Should She Worry What Her Friends Think About Her Having Dolls?

I don't really take into account other's criticism of my hobby. I have a couple of friends who find my dolls creepy, to which I don't have them around when I'm with them. My family, particularly my grandmother, sees them as wasted money, but she knows that i work and spend my extra money in whatever way I like.
As for the dolls themselves, I do not buy a doll unless I like it. It doesn't matter what brand, what sculpt or size, if it's not what I want then it's not what I want. I've always felt that if someone were to criticize my choice of dolls then if they want it fixed they can buy them for me, otherwise be tactful about your comments or just keep them to yourself.
I do enjoy taking my dolls to events and meetups. I think this is the best way to learn about different types and to see what others do with their dolls creatively. I find most dolls amazing to look at, even the ones I wouldn't purchase myself, especially seeing the work that others have put into them to make them their own.
Overall, I think the best piece of advice I was given before I got my first doll was that you should be completely happy with your choice before you commit the funds to buy it. If you are not satisfied with you choice you will not be able to enjoy it to the fullest.

 

I'm kind of inbetween.
I don't really do doll meets, and, you know, theres a BJD expo coming up in my area, but I have so little desire to bring my dolls... But it's not so much embarassment over the hobby or anything like that, I'm just really socially awkward to begin with. I'm a total introvert, and I'm a bit paranoid... So anything I do or don't do with my doll isn't so much related to the doll, as it is related to me. I feel much more comfortable bringing my dolls to, say, anime conventions than I would just walking in public, or even bringing them to a doll meet.

BJD's really don't feel like my weirdest interest. No matter how I look at it, I have some hobbies that "normal" people might consider odd. I collect My Little Ponies, I'm a Monster High fan too, I have four pet rats, which a sadly high number of people still cringe at... BJD's almost seem more normal and socially acceptable for me. So I couldn't care less if some uneducated people called me weird for owning dolls. That's their own problem.

I just don't like to draw attention to myself in public, unles it's at a con.
But with my circle of friends? None of them are doll people, but it doesn't bug me, and I don't try to hide my hobby from them. If they judge me for it, well, too bad for them.

And if people think they're creepy... Well, I can see why. For some they tread a line a little tooo close to realism, and that makes said people uncomfortable. I'd love to have some friends in the hobby, but if they aren't, that's just fine. I have close friends, and I have aquantences. And unless I converted one of my close friends to the doll side, I doubt I'd ever meet a fellow doll owner that I had enough in common with to become really close to them. They'd still be just a friend in the hobby.

So... Well, that's my views on the matter. :3

 

Hi Louiselle,

I completely agree with your post! I've been into dolls of one type or another my entire life and I've never cared what anyone thought about it. When I transitioned into an adult and was still interested in dolls, the only people who understood were my late Grandmother and my husband. It wasn't until I discovered the Gene Marshall doll in 1995, that I found people who "got me". Going to that first Gene Con in 1996 was life changing for me, because it was the first time I really connected with a large group of people as excited about dolls as I was. By the time I got my 1st ABJD in 2004, I didn't even consider how anyone else would feel about her, because this was MY doll. The doll club I belonged to at the time didn't really go for her at first. But over the course of a few days, several members contacted me to get more info about ABJDs and where to get them. When it comes to dolls and life styles in general, I take the "live and let live" stance, as long as it's not hurting anyone underage or any living things.

Juli DC

 

In some situations I care almost to much, while in others I could care less

I love taking one of my BJD's places with me and showing them off. Though I get uncomfortable when people are staring at me, and I'm alone. Yet if someone is with me, even without a doll, I could careless what anyone thinks. Kinda a mixed bag. ^.^

When it comes to doll meets and cons, I LOVE caring around one and being able to interact with other people who can appreciate the hobby. I have had friends and family react kind of negative to the hobby but I take it in stride. Not everyone will like or even understand, but to each their own!

 

Basically my approach to life: everyone minds their own business.

Dolls make me happy, and as long as I'm not harming anyone, I'll do what I please. I have no shame about something as silly and simple as dolls.

I don't get uncomfortable when I get stared at. Once again, unless it's my employer/future employer, I really just don't care.

Some of my friends like dolls, some of them don't. I won't bring out the dolls or mention them or play with them when hanging out with a non-dolly-liking friend because, well, it would just be rude of me not to include them like that or do something that isn't shared by the both of us.

 

For me, I will be happy if people liked my dolls, of course I will, but I know not everyone is going to have that opinion.
If they like them, good for them. If they don't, good for them.
I'm not going to get all butthurt because someone said my doll is ugly.

 

I, personally, am just getting dolls for artistic projects. A few of them will represent my own characters I already have and others will just be around because I want to make them beautiful. I may do some photography, but these dolls are just for me in the long run. I find places like DoA and other forums are great resources for tutorials, help, and buying things. I don't think I'll ever go to a meet or have a dolly friend.

I wouldn't mind a doll friend who could help with projects, but I do a lot of other hobbies just for myself that I rarely share with anyone anyway. I won't take them out for the sake of taking them. I'd have to be taking them somewhere to take photos or looking for stuff in their size. Otherwise, they'll just hang at the house.

 

To me, BJDs are wonderful works of art. And while I love my doll, (soon to be dolls), I don't particularly care if people don't like them. I took my girlie out once, and all I got were weird looks, but I didn't mind it. If someone is self-conscious taking their dolls out, then they should keep it a personal hobby. It does not need to be for other people. Doll owners should collect dolls simply for their own joy.

