The Pretentious Display of One's BJDs

i tend to avoid show-offs and i try my best not to show off myself because it makes me cringe and i tend to dislike people who show off, unless they've got a really good reason to do it.

 

I think whoever posts in the Gallery is showing off their dolls, and that's fine, ( I do it myself). It could be that you have inspiration for a certain shoot, or want to get an idea across etc., but what does make me laugh is when someone posts in the Gallery, writes' Enjoy' and then proceeds to post lots of pictures with only very very slight angle changes.

 

I don't feel that I show off. Yes, I may have many more dolls than some, but certainly many less dolls than others. I like to post pictures of them (even though more than often I get very little comments, for which I then get paranoid about, but that's another thread lol). I think my dolls are beautiful and just hope others do as well. I have the means to buy what I want and like to share what I have. Certainly not to put down anyone else who can't.

 

Showing off the dolls is a part of them, the moment shin came home I was on the phone with my friends who cared and arranging for me to go to them to see him.
I see a huge difference in "This is my doll who I love," and "This is my doll who's so much better than yours"

 

I'm not a showoff, except to my friends, and they aren't doll people so it doesn't affect them in the least. In fact, they like hearing about it.

I stopped going to meets though, because a few people that are in the circle I was in were. They would show up to meets with all their dolls, lay them out with all their extra accessories and clothes and talk loudly about what they were going to buy or what was on the way.

A few people tried to mention their own dolls and they would only get a mean stare right before the rude girls would go back to their own dolls as if no one else had been talking. It was annoying, it was childish, it was just plain dumb.

So, pretentiousness doesn't get very far with me. I just realize that it's mainly someone's lack of confidence or security in their own self that makes them act a certain way. No big.

 

Are you a BJD Show Off?
nope i dont have my doll yet. when i get one im sure ill show it off a little bit though. but nothing to over done or rude like "guess how expensive my doll costs!?" or "my dolls better than yours" lol those kind of comments belong on the playground at pre school. especially when your doing it just to put someone down


What do you consider showing off in the BJD world?
a few diffrent things. i dont think showing off is always a bad thing. for example i love it when people are proud of thier dolls and post pictures everywhere. i love doll spam =] (i wish more cyber bohemian shiwoo owners would show off)


Is it okay to show off?
to a certain degree yes. if your being rude or hurtful about it then no but if your just having fun than than why not? people can always chose not to look

i guess it all depends on what you consider showing off

if it means doing alot of gallarys and dragging your doll everywhere with you i dont think there is anythng wrong with it

but if it means flaunting it just so you can watch people envy you, and rubbing it in their face then no its not


EDIT: takira said this "I think where you cross the line is not when you're gushing about your dolls, but when you're debasing or otherwise attempting to devalue someone else's" and i couldnt have put it better myself

 

I am the anti-show off. I very, very rarely post pictures of my dolls unless someone prods me to do so, or if it's in answer to a request post in the BJD-opedia forum. I'm very proud of my dolls and love them all to bits, but I just don't feel the need to spam them all over the place. I bought them for my own enjoyment, so it really doesn't matter to me if someone else is oohing and ahhing over them. I guess I'm just a very private person by nature, I haven't even been able to bring myself to open up a commission thread for my aesthetic shop.

I've posted a few silly photo stories and such in the past, and a few years back one of my dolls did actually have a small fan club. Definitely not started by me. It was incredibly flattering, but it was for my shyest boy, so also a little awkward.

Unless I'm looking for pictures of a specific doll I might want to buy, I stay away from the galleries because of all the showing off going on in there. All the "Omg you know you want me!" type posts really leave a bad taste in my mouth and have pretty much turned me off of the galleries altogether.

 

lol, well the only reason I bought my (first) bjd was to use him as a display object to grab attention when I go to do shows. He's not in yet so I'm still hoping it will work. As for "showing off" nah. I will post maybe two pictures of me cuddling him (I see very few pics with the owners of the bjd's in the picture , which I find very odd) but other than that he's just a doll, not a huuuuge huge deal to me, but I'll love him.

 

I love to look at dolls in the galleries. That's one of the nicest things things to me about DOA; seeing what other people have done with their dolls that is fun and creative. Once in a great while I post a photo of one of my dolls, if I happen to get a nice photo out of all the ones I take. I don't do it to show off and I don't think other people are showing off by posting photos in the gallery. I think they're just sharing their dolls with the rest of the world. I find lots of inspiration in seeing other people's faceups, costumes they've made, props, and stories they've written about their dolls. It gives me the courage to try different things with my own dolls, and I don't think I've noticed anyone being especially boastful or arrogant when sharing photos. I would hate for people to stop posting photos because a few people perceive it as showing off.

