What to do when your parents don't "like" your dolls?

Your mom sounds like my mom LOL. She asked me one weekend what I was doing and I told her I was photographing my dolls, and she laughed and said "Maybe I should get out my crayons!" It wasn't very funny to me, but I just let it go. I don't think she means to hurt my feelings, and she admits that she doesn't understand why I would ever collect things. To each their own. I live on my own now, but when I did live at home I kept my BJDs in their boxes in my room. I'd take them out and play with them with my door shut because my parents have dogs and I didn't want them to bother my dolls, so she never saw them anyways.

 

They think most of mine are weird (since I love all the fantasy-type and anthros) but mum is fine with it since she can see it's something I enjoy doing and that I'm not buying 100 of them a week and did wish I bought more human ones lol

 

I don't live at home, haven't lived at home for ages, and was well-past moved out when I first discovered the hobby. That said, my stepmother collects Mme Alexander dolls herself, so she has no problem with the hobby at all, other than identifying male dolls when I bring one around where she can see it. (Her Mme Alexanders are all little girls, with basically the same face, so I suspect it's more a matter of not registering there might be male options than of honestly misgendering them.) My dad doesn't really care at all, since I am an adult and am spending my own money on them, and I'm clearly not having trouble managing my living expenses so he can't frown on my hobbies.

Had I started at home, it's very likely they wouldn't have minded too much, as long as I paid for them myself. I always had a collection of fragile "curio" figures around, starting from when I was a very small child, and was good at handling delicate objects. It might've been a tough sell on the prices, and I'm sure I wouldn't have had any of the Sooms or FairyLands I have right now, but it's possible that, with the right marketing of the hobby, I could have convinced them to go along with it back then. There's no one "right" or "wrong" way to approach it, however; it's all about what works best with your own parents. But I really do think my mom would have loved them, and my dad probably would have gone with the same general disinterest he has now.

(Of course, that's ignoring the fact that the hobby literally didn't exist when I was still living at home and a minor.)

 

My parents pretty much don't care. They think I am crazy for having such an expensive hobby but they actually like Reito. And I guess they'll like all my future dolls as well. Hopefully.
And even if they hadn't liked Reito and won't like my future dolls I wouldn't care much. It's my hobby and it makes me happy~ And that's the most important thing I guess, that I do something that makes me happy, no matter what others think about it~

 

I don't live with my mom, but it makes me a bit sad that my she dislikes them because we normally get to share a lot of our different projects. We both love all kinds of meduims and usually talk alot about our current projects. Unfortunately she really dislikes the way the joints on BJD look. She loves my other art dolls but said BJD look like "chopped up people" D:
Unlike a lot of parents, her issue is aesthetics and not money. T^T

 

I also started in this hobby at 15, and actually my Dad bought me my first BJD as a gift. So my parents didn't mind too much. Although when I wanted more, he put his foot down and told me I'd have to buy the rest myself. XD

Which, by the way, I did when I was old enough to do so. While my Dad doesn't seem to care one way or another, my Mom is now also in the hobby. I guess I'm pretty blessed. ^^;; Of course my Dad is the guy who collected comics, video games, and baseball cards...and my Mom still collects various things so I suppose it runs in the family.

That said, if I was in your situation, I just wouldn't mention it to them if I didn't absolutely have to. I think it's great that you're able to save up and buy BJDs yourself! It's better that you're spending money on BJDs that tend to hold value rather than some other stuff or something like drugs... Sometimes I think parents simply worry their children won't make it in the "adult world." I don't think they realize you're already on your way to making it on your own.

 

My parents hate how expensive they are, and my dad is really negative about them all the time. However, I am an adult and they know they can do little to influence me other wise. I just argue the point that "Would you rather I spend the money on alcohol/cigarettes/etc?" This is a hobby - dad spends quite a bit of money on all the hobby-based things he buys, so does my mum. I guess it's just because I was never into dolls as a kid.

 

Go on with my life, if I'm working and buying my dolls my parents don't any say so if you ask me.

