When one doll overshadows all the others...

I only have two dolls at home right now, but Ethan definitely overshadows Alex. A lot. Even though Alex is the 'old boy'.

Alex came to me in 2012, as the most expensive impulse buy I've ever made! I wanted a distraction from my mum's illness at that time, and I'd been looking into BJDs for a while. So, I bought a Ringdoll Sol in normal with the default face-up. For a couple of years, it was good and then my interest waned. Alex got shoved up on a shelf, just collecting dust and the odd glance his way.

This year, I came back to the hobby and brought home Ethan. A Dollshe Saint head bought secondhand, on a brand new Resinsoul bigger boy body. Ethan was not purchased at a difficult time, as such, but the character was created during a difficult year. 2016, like for most, was a hard one. I lost my pet rats, Munchkin and Pipsqueak (the latter after a few rough days), and a few famous icons (Prince, Anton Yelchin, and Chris Cornell - actually this year, but before the doll came home). To help me cope with Yelchin's untimely passing, I created Ethan's story. And, obviously, Ethan himself.

So, naturally, I cling more to Ethan than I do Alex. Although Alex and I have the deep connection of him aiding me through my mum's illness and subsequent recovery (she's in the clear now, has been for 5 years), I feel strongly bonded to Ethan. He was never meant for doll form, but I saw the potential in the Saint sculpt and knew I had to do it. His girlfriend, Sam, is due home next year, and she will likely push Alex even further down the pecking order. But, he's hanging around still. Not sure for how much longer, but he's still here at the time of posting this (and looks to be staying for a while yet).

 

I definitely play favorites too. Sometimes I get out someone I haven't spent time with lately and just change their clothes or something to see if that rekindles my interest (it usually works for at least that moment), but I try not to feel too bad about enjoying one doll over the others. For me the "guilt" comes from having spent money on them and then not doing anything with them, and the projects I'm putting off with other dolls, but... in time I'll probably get back around to everyone. What I know about myself is that I change without reason or warning, so I don't think I'll always be fixated on the same doll even if it feels like it right now.

 

I own 13 dolls and I love all of them except 2 (trying to sell 2 of them), and I definitely have favorites. My first doll, named Genesis, who is a 5 Star Doll Tumnus, is my favorite. I've had him since 2011. I could live without any of my dolls except him. He is my sweetie. I absolutely adore him. He has the most developed personality and back story of any of my dolls, and I feel very close to him. It's weird to feel that way about a doll.


Actually I feel the same about another doll, which is not a BJD. I have a baby doll that was a gift from my grandma, and she bought it when I was born. It was put in the crib with me when I came home from the hospital, and the doll has been with me ever since. I would be devastated if anything happened to her. She's been with me through many moves, flying across the US several times, a house fire, flooding, having cancer etc. She's a survivor just like me.

 

All of my dolls go through phases of being my new favorite when they first come home. Some get more attention then others. Lately the three I've been giving more attention to, have been Avalon, Avery and Vala. Just how it goes.

 

My favourite non original character Loki has a lot more clothes and props than most of my others put together. I have gone through times when I want to cut down and have sold dolls only to find others and end up with more. I know the feeling of being overwhelmed by them at times to. I now have around 30 and can not fit more in my cabinet. Sometimes I feel a bit bad about neglecting some of them but then I think they are dolls and works of art so they do not need constant attention. Knowing they are there waiting for me to enjoy makes me happy.

 

I have one group that consistently overshadows the others, and its the 11 cm tinies. I have DZ Momo and Nono, a PukiPuki Cochon and a DD-Anne Tiny Near who have a box full of small outfits and wigs, while some of my larger dolls are half naked and shoeless...

 

This happened to me back in 2011...in a very drastic and dramatic way. A company came out with a doll that...the moment I first saw her...I literally had to have her. Yes, she became an instant Grail for me! So I ordered her, and once she arrived and I'd finished her face-up and artwork, I suddenly realized that all my other dolls paled by comparison. I kept hoping that the feeling would soon pass but it never did. What it turned out to be, in my case, was a character issue. The new doll literally encompassed the characters of my entire collection...all into that one single doll! It was like she absorbed the unique qualities of every other doll I owned into herself, rendering the rest absolutely redundant! I was shocked, and while I resisted it for as long as I could, I eventually purged everyone but her. And then I used the money to start anew, building my collection around her this time. Amazingly it worked and I've been happy and content with my collection ever since.

