Things that annoy you... *Rant Thread*

I feel like I’m having trouble getting my point across orz Like, I don’t disagree with the things that have been said here. I’m not saying there are no problems with the original post. I’m asking why so many people felt the need to jump on it. Like, I feel like in a perfect world we could look at posts like that and think “you know, that kind of implicates me, but I get where that person is coming from, so that’s a valid point.” You know? And I’m talking about a thing that happens a lot… Repeatedly in this community it seems like when someone makes a post about any sort of ‘ism’ there’s a flock of people to nitpick it while ignoring the basic underlying message, you know? I think the basic underlying message was “sometimes the bjd hobby isn’t very great with race and that annoys me” rather than all the slew of things we’ve been talking about instead.


As for the racism thing, I’m sorry I came off as America-centric, but I do think this is a problem just about anywhere you go to varying degrees. Racism, and other isms, are typically frowned upon to some degree, but I feel like our desire to distance ourselves from those things is counterproductive. It allows you to fall into the trap of “oh, other people are racist, not me” instead of looking at yourself critically. I don’t think everybody is a neo-nazi, but I do think most people’s world-views have been molded by their individual culture, and most cultures are problematic in their own ways. So I do think most people are racist, and whatever-ist, in the everyday sort of way, not necessarily meaning any ill-will but nevertheless not recognizing their own unique set of privileges over other people. It’s not hatred, but ignorance, and both of those are what perpetuate –isms in a structured form, you know?


So I guess what I’m saying is when I see a big group of people shutting down posts like mermaids’, I get this feeling of why does this have to be an argument instead of an opportunity for thinking of myself critically and acknowledging this person’s point of view on this? It’s the knee-jerk reaction of “nope, this person is wrong!” that bothers me.

Also I feel like there's been a tone issue in this conversation or something? Like, sorry if my tone has come off as short-tempered, that's not how I've been reading it lol... /paranoid

Also also I've been wanting to say to Silk that I really like your dolls lmao

As for keeping this on-topic, another rant: When the eye-putty sticks to my hand when I'm repositioning eyes, so the eye just goes where my finger goes... nnnooooo... I just really hate eyes ok

 

I think the visceral reactions people are displaying on a thread that should be silly fun, indicates that being called racist IS offensive, no matter where you are from.

Thank you, this times a thousand. There is a difference between expecting a media giant like Disney (which makes a fortune and has an enormous amount of influence) to display diversity in their characters, vs. expecting a private doll collector to do the same. Not having racial diversity among your own dolls does not make someone racist. I mean, where would you draw the line, considering the sheer number of ethnic groups out there?

People are jumping on this because calling someone "racist" is a very serious accusation, and you either don't understand that, or you need to use a different word. "Racist" means you believe a certain race (probably your own) is superior to another. Are you really suggesting that if someone has no tan dolls, that means they consider light skinned people to be superior?


Um, anyway. A rant. I wish more companies would provide detailed posing photos for their bodies. Even posing videos would be great!

 

All that. And I'd reply to some of the opposition, but I honestly feel it would be too far off topic for this thread, and likely would just get misinterpreted anyway. So, more rants! (that have nothing to do with anyone else's post in this thread!):
Not being able to have a ridiculously large variety of eyes and wigs to try on a doll before committing to buying only ONE!
That doll meets are not happening around me basically every week. lol
I'm not happy with my face-ups. They're not BAD , but I NEED them to be 100% awesome.
The lack of resin choices in many companies.
Hybrid difficulties.
Not being able to do face-ups in Buffalo's 6 month winter due to the cold.
The lack of fantasy parts in most companies.
Personal guilt over collecting expensive dolls vs. donating all my money to less fortunate peoples.
My favorite dealer doesn't carry EVERY doll brand.
Not being able to find a 1/4 bazooka.

 

I personally think this was because of two reasons:
1. As some already mentioned, this was one of the first specific posts that was directly about a majority of the people on this board. Instead of a more general "I dislike bullies" (which could apply to anyone), this was specifically about people with mostly NS or FS dolls in their collection. This is a hobby. It is supposed to be a safe place where one can escape the daily realities and suddenly there's the possibility you might be judged on the number of colored dolls you do or do not own. I'm not surprised people acted defensively. (although I also think that the replies that gave reasons have been very rational and calm)
2. Racism does not apply here. Aside from the fact that it is harder to find a sculpt with a darker skin color and that, until recently, tan dolls hardly even existed, having preferences is not wrong. If I dislike blue eyes in dolls (which I do by the way ), that doesn't mean that I'm going to discriminate every blue-eyed person in my neighborhood. The two do often don't co-relate.