 

I don't think that a "better-than-you"-kind of showing off is ok.
But when someone is very happy about their doll and posts a LOT of pictures, that's different for me and that's fine with me.

I am not really much of an show-off type of person. For example, I haven't yet posted any shoots with my dolls at the galleries.

 

Agreed... couldn't put it better if I tried really hard.

One of my favorite parts of this hobby is all the nice people i've met, and seeing other peoples' faces when they show off their brand new kids, and gushing over dolls that other people bring to meetups.

Even if I saw a doll that just wasn't my taste... i'd never put them down, or say how much better mine are, or anything like that... that's just MEAN!

 

Some people are into this hobby just to be 'cooler' than others. I doubt people who are on DoA much fall into this category cause we are all here as fans of the general phenomenon of ABJD.

But I have run into like, 14 year old emo kids at the mall who have BJD, talking to their friends like they're the sh*t cause they only listen to visual kei, order true japanese punk clothing labels from overseas at exhorbitant prices, and collect these really l33t dolls (*cough*allwithdaddy'smoney*cough*). And it makes them sooooo cool cause they're the only ones who do it. Then a friend copies them, and all of that goes out the window because all they care about is how exclusive and unique their interests appear. I stress appear.... so much of this attitude is posing, not a genuine affection for a particular style or object. Its all about one-up-manship, in the end. "He who has the most obscure interests has the most interesting personality". *L* I once tried to compliment a kid on her DZ Mo in the mall and she seemed literally disgusted that someone should know about HER dolls. *L* Made me wonder if she immediately went home and threw him in the trashbin cause I made him 'common'.

That, to me, is far more obnoxious a pretension than somebody who really loves their doll picspamming the gallery. I mean, we are all here on this site to look at and discuss eachothers' dolls. *L* And yes, I fear I will be a pretentious knob when I get my Sard all customized. I mean srsly... ME, of all people, owning a SARD. I HAVE to show off, it's my Soom-given right. hehe.

 

Curious... Never thought about it like that. I'm definitely not a show off - I don't have anything to show off with, anyway. But I don't think that people who show their huge collection are show offs, too. It's just... just life. Someone started in the hobby earlier and they have many dolls now, someone is just starting - but after a year or five (s)he will have a lot to show off, too.

 

Waaaaait, she was young and emo and had a DZ? She probably looked disgusted because she assumed you were looking down on her for buying a less expensive doll. She may even have gone home and cried to her friends about the elitist she met at the mall and how she could just tell you were a showoff.

I haven't really noticed unpleasant showoffs in the community, although I've heard people's stories of rudeness and self-superiority. While I don't deny that there are people out there who are jerks, I also think the vast majority of people both at meetups and in these forums are the kind of people that make you happy they share. I love it when people have big doll families, or really cool sculpts that they like to show off to good effect. Yay dollies!

 

Are you a BJD Show Off?
I show off Darry to my friends when they come over, because they're my Darry fanclub! LOL So they don't mind at all. And I do post photostories....but not too many interesting ones. I also have school, so that keeps me from showing off too much on here. And yes, I own a very pretty Shoyo kitty. But I'm not gonna be like "HAHAHA! I HAS LIMITED SHOYO KITTY AND YOU DONT! WHAT NAO?!" I'm not that crazy......and I hate to see people cry. ^^;; Please don't be jelous, I'm not showing off.....I'm SHARING! Here, you can take Darry's head to share! LOL

What do you consider showing off in the BJD world?
Well, hmmmmm, I don't really know. I guess if you brag to much about your limited or face-up talent and clothes....it does make me feel sad. And if you have alot of dolls, don't be like "Wooh! You have two! I have more!" That's rude. Seriously. And if you say your doll is the best.....it is to you. But I love my dollies better. That's that.

Is it okay to show off?
Ummmmm, not really. Unless you want to share your love of your doll(s) it's okay.....just don't go too far.

I kind of almost went to far once...... >__> Heh-heh, I basically started the "Shoyo Army" but it was ment to be a nice and friendly joke......one that would bring other shoyo owners together to be friends. ^^;; I'm sorry non Shoyo owners! =O So sorry!