 

First it was Mk lillian and she's still my favorite but now it's Lucywen omg Lucywen i Love her so much. which is kinda sad considering i have 16 other dolls that need attention . i feel as though my gem of doll rae doesn't get the attention she deserves despite being the only doll whom i loved so much i felt the need to get her full set . on top of that there are already so many pictures of Lucywen like everywhere and not too many of Rae.

 

Recently I got my first MSD and to be honest I've been totally prioritizing him over my smaller dolls... Though for me this might just be because of the novelty of having such a big doll that I actually like. X'D For a while the idea of larger dolls reminded me way too much of the American Girl doll my mother got me as a kid... it absolutely terrified me, I wouldn't touch it.

But now... woah! He's big and heavy and substantial-feeling and I actually like having him around???

When I take out my smaller dolls I still feel very strongly about them, but in a way they feel more delicate and I feel like I can't enjoy them quite as much, you know?

 

I'm not sure what I can say to that as I don't even own one doll yet but I do have that worry that once I buy that first doll and slowly acquire more, I will favor one doll over another. I tend to do that now with my dolls and stuffed animals, I tend to prefer one over the others and I feel bad that the others are sitting around gathering dust and not played with enough. But I think it's okay if you prefer one over others. You still care about the others since you worry about them but sometimes, attention spans come and go. I know I tend to play with one for a while then set it aside and pick up a new thing that holds my attention and then when I go back to the old one, it's like a brand new toy all over again with a sense of nostalgia.

Not sure if what I'm making makes any sense but I think it's okay. Sometimes, you just prefer one thing over the others but doesn't mean you love the others any less. There just seems to be more you can do with that one at the time or so.

Sorry if this is all confusing. I feel a bit confused myself even though I do understand your worry.

 

You will always have a favorite, no matter what or who: pet, sibling, child, doll, clothes... everything. This is human. This is a gut feeling. You can fight it if you want, or if fighting it makes you feel better about it, but it won't change how you feel inside. I don't think there is anything wrong with this. As long as you treat them 'fair' - take equal attention to the doll's safety and good condition - there is nothing wrong if you 'play' more with one or the other for a certain period of time.

Maybe some of them don't want your intense attention. :-) Yes, I mean it, one of my dolls always give me the cold shoulder (and a lot of trouble) if I 'nag' him too much about dressing, or taking photos.

 

This is a big problem for me as I have so many dolls. I'm in love with my 4.3 Imda doll and everything I buy goes to her first before the other girls can get any love. Its really frustrating because I go into the hobby thinking I'm going to do this and that for a specific girl and then jump and work a little on the next but that doesn't end up happening. It all goes to the one and then the other 18 have to wait for me to save more money to shop for them. Lol I'm really trying though. XD

 

I'm well aware that I can be biased when it comes to my dolls. I only have two, a DD Mirai and a DDH-09, and the one I customized myself to look like a character of mine is just a bit closer to my heart. It does change, though, for a little while depending on who has/is the new shinies. Still, when I look for clothes or other stuff, I always have my Aly in mind first.

 

I play favorites, all the time, but it also revolves LOL.
I have 12 Bjds, but I know that only a few of them stand out. Some rarely made it for a photoshoot. But I am trying my best.
I love fairyland bjds. so most of the time, my minifees and littlefee is the one who often get to go out with me or i take pictures of them. Feeple is a bit too big, so harder for them to bring out, but they are my favorite, but they just don't really get their clothes changed XD.
I think it also depends on my mood, who i think will make me feel more positive, then i will tend to play with that one. But again, it revolves. and what makes it harder is that I also have to share my attention with other types of dolls that I have.
But these few weeks (or maybe month), my fairyland bjd is getting all my attention.

 

I've noticed that I tend to have phases where I'll work more on one of my dolls. The three I have all need or are good for such different things -- Hyacinth is easy to sew for but doesn't get the fun reactions in public as much, Saskia is a challenge no matter what I do with her but gets great reactions because she's quite unusual, and Essie is easy to photograph and sew for but doesn't get any reactions because she's SO tiny. Currently, I'm in a Saskia phase, but eventually I'll exhaust my current project and/or motivation to continue wrestling with her.