But, now you are talking about two different things. Not knowing something isn't racism. Not even if you unwittingly support a spiteful system when acting in your ignorance. To be racist, or discriminatory in another way, there has to be a level of malice AND intent. Like all other forms of abuse, it is about purposefully creating inequality, seeing someone as inferior to you. I can tell you that I don't know anything about the majority of cultures in this world. That does not mean that I think they are 'dumb', or 'beneath me'. And so, when I unknowingly do something that is offensive to someone, due to their culture, I'm not a racist. I'm just ignorant. Now, if I would do the same thing again after that person told me how it made them feel, we're going into a whole different territory.

tl;dr
Someone's intent (or the intent behind a system) is what makes things racist. Not the lack of knowledge.

This, especially when the box is dropped off at my neighbor's place, because it makes it much harder for me to proof the potential damage of the product inside happened in transit.


And now some of my own rants:

- The lack of options when searching for certain historical clothing-styles, especially outfits for the 'common' man. There are plenty of high-society dresses, but I'm looking for things a lower class person would wear.

- Someone already mentioned this: But shoes looking too bulky. Maybe I'm looking in the wrong places, but when looking for my Mini, all I can find are either plain looking shoes, or shoes with massive soles. I'm looking for elegant looking shoes for women. (not girls )

- My own inability to take beautiful pictures is what bugs me too. Especially when I'm looking at someone else's photoshoot and I keep wondering how the heck they were able to get that lighting so perfect!

 

All of the above. I do not think a large percentage of people are racist. I do think though that many are ignorant of other cultures (and i'm sure I am one of them) and may inadvertently insult or offend another. As Silk pointed out though it is what you do after being corrected that is important. I do not think being called out over your resin color choice in your doll collection is likely to make someone think critically about themselves. Many would just see it as a personal attack and this can be very hurtful.
I have a mixture of colored dolls ranging from white to dark tan but it has nothing to do with my views on diversity it is that those dolls suited the characters I had in mind for them. So likewise someone with many colored dolls could still be racist against those of different ethnicity and another who has dolls of one color may not be. What i'm trying to say is that for many our doll collections are not always an accurate reflection of our views on the greater issues in the world so judging someone like this is pointless.

Back to the general rants I get so annoyed when I think I have taken some ok pictures only to find out that on closer inspection something I did not notice such as a slightly detached eyelash or some stray hairs across the face ruin the photo. My vision is not as good as it once was!

 

Waiting. I'm starting to seriously HATE waiting. Even when you buy a doll second hand you have to WAIT, unless you're buying from your own country. You have to wait for it to arrive in your home country. Then you have to wait for it to get through customs. THEN you have to wait for customs to contact you and then, you have to wait until you finally have time to pick it up at customs yourself. Or wait about twice the time it took the doll/doll parts from the country of origin to your country for customs to process it if you decide to send them the paperwork instead of picking it up yourself. (No kidding. I once checked it. Time it takes for a doll shipped from Japan to arrive in Germany: Two days. Time it takes customs to send your doll to you after you've sent them the paper work via mail: Two WEEKS!)

Even worse when you're buying a doll straight from the company because then, you have to wait even longer for it to be manufactured and stuff. And it doesn't stop with dolls. Same with doll clothes, doll shoes, doll wigs ... *headwall* I want my stuff NOW!!! *whine*

 

Khell your waiting rant....beautiful. I know the wait's a necessary part but it's still annoying!

I thought hard about my rant with the hobby. Buyers that don't read your thread and ask for things you specifically said were not up for debate. I try very hard to make my terms and conditions very clear and then to have someone ask a question that was very clearly answered in the thread (asking for trade when It said no, haggling when the price is firm, etc) I really want to ask if they have trouble with reading comprehension. Comprehension can be worked on but there's no fixing the brattiness of reading, understanding, and asking anyway.

