When Excitement becomes annoying (-.-)'''

This is actually rather interesting. I RP with my roomie, who got me into dolls. Almost all of our dolls are manifestations of RP characters. However, our characters are always kept autonomous. This one is mine, that one is hers, and we discuss plot together and let the characters themselves determine what happens. So, there's never really been any question as to what we can do with each doll, as we never swap character controls.

A few friends of mine have suggested changes to my doll's appearance, but I don't mind that if it's in character and my decisions at the time were in character (they didn't like her wigs, as they were "too poofy"--I was given a day-wear sleeker wig for my birthday by my roomie (she wasn't one of the ones who complained about it) to go with other outfits I had in the plans better). I don't mind gifts at all, my dolls were gifts, in fact! But there's some clear lines drawn. In giving me these dolls, my friends relinquished any say in what I did with them, even going so far as to say I could sell them if I really wanted (I don't, but that's neither here nor there).

All-in-all, defend your positions on your dolls and don't let them be character hijacked by someone else. Funny little OOC moments are fine, really, if they don't hurt the doll, but be sure of that first.

 

Your doll is yours and you should be the one controlling him, not anyone else... >.>

My friends never try to control my dolls, because I get mad quite easily and they don't want to be at the receiving end of my wrath... so to speak. XD So I never have that kind of experience. But I also never control my friends' dolls since each and every owner has his/her own storylines and characters for the dolls, and I respect that! ^^ I give advises sometimes, but never in a meany way... >.< Since there aren't many people here who own dolls, I don't want any of them to hate me. =.=

However, there were several times in DeviantArt when other people try to control my dolls by saying "you should do this..." or "that should be..." some of them are doll owners, some aren't. =.= I instantly report their messages as SPAM. I don't care. These are my dolls. >.> They can't control mine.

 

I definately think ti's annoyingwhen peoepl try to impose things on my dolls,

mine are all really cahracter driven, and it's really slly, but I get annoyed when peopel mis interpret mydolls, or do out-of-character thigns with them... for example, if they pose them in a way that isn't typical for their character...

Some of the time I keep quiet about it, or just say like "naw I think he like this" or some other gentle correctness...

I dont' want to punish other people's enthusiasm... even if it grates on my brain! LOL

 

my friends and I have had some veryintense RP and never really had a problem with this except when cannon and non cannon got confused and there was much arguing to sort out what was what. Eventually we put feet down and all stated what we wanted and things got sorted out, and all is well now. Despite this I have had one other instance, a friend got their first BJD and wrote them not only into my doll's story but into the stories of several other people I am involved with. I liked this person and tried to be accommodating, but I did have to stand my ground several times to prevent years of play being ruined because a newcomer did not understand some of our character dynamics and was simply over enthusiastic. If I had not then it would have ruined extant relationships and created a lot of drama. In the end I never had to stand up to this person on this issue at all, we had a non doll related falling out, the doll and owner disappeared from our universes and I have heard the doll has been given a whole new story and character basically, so I am happy that the owner still enjoys it, and my colls are happy continuing their existing relationships.

 

I don't ever have this problem because well, in the end the dolls are my characters and they will be themselves regardless of what anyone says. No one has control of their style or anything else. They are in MY HEAD and that makes them always entirely mine. Then again, I always have my doll's character's planned out before I buy them, so it's not like anyone else has any say about how they are as a character.

So if you're not comfortable with that kind of thing, you should just say "Hey, I'm not really comfortable with that idea. I'm just going to keep my character for myself, thanks." No one should take any offense to that because it's your doll and that's the end of it.

Of course I RP my character too, but there is never any switching of control. I am always the only one that says what my character does and I won't accept anyone else trying to take control of them. Of course I'm polite, but also very firm on this rule. The real reason it's so easy for me to do is I keep 'my version' entirely seperate from anyone else. So when I RP, I simply take my character out of his normal environment and plot line and let him play in a different scenario. It's not out of character, it's just an "Alternate Universe". Meaning none of it changes my doll's plot or personality or story. It's just that my character is now ALSO somewhere else talking to someone else's doll as well.

That being said, I love suggestions for new wigs or eyes if ones I have aren't fitting right, or even new clothes that suit my doll's style. However, I'll always say 'nah, it's not really him' or 'thanks for the suggestion but I don't really like that' if what has been offered/suggested just doesn't fit.

 

My friend and I talk about her dolls' character and my future doll's character. We mostly chose the characters ourselves but suggestions go back and forth. She's currently cursing me for suggesting additions to her storyline that included a seme for her doll and two ex-girlfriend stalker ghosts. They're on her wishlist now ^_^;;

 

This is an interesting topic, and one that I can sort of relate to. A lot of my dolls are characters of mine that I started writing about in college (though a few existed even before that time). I ended up letting my roommate who was also a close friend (we're still friends now for that matter) into the creative process too much, but didn't really realize it until it was difficult to do anything about it. It's great having someone to bounce ideas off of, but she helped pull one character in a direction that I wasn't completely happy with.

