do with some dolls and not others?
I mostly just sit with them, watch tv or internet with my first two, with my newer three I take pictures a lot more.

For those of you with only one doll, do you think you would be able to share the attention around if you got another doll?
I did feel hard, just leaving the first for the new one, but at the same time it's important to bond.

 

I have always wondered if the more dolls you have, the less loved they are. I only have one doll and she gets the full brunt of my affection. I want a second doll that I can keep pristine, but I'm not at all worried about playing favorites because like Splynterhayde said they are just objects.
Don't you all agree though, that as wonderful pieces of art, they do deserve to be appreciated?

 

Mine all take turns being on display to be admired, fussed over, and photographed. The ones that aren't on display are stored in their boxes. It sort of gives me a chance to miss seeing them around. I've done this for a quite some time and it's worked out nicely.

They all get treated like the treasured objects they are, with care and delight. However, if I have a doll that is known to fall down regularly when attempting to stand, I would be less likely to take them outside for a photo shoot or to a meet. Some need more delicate handling while others can handle more "work."

If I deem something as a "wonderful piece of art" it would certainly be worthy of my appreciation, for sure! Of course, everybody has different tastes and ways of appreciating.

 

Thus far, unless I'm going out, they both move about the house with me. Ichabod gets more cuddles, just cause that's his personality, but I sometimes take James and pose him while Ichabod just sits there. And when I do go out, I rotate who comes with me, unless I'm shopping for one in particular. Emotionally I know it's just my own projections making me feel guilty if I favor one over the other, but I can't help it. I felt guilty as a little kid when certain toys were misplaced for a few days. It's how I am. I don't feel bad about leaving my floating head for days on end though. I guess we won't bond until he has a body.

 

I tend to give the most physical attention to the more portable members of my doll family (my MSD & Yo-sized girls). I'll frequently grab one or both of them and have them accompany me around the house. The larger ones tend to stick to their shelf. The smaller girls are also much more spoiled than my larger dolls in terms of how much stuff I buy for them, and in turn how often I change their outfits and such. I just seem to find it more fun to shop for them as opposed to for my SD girl or my boys.

That said, I still wouldn't really be able to choose a 100% favorite out of all my dolls. I love each of them in different ways and for different reasons. Though how much I actually play with each of them varies, I do give them all at least a little of my attention each day: they all sit on a shelf in my room, and I like to spend time just kind of admiring and communing with them before I go to bed.

 

I don't share attention well. My first doll gets most of my time right now. I don't believe that they get jealous or have their feelings hurt, but it is kind of embarrassing to have all these expensive dolls lying around (I have four now) and only play with one or two. I'm not willing to sell any of them, though. I just need to come up with a clearer concept for the characters and personalities of the ones I don't play with....

 

And it got me thinking - how does everyone else share their attentions between multiple dolls?

Fortunately I'm not particularly bothered by this problem. I buy my dolls to make myself happy and because my main goal is directed this way, I don't feel obliged to give equal attention to all of them They exist for my happiness and not the opposite way I obviously have a favorite, but I like to spend my time with whoever catches my fancy at the time. Usually when a new doll arrives I'll lavish attention to the newbie, and I seem to have phases...sometimes I feel like playing with the little ones, sometimes I'm in a girly mood, and sometimes I feel egotistic and ogle the one whose faceup I feel is my best at the time

Do you have specific things you do with some dolls and not others?

Hmm...it happens. JD - my Leeke Luke - is the one who gets a new faceup the most often - every time I feel like trying out new things. Ezra - my first and favorite - ends up in my bed the most often. If I want to just mindlessly play I'll get Blair, my Littlefee, because he is easy to handle and is wonderful to pose^^

But I firmly believe that everyone should enjoy their dolls just the way they want to. If someone needs to share attention equally, they should do it no matter what others say. I feel lucky though that I don't feel the need to cater to my dolls' whims - I have more than enough of that with real people