When was the first time you could not bond with a doll?

Interesting question about bonding.
My first reaction was to think, well that's not me, I only have 2 BJD's, Sooah and DIM Marianne, and couldn't wait for them to get here!
But to be perfectly honest, I've bonded way more with Marianne in the month she's been here than in the 4 months that I've had with Sooah. I'm hoping that will change after I find some time to redo her face-up and make her some clothes, etc.......... we'll see

 

the first time i got a doll... I was expecting too much. I was expecting the greatest articulated high quality resin doll... but turn out to be fairly ordinary.. it is beautiful but I guess i was over-expecting. Maybe i was expecting him to be able to talk and dance for me for all the money I've spent on him. So back then I didnt really get the term 'bonding' with a resin doll before. I think Ive only bonded with him after he has been left standing next to my bed for a few months.

 

e-e; I haven't bonded at all with any of my 4 girls. Maybe if I took them places or got them more clothing..? D: Sigh. I'm not sure. I'm hoping a big girl will be easier to bond with.

 

I've had 2 dolls that I've never truly bonded with.

One was a DoD Yen, who wanted to kill me (evil vibes from that doll... evil...)

The other was an Unoa Azurite... it was just too small and delicate, I always thought he was going to break apart.

 

My first doll Megi and i didn't bond ^^; i fell in love with him after seeing pics but after a month or so it just didn't work out ^^; so i sold him and bought Takumi my MNF Shiwoo and it's working out nicely ^^

 

I've never had a problem with not bonding with a doll... I even got attached to the modded Vampire Breakaway that was meant to be Lugosi but never felt like... Lugosi. Now that Lugosi is in his correct form, that Breakaway lives with my friend, Luxury. I still feel a certain sort of attachment to him even though I knew he wasn't right for any of my characters.

 

I have bonded less with one of my dolls. I think it's because
1. He's my only large doll, and I'm still at a loss of how to deal with his size
2. I didn't do his faceup myself (This was a real bonding experience with the others)
3. I don't spend enough time with him (If I'm going somewhere, I take one of my smaller dolls instead, when I'm doing something around the house, my tiny or mini can usually perch somewhere nearby, whereas he's too big)
4. He's a difficult size to find clothing/shoes for, so he hardly has anything to wear, and then I'm less likely to photograph him than the others

Intellectually, I like him, but there's just not the same emotional connection. I'm trying to make myself bond more by making and commissioning some more outfits for him.

 

I didn't bond with my first BJD. I wanted instant gratification, and couldn't wait for a doll to be ordered, so I bought one that was instantly available. Although she was cute, she wasn't what I would have chosen if I had been willing to wait. As a result, when I later saw a doll that made me catch my breath because she was so adorable, I regretted spending the money on the first doll. I ended up selling her at a loss to get money quickly for my dream girl. I'm insanely happy with my new doll. I've learned my lesson.... I'll never buy another doll simply because she's available. It's better to wait and get what you really want. Especially when you're going to be paying so much money for her!

Karen

 

I'm not bonding well with my first doll. (Juri 2006 Head) I won her here on DoA, and I had never really thought about a Juri '06 before. She's my first and I was excited. But since I got her, she's fighting me. She just ISN'T my sweet, forest fay, Maylinn. She seems to be a sassy girl who aside from that, I know nothing about. I tried doing a face up on her as Maylinn, but it's just not working. So I'm buying a new wig and giving in to Kumi Elizabeth. Maybe it's because she doesn't have a body yet. I don't know... I'm really upset and sad about it... A little scared even. I wouldn't feel right selling or trading her, because I WON her. I'd feel so guilty. It's all very sad for me right now. Makes me a little afraid to get any other dollies.

 

I've only really failed to bond with one doll, and that was Amethyst, my Serendipity Shall. Not for lack of trying, mind you. She was an impulse buy off eBay, right back when I first started getting into BJDs; I had an Obitsu 60 on order, but I was impatient to get a "real" (i.e. resin) BJD, and I spotted her on eBay and on impulse bought her. (I spotted Neph, my DoC Hoo, on eBay a day or two later and bought him on impulse too, but never had a problem bonding with him.)

When her box arrived, I was excited and opened - only to feel instant disappointment when I lifted her out; my reaction was "Oh." I named her Talula, made her outfits, did a few photoshoots with her and Neph, changed her face-up, and eventually went so far as to mod her eyes extensively and completely redo her face-up again - even gave her a new name, Amethyst. I had a little Omukae ceremony to give her her new name in the hopes it might help me bond with her as a "new" doll.

But nothing worked. Finally, after two years, I conceded defeat and sold her on eBay; and with the money I was able to buy my MNF Shiwoo, Xavier - and had no problems bonding with him right out of the box, even without a face-up! It was like he bounded out of the box saying "Hi, I'm here - love me??"