We were doing the doll hobby together when I decided to start buying bodies for these characters. I hadn't gotten back into writing yet, but did have plans to do photostories. The cast is quite big (it's the reason I have so many dolls now), and when she offered to buy bodies for two of them I agreed. Neither were central characters, and I didn't see the harm. However, when the first one got his body, it became obvious over time that her interpretation of him was a little different from my own and it made me uncomfortable. However, although he was my character he was also her doll, and it seemed too awkward to say much about it. Since I owned his brother, wife and child, and she owed me money, when she moved out of state, I kept Michael. Even though he's not a character I'm as close to as some of my others, it was a huge relief. She never had gotten around to getting a body for Riordan luckily, though he just became dollified last week by me. It's giving me the chance to reclaim his character so to speak and make him back into who he was supposed to be from the beginning (he was the one she pulled off track to begin with).

My friend was never intentionally pushy, but she has a strong personality to say the least and she was just as caught up in the story and characters as I was. However, the lack of boundaries caused the ownership of some of the characters to become rather blurred. I should have put my foot down and said, 'no, that's not really how he is" along time ago, but I was happy to have an enthusiastic supporter and someone to share my beloved characters with. However, the experience has also taught me that I need to keep control over my own characters, as I'm not comfortable with the inevitable changes that occur when another person begins to put their own stamp on them.

 

It does happen to me, but not entirely so it not a big problem here. Although I do get annoyed, I just brush the thought off cause it is not worth arguing with my friend over it. I simply just told my friend that the clothes / shoe / wig / eye which he/she choose is not my doll's style and I'm not getting it. Maybe he/she is a bit upset over it but at least he/she understand that they're my dolls and I get to make the final choice.

Another issue that happen to me is, my friend who're getting his first BJD asked me to pick the sculpt / clothes / wig etc for him. I simply told him that it is his BJD and he should get whatever he likes to suit his doll, not me. However, if he needs help on BJD sizes on clothes / wig, or websites to find a specific item, I'll be gladly to help him.

 

i have a friend just like that but instead of controling my dolls she loves to control me
anyway thank godness iam the only one intersted in dolls between my friends and ive been fighting with the company and the shiping centre to get my dolls so no i wont let them do that and if they insist then ill just control thier dolls as well (back attack??)

 

I've had something-almost- like this before. It didn't stem from excitement of a new doll coming in or anything like that though. At our local dollmeets we would all just fool around with our dolls with quick random flash pairings and etc. Sometimes the pairing only happens at dollmeets, sometimes they hang on with a little more permanency when the owners like the idea.

I'm not entirely sure how much every one of us know about everyone else's dolls (oh, we tell others casually all the time but people like me have goldfish memories), so occasionally things go OOC. Usually the owner of the OOC-ing dolls just smile and play along, cos hey, we're friends and this is kinda fun; but sometimes this response gets mistaken as 'consent' to such behaviour and gets brought up again and again. When that happens, it's annoying as hell, but for people like me, I don't like to say anything about it for fear of conflict, so I'll just nod and smile and try to detach the 'situation' from my doll as much as possible, i.e. shrugging it off.

In my case, for example, one of my dolls doesn't like girls. He's a bit of a sexist, and is gay. So for anyone saying how much he's friendly with so and so girl or is getting along well with one kind of gets on my nerves >_> Unfortunately my guy smiles flirtingly all the time, so it's not helping xD; It's not the girl's fault at all, and I don't have any grudges against her, but it does feel annoying when it's brought up.

 

My friend and I do talk about some ideas but we've never been pushy about it. O.o We often just joke around but it's not like we're being serious or make it official since we really don't know what will go on with our dolls. But we do know that her sister and her sister's friend would actually push things on to us, like they usually do with other things. It's VERY annoying and they still do it a lot but we just say no every time. I think it's starting to have SOME effect but there's nothing we can do about it except just nod our heads but turn it down.

 

I havent yet meet any other doll and owners in the flesh and resin as it were... BUT Im lookin forward to my very first meet up!
my doll Aodh has a set personality and story as he was my OC long before I got him in doll form
but I want him to interact with other's dolls... and he does too
if someone wants their doll to be Aodh's boyfriend girlfriend F*** buddy whatever... I sure Aodh will be up for it!
ofcourse they are gonna have to deal with his personality!!!

 

I'd definitely call this annoyance o.O I never had a situation like this before, but if someone told me "your doll must wear this or that" or "your doll should do this and that" i'd just feel like ordered around -_-
If it was my friend, i'd just say "yeah, right" and try to ignore any other attempts i think xD Or change subject maybe

 

She just strikes me as excited and a little carried away. Just remember that she can't literally do anything to your doll unless *you* allow her to. Talking may be annoying but it's just talk, not action, so I'd just let her run on and ignore it.