 

My mum loves the dolls but can't get past the price tags but it isn't a problem. Dad doesn't know but he wouldn't be bothered by them I don't think

 

My parents view them as a pointless waste of money, but by this point we've been through so much with them lashing out when they don't understand something about me and it ending badly that I guess I'm a little lucky because I know they won't push the point, so I don't really have to worry too much about defending my getting into the hobby.
Life is short and stressful and complicated, having something uncomplicated that makes you happy is important. You're the only one who knows how these dolls make you feel and how important that is to you, so yours is the only opinion on the matter that holds any weight. Just so long as you're not neglecting other aspects of your life to feed this one, if it's not hurting anyone, no worries right?

 

Maybe showing your dad some of your doll photography and letting him know how happy it makes you will help. He may never really 'like' your doll but he might be more accepting when he knows how much joy it brings, and how it nurtures your creativity.

 

I do get some funny looks too. But mine are very open minded so i am sure they will get used to it. I always loved dollhouse and such cute little thing. I might get my Mum to saw some cushion to store my dolls very soon.

 

I remind myself that my parents have zero creativity or hobbies, and that my mom once said she doesn't even understand how anyone enjoys sci fi/fantasy. Their lack of imagination makes it easy for me to say my dolls' appeal probably just goes right over their head. Do wish they'd stop constantly reaffirming that I could "probably resell them to get money back eventually" though.

 

Pffttt....wouldnt be the first time they don't like something about me

 

when i got back into the hobby at the start of the year i bought two dolls(one from Iplehouse and one from Ringdoll) and my dad was not pleased,
he thought they where a waste of money and would end up just sitting on a shelf.
i couldn't even talk about the dolls in the same room as him with out him throwing a little hissy fit and making me feel bad about buying them.
though i think at first he was just very weary of me spending so much money on something that he though i bought on a whim/spur of the moment
and just acted out a little.
his opinion has drastically changed over the last few months and he now like's that they make me happy, that this hobby is another way
for me to be creative, and he actually enjoys listening to me talk about my dolls, the character they represent and the world they help me create.
he even bought me my Iplehouse Bliss Astrid.

what i find now is that i have to be honest with him about the dolls i'm buying and even when he said that Astrid should be the last doll I buy for a while
he has be a-ok with me buying another doll as i told him about it instead of just buying it and having to explain when it show up.
though he has been asking when i think i'll be done buying dolls and i gave him the very honest answer that their are only three more character i have to buy dolls for
but that might not be the end of my collection but i wont have to many that i can't name each off the top of my head

my mum on the other hand has always encouraged me in the hobby *cough*Enabler*cough* XD
she was the one that convinced me to get the two dolls at the same time instead of only buying the Iplehouse one
(though i kinda regret the Ringdoll Lucifer as i am still waiting for him)

 

Luckily I am old enough where my parents have no say in how I spend my money. But my parents do like my dolls.

 

If you're old enough to earn your own money then it's no one's say on what you spend your money on.

 

My parents are the same way. They already question my spendings on reptiles and now I'm into dolls... oh, jesus. But, as I sort of shyly mumbled to them, it's not their money that's being spent. I think that's an important point. If you're making your own money, no one has the right to tell you what to spend it on, so long as you're spending it on legal things. My parents thought the dolls are some weird second childhood phase, until I started explaining backstories to mom. The second she heard about the characters, she wrote it off as a crazy author thing, and decided it was harmless enough.

 

Hello! I was wondering if anyone else has run into this problem where their parents don't approve of them spending the money that they earned on BJDs? What did you do about it? Did you convince them, or ignore them and go about your merry doll-collecting? My dad doesn't particularly care, the main issue is with my mother. But, I've always had certain issues with her.

What would you do?

 

Depends if you're still dependent on your parent in some way (like living with them), if not, she can disapprove as much as she likes, it's none of her business.

If you are still dependent on them then it might be wise to downplay the dolls until you're more independent.

Teddy