I did wonder for a long time if my issues with Amethyst were because she was a little girl rather than a taller boy doll. I'd noticed that I interacted with my SD-sied dolls more than my minis (in addition to Neph and Amethyst, I'd picked up an elf Ttori boy, Alaric), and of my SD-sized dolls it was the boys I was involved with more than the girls. I did start to wonder if perhaps I'm just happier with large boys. But I'd had Amalthea's RML K-02 head for a year and decided she really ought to have a body and bought her a DZ 1/4 body; she went through a name change and a face-up - but though I had trepidations after my experience with Amethyst, there was no problem at all with Miyobi. I picked her up after I'd finished and realised she definitely had a place with my others - which Amethyst never had. And I noticed that suddenly I was playing more with my other minis too; so I had no doubts as to whether getting another mini (Xavier) was a good idea or not. And Miyobi seems to have solved my issue with girl dolls, too; in fact I'm now seriously considering getting another mini girl so Miyobi won't be left out amongst the mini boys!

Amethyst is my only bonding "failure"; I still feel bad about her sometimes, but I gave her two years and did everything possible - wig changes, eye changes, clothes, face-ups, modding, a name change - nothing worked. I'm confident that she is far better off with her new owner where she will be much-loved - and selling her enabled me to get Xavier! So I put it down to a learning experience.

 

I totally agree with this sentence.
I failed to bond with one of my doll.
I really hoped her before I get her. But when I received her, I can't explain but I just can't love her. I changed her make up some times but she's still not that kind of little lady I'm hoping for.
It's not her problem, she's still a beautiful little lady. She deserves to go to a better home. So I sold it.

 

I can't get one of my girls as I want her... and it makes me kinda sad. so I'm trying to find a new head for her....

 

Quite a number of people have stated problems bonding with their first dolls. I'm waiting for my first and to be honest, I'm very much anxious as to how it will all turn out in the end. Will I be happy with him? Will he be happy with me? It almost feels like adopting a child... you just don't know what to expect sometimes.

*crosses fingers and hopes all goes well*

 

I'm having that problem right now with my Unoa Sist, she's beautiful but our bond is very weak. She just sleeps all day because I never want to pick her up and pose her or anything. I know it's not fair to her, but I don't want to sell her either.
I don't know what to do I'm scared to stand her up because she might fall, scared to pose her because her back made a scary popping noise, she's turning(or already is) yellow, and her face up isn't what I want at all.

My friend says we'll fix her up somehow and make her look like how I wanted her to, and maybe things will improve. I can only hope...I'm not happy with her at all right now. The seller never mentioned she was missing her special eye pole so her eyes are stuck with puddy, and never mentioned that she was already yellow. It's not like it's just a yellow tint, it's like...light golden yellow. it distracts me.

 

Then when she finally came, I wasn't in love. She is gorgeous, but I just don't have the same feeling for her that I have for my others.

I offered her for sale, and then the sale fell through. So, Lydia is still here. I think it's crazy that I don't sell her, but she is such a beautiful doll, I don't understand why I don't bond with her. Sheesh.


Jennifer in Massachusetts
http://www.dollhabits.com

 

It was the same situation with me and not bonding with my first doll. I would always do stuff with her, but I really felt that my feelings for her probably weren't this crazy "bonding" I heard people talk about. But I just kind of said to myself, other people can like their dolls in their way, I'll like mine in my own way.

But then about about a year later I got my second doll and I knew that I hadn't bonded with my first, because when Rhode got here it was instant love. And even though I finally came to terms with the fact that I hadn't bonded with Yumiko, it was still difficult to bring myself to put her up for sale. I really tried to love her, but it just wasn't happening.

 

Well I made some sort of light bond with True today. Finally one of her new outfits came and she tried it on. It made me smile because I think she finally likes something I got for her. It also covers up her icky yellowness until I can take her in for a makeover. Right now she seems happy with the little things she has, and every day I get a new package so eventually she'll be able to dress up.
She looked so cute in her fluffy sweater that I posed her a little before letting her go back to sleep ^^...it's a start.

 

I absolutely couldn't bond to my second doll, which was a BW El. He ended up going to one of my friends because I couldn't stand to have him if I wasn't bonded to him.

 

Unfortunatly for me, it was with my very first doll
I had been saving and saving like mad, staring at photos and reading loads and loads of information. I did loads of concept art and wrote small stories about her. In the end I lost my patience and bought a cheaper doll despite all the warnings I got from members here. I was impatient and foolish and I ended up having to sell my Soulkid Tiffee after a year of trying to bond with her.
My real dream was a CP Soony wich I got in the end and I love her to bits..

 

It is really hard when you cannot bond with a doll. So much money and planning goes into any doll that it is always disappointing.
I usually know right away and will sell the doll with a couple weeks. Sometimes it takes longer. I may think the doll is beautiful so I will hold on to it for awhile, but a bond never really forms.
It is also really hard when you have a super strong bond with one of your dolls. It always makes me compare how much I like a doll and how attached I am to it by comparing it to my favorite girl. This has caused me to get rid of a lot of my dolls because they just couldn't measure up.