So, the point is. Your doll(s) is(are) the best to you. Another person's doll is the best to them.

And hound, Sard, and Shiwoo owners.........Please don't show off too much because you make me jelous. But you can show off a little bit.......because ya got to admit, they're nice dollies. LOL

 

Are you a BJD Show Off?

I'd like to think I'm not. :3
But then again, I'm the type of person who, when I even mention my doll to some of my friends, thinks I'm bragging, and immediately shut my mouth. ^^;

What do you consider showing off in the BJD world?

Mentioning every few minutes how much the doll cost, or if it was a limited, or where it's from, without being asked. And constantly talking about the doll without making room for another person to talk about their own a bit.

Is it okay to show off?

To an extent. Like, say, if you're really proud of a photo you took, it should be ok to show it to people and ask what they think. But a shrine, or a fanthread for your own doll? Or when you belittle someone else's doll in comparison to your own?
Too much. ><;

 

I think that when I get my baby, I AM going to want to show her off... But not like, "Look at my doll, you can't has one neener neener"--more like a parent "showing off" their baby. I mean, all of my friends know how excited I am about her and want to see her anyways, sooo... ^.^;

As far as I can tell, I've never really thought of anyone around here as a "show off." I mean, yeah, there are people who title their threads with stuff like that, but since the "so you want in my pants" threads don't really apply to me (since they're normally male dolls and I'm a lesbian XD) I generally just look at the pretty pictures and don't think much else of it. Even if I see someone parading their doll around, I'm just like, "Aww, how nice that they were able to get such an awesome doll!"
Though naming your doll controversial names for kicks and grins generally doesn't sit well with me, if the person who did it speaks intelligently and sounds like they have half a brain, it doesn't bother me TOO much.

Now, if someone was like:
"LOL I GOTZ NU DOLL 4 FREE!!!!!11!! ITSA GUD 1 AND U CAN'T HAZ IT!!!111oneone!1!!"
(Translation: "I won a really nice doll from a contest and it's all mine, neener, neener!")
.....
THAT would annoy me. For the most part, however, everyone around her is intelligent and kind, so I'm okay with a little bit of boasting now and then. ^.~

 

i forgot to add a few things last time


1. saying your doll is the best and perfect.
who cares?? as long as someone isnt putting you or your doll down let them think what they like. to most owners im sure their dolls really are the perfect dolls in their eyes. especially if they customised them. i mean c'mon how many dolls can you customise to be exactly what you want?

2. posting a ton of picture gallarys
i love picture gallarys!! i dont think anyone is showing off. one of the best parts bout DOA is the gallarys and photo storys. even if the doll is an extreme limited that everyone wants, in my oppinion the next best thing to having the doll is seeing alot of pictures of it, and if people dont feel the same they can chose not to look

3.posting threads that say "you know you want to get in my pants"
again i say who cares? its not the most creative title and may not be in everyones taste but most of the people who do that are posting a gallary for their "big headed" doll. it shows off the dolls personality, and thats allowed in the gallarys


honestly i havnt seen any problems with showing off dolls. not on doa anyways

 

Hmm... I don't think I show off my dolls... >_> I just like taking photos of him and throwing them all on Deviantart (well, not ALL of them. I'm a terrible photographer so I make a load of duds...) I'd probably act the same way if I liked (and had) children and took photos of my kids... Weird that I'm opposed to vacation photos but obsessed with recording Saif's "life" for antiquity...

I don't really know what I would count as an irritating amount of showing off. Probably when it gets to putting other people down or treating one's dolls as greater than the second coming of Christ (or religious equivalent... or aetheistic equivalent... whatever, you get what I mean)...

 

My sentiments exactly. I also think that there is a big difference between pride of ownership and showing off or bragging. Most of us know the difference. And while it may be true that a small percentage of people honestly don't know that their actions are being perceived as showing off, I do believe that quite a few of them know what they are doing and don't care. Fortunately, I don't think that many of the denizens of DoA are like that!

I also agree with Elfmoon that I find it objectionable when someone makes a snarky comment about someone else's creation and, unfortunately, I have seen that happen here. Someone had created an outfit for their dolly that they were quite proud of and one commenter took it upon his/herself to note that while there were some historical inaccuracies in the costume, they would refrain from pointing them out and instead only focus on what the creator got right. . Now, perhaps that person was just oblivious to how rude that sounded but it struck me as more of a deliberate passive-aggressive insult.