 

i am ok with that.
even my friend said the characters of my dolls should be this but not that, i just nod and said nothing.
when i am alone i will think of the words from my friends. maybe the face-up, the clothing or other details created a character that i dont want (but unaware). i will try to change thost details to makes my friends feel it match my setting.

 

Your doll's character should totally be your own creation. My husband watches with me as I trawl through various websites looking at dolls and the one I want has a beard. I want to add long hair to him and my husband thinks that's a great idea for a "Victorian" character. I have no intention of creating a Victorian theme at all! But each time I see another doll I like he keeps going on about it. Luckily for me all I have to do is squint my eyes and raise one eyebrow and he knows that's the cue to back off. lol! Sometimes certain dolls "speak" to you in ways they don't do to other people. Listen to it, go with your heart and don't worry if you're going against what everyone else wants. It's you that lives with it, not them.

 

I just had this happen this morning when my Saint arrived! When my mom first saw him she totally sees him as a potential Valentino type and thinks he should wear tight leather pants 0.o This is so odd, I don't see him that way at all and we had a good laugh over it actually.

 

The closest to this issue I've had is with my mom. I love when she gets excited about my dolls, but.... ugh. It usually takes me a long time to name my dolls, and sometimes she tries to "help". I've told her before that usually the name just eventually comes to me when I've figured the character out, but a lot of times she will just keep saying names and I'm like... -_- Then sometimes she'll say something about a doll that is totally out of character "Oh, he/she is thinking *insert thing here*" and I'm like ".... no. No they aren't." She used to come into my room and change their poses sometimes too, which would just make my heart jump into my throat. She's a collector of vintage dolls, so she knows to be gentle, I really don't worry she'd ever hurt someone... it's just... Having someone come in and manipulate my things kind of shakes me up. I struggle with mild OCD though, so I try to tell myself it's just not that big a deal.

The worst is when she flat out disagrees with me though. I have a set of twins who are currently in two Leeke Sweets, although I'm planning on re-molding them in twin LTF Pipi's :3 Anyway, one character is a boy and one is a girl (named Emiko and Nanoru). I planned them that way before I ever got the dolls, but the two dolls I got were both female. I didn't really care too much, I just dressed one boyishly and gave him a short wig. But my mom.... every time she saw them for months she would ask "why don't you just make them both girls? It's such a cute girl doll!" No matter how many times I would tell her "Because the character is a BOY D:" she didn't stop saying that for a long time -_- (and now that she stopped, I'm selling them. Go figure T_T)

Anyway, I don't mean to rant off about my mom. She's really super great and I love that she even shows an interest in my dolls and my characters. I'd rather she end up annoying me sometimes than not show any interest at all I do understand what you mean though. It can make you feel VERY uncomfortable when someone makes you feel like what you see for your dolls is wrong. Some people just don't realize how invasive it can be when they say things like that. Really I think bjd are like little blank canvases and each owner breathes a different life into them. One persons spirit for a doll may be a completely different gender/personality/story ect ect.... That's part of the fun of the hobby! I love looking at dolls I actually own and seeing what other people have done with them. Even two characters with the exact same fullset can be completely different, and then there are people who come up with completely different face-ups and styling... So really it makes sense that other people may see our dolls and see something different from what we see. I think the best way of dealing with a friend like that would be to get kind of playful with your responses. If she says "Ohh, he would make such a cute boyfriend for my doll!" maybe reply with "Yeah, too bad he's such a player. I can't imagine him having just one girlfriend!" or something like that. I kind of learned that if it's me telling them they're wrong there may be hurt feelings, but if it's the doll telling them it usually just gets a laugh

 

Never had this with a BJD but did with a childhood doll.
Now i am 100% a doll person, my dolls have always been very important to me. All my dolls have had OC's since early childhood. I have this doll since i was 4-5 years old. Her persona has been completely formed over 25 years ago. The mold, face-up and bodysculpt of this doll fit a woman in her late 20's-early thirties.

A friend of mine came over, commented on the dolls pretty physique and started playing with her, by using a voice and speech pattern appropriate to a child just starting to talk. Subject was she wanted to buy more "toysies". And she would not stop.

I was really, really surprised at how angry this made me.

 

I've had something similar happen between a friend and I. She owns a Souldoll Lidell and I own a Leekeworld Mabel. When I went to her house she kept complaining about the way my doll looked. Her Lidell is a part of the kid line and had HUGE boobs and is also slim. Mabel is very flat chested and has a pear shape, because as well, she is a kid line of leekeworld. My friend kept saying "I don't like her because blahblahblah". It's not like she's the one with my doll, but she found the need to complain about it regardless.

I think the nicest thing to do (and what I did) is just to tell your friend you appreciate her enthusiasm towards your doll, but remind her that it is YOUR DOLL, and that you're going to do what you want to do with it