 

About customs: When the postman delivers your package, tells you there are custom charges to be paid, and then there is no other way than to pay in cash. Without change.

It's 2015, people. Why doesn't customs send me an email or message, before the package is being delivered so I would know how much I owe them? Why are there no other payment options? And most importantly: If you want customers to pay in cash, make sure you're able to give the correct change. The chances for me to hand over the exact amount of €106,34 are slim to none.

 

Glass eyes that are a very different color in person than they were in the pictures. I've been trying to replace my first doll's original acrylic eyes with glass, and I'm on my THIRD pair (from three different places! ) of eyes that looked like the perfect shade of blue in the website photos but not right at all when I got them. All I want is a bright but still realistic light blue. I've gotten dark dark slate blue, a blue so pale it was almost white and more lavender than blue... everything but what I wanted/expected. At this point I'm just wondering how many more pairs I'll have to try before I find some that are the right color...

 

Ooooooh yes, THIS SO MUCH!!! At least, customs has arrived in the 21st century insofar that you can MAIL them the paperwork (read: PayPal payment screenshot) and you can pay with your debit card. And if you pay in cash, they do have change. But when the mailman delivers your package - DHL, in my case - no chance. You need cash and you need the EXACT amount, at least here in the city.

 

I've only had to pay (in exact change *rolls eyes*) at the door once. All other times, I had to schlep my butt to the post office to get my package. And one time, they wouldn't let me put the Customs fees on my CC!

 

I have a new one this morning: Ordering a supposedly in-stock item only to get an email saying it's out of stock. Even worse when it's for someone in a GO and the only options are 'pick new products for the same price' or 'store credit'

 

This. Although, to be fair, the doll whose eyes I'm trying to replace with glass has acrylics that aren't exactly blue, but they aren't quite purple. And my monitor is good, but it doesn't exactly show colors true to life.

Speaking of eyes - when the eye putty sticks to your hand and not the resin. I'll be merely trying to reposition an eye so someone isn't looking at their nose/the wall/the ceiling/whatever and I end up with an eyeball stuck to my hand and an eyeless doll.

 

I'm with Khell on the dreaded WAIT. I'm just plain tired of it! I know it's part of the hobby, but it seems to be getting longer, and longer. Or my patience is shorter? I'm currently waiting for a doll order, that has not even been sent to the company yet, as it's through a dealer. So I guess it's the pre-order of the order? Whatever, it's another couple weeks added on....
I thankfully don't have to deal with customs! I think if I had to deal with that too, that would be it for me, and I'd quit the hobby.

Which brings me to another pet peeve: the cost! I just can't keep up with 'inflation' (or whatever causes the prices to increase).

 

Did you check out Kanis Augen? A German glass eye manufacturer, they have a very nice, very light but still realistic blue eyes in their iris rim category - the ice blue ones. I have them myself. Kanis Augen generally has very nice, realistic eyes.

 

I've got a new one for myself, which is lack of communication from sellers. And I'm not talking Marketplace sellers here; I've been trying to get information on a doll I'd like to purchase from what is apparently the ONLY dealer for this company for a week, with absolutely no response at all. I hate to admit it, but I've reached the point of switching from repeated polite requests to tersely worded insistence that they respond. Worse, I've bought from this dealer before, and had fast communication and my requests were handled very graciously--yet this time, it's like no one's even home at all. I've gotten nothing from them in a full, non-holiday week; this is ridiculous.

 

Is there no way to buy directly from the company? I always feel that bad communication skills (or complete lack thereof in this case) is a warning sign. Although, it could just be a bad week for them.

 

I'm hoping there might be, since at this point, unless I get an extremely apologetic reply from them about why they've left all my messages unanswered so far, I'm very hesitant to order from them. If it's my only option, it's going to be a major quandary of whether or not I can find a second doll that fits the character I'm aiming for as much as this first one did...

 

Thanks, Khell! I just looked up those eyes and the ice blue you mentioned look exactly like what I want. And I have much more hope they'll look like the pictures since they're being recommended by someone who actually has them! I'm going to try those next.

 

My rant is head cap magnets that are so strong they pull each other out of the sockets. And then of course the pain of trying to attach them because of course they always reverse themselves and get stuck some how.