 

Ah geez, there are some who just love to socialize about this hobby, but me, I really don't care. I prefer to do my own thing. I'm okay with it, I don't purposely seek out other collectors to talk to nor do I go to meetups often. Rather, I find that I honestly can't think of anything to say. My dolls are what I made them, they're kind of personal to me. I don't care that they're not based on any characters. I'm proud of them because they're my works of art. Every person has their own opinions and tastes and I'm cool with that. Some like to express those opinions and be emotional about it, and there's nothing wrong with that, but my style is just to sit quietly and observe from afar.. ^^

 

They drilled that whole criticism is helpful thing into me in College, and even before that I'd take crap because of my looks, or my clothes, or even my religion (yes, someone honestly came up to me once who did not know me but felt like informing me that I "was going to go to hell". I replied with a swift "Already there hun.")

So at this point in my life I'm out of craps to give. Not a single crap is given. Now if someone wants to really give me a valid and well thought out point, that's lovely. Even if I don't agree with it, the best critics will point out flaws in the best ways, but if it's a "your doll sux" level of intelligence I have a finger reserved for that and then I skip merrily on my way. I do what I do because it makes me happy, and from what I've seen the ability to make oneself happy is something those types of critics lack.

 

I also don't care what else thinks. Others condescending outlooks on me, on my dolls or on my hobby are the least thing I would give a cent. Just be happy with what you do, you are not to please anybody after all...

 

I've not really taken mine out ... yet. I've been in the hobby for about a year and do plan on taking a few to meetups when I can finally get to one
But I probably wouldn't take then out in public - not because I'm ashamed of it or care what people think of them (I'm too old for that - I'm in my 30's ) but more because I look very young for my age and when people regularly knock *many* years off your age the last thing you want to be seen with is a large doll and I'm just sick and tired of of the crap I get about the whole age thing ... plus I don't like the way kids are around them (grabby handed) and I live in a bad neighbourhood.
If people didn't make such rash and ridiculous assumptions about my age then I would totally take mine out and about

 

I think for a beginner, caring is part of the process in this hobby. As you grow more experienced, it begins to fade away, as you become more confident in your abilities with a brush and camera. It doesn't really go away, though.

I don't think anyone gets very experienced when they 'don't care.'
Of course you care. I still care about what people see. Since these dolls tend to be personal, it is like putting a tender part of yourself out for people to see, and of course, judge.

Remember that what you see isn't always what everyone sees. If you think your photo/face up is amazing, look at it with new eyes anyway. If you think your photo/faceup is awful, look at it with new eyes anyway.

 

I don't care whatsoever what any one thinks of me, whether I have a doll or not.

 

I really find it amusing when I'm in public with my dolls and I can hear others whispering about dolls or something. It doesn't really bother me. However, I would sort of like a friend who shares this hobby, so that we can discuss things and go places with them. Then I wouldn't put my husband out as much making him listen to me talk about a hobby he doesn't share.

 

I don't! If they don't like it, they don't have to look! Some people are just rude and judgemental!

 

Absolutely don't care, but I'm rather singular in my thinking and don't bother with others too much in the first place. Love to hear what people have to say, but tend to decide things for myself and don't expect everybody to be a fan.

 

I wouldn't spend 500 dollars on a doll just to sit there and say "well what do people think of it" afterwards. That just sort of seems silly to me. That's a lot of money to spend to be concerned with what people will think of you. I ask opinions of fellow dolly friends before buying a doll. (ones who know the stories i write) "well what do you think of this ones nose, mouth, eyes, etc etc" but once I get the doll, if someone thinks its creepy or ugly... well... thats their problem ^^;

 

I used to feel embarrassed about owning these dolls and I would get a bit upset when people would question why I was into them, etc, but I've had these dolls for a while now and people's opinion (whether they have any or not) don't bother me anymore. My family's come to understand my hobby and I even brought my doll to work once because a colleague of mine was curious about them and is now currently planning on getting one of her own. I took my doll out in public once for a photo shoot with my sister and her friend who's big into photography and that was fun. I wouldn't take my dolls out with me on say: a shopping trip or to a coffee shop or anything because that's just not my thing. I've never been to a doll meet up before either, but I'm not too interested in that. So yeah, I think once you have these dolls for a while, you just start to be a bit more casual and laid back about them and don't care as much. That's how it was for me anyways.

 

To me it actually is important to have people around who I can talk to about my dolls. I'm not an overly social person usually and doll meets are one of the few occasions I can go out and sit among a group of people I might not know a gorram thing about and not feel like having a panic attack (yea, I've got social issues. I deal with them quite well normally, don't need advice. *Shrug*). I also tend to be more active with my own dolls and in the internet doll community when I have an in-person connection to look forward to.

While I still seek approval from others, I don't care what people think of my dolls and hobbies and if they have issue with it, they can just shut their mouths until I'm not around, then rant and rave about how creepy it is and how I should grow up. That said, I am respectful (usually) of my roommate and boyfriend's friends when they come over and put the dolls up, especially if I'm not around (both of the boys don't like to move around my stuff unless it's needed). Some people just have an uncanny valley reaction to dolls. ...Though I wish I had been around when one of the roommate's friends challenged Rekka to fisticuffs.