When your SO makes you feel weird about your hobby?

When I first started getting interested in BJD's, I told my boyfriend about it and he seemed confused. It took a lot of explaining, but once he understood what the appeal was to me, he was completely on board with the idea. He still does not quite understand why I would want to give my doll a backstory. He thinks it is odd to want to treat her like a person (give her a personality, likes, dislikes, etc.), but he has told me that he wants me to enjoy my doll no matter what he thinks about it. I think at the end of the day, not everyone will share your love, but someone who really cares about you will support you doing something that you really enjoy.

 

I'm pretty happy that my fiancé is supportive of my hobby for the most part. He's bought me shelves, built me shelves, and doesn't even complain when I take up half the bed and half the day re-dressing them. That said, he really, really doesn't like my big Lusion Dahlia, so even if I didn't keep her covered to protect her from dust and light, she'd be covered so he didn't have to see her. I guess I can deal with it.

 

For me, i actually don't let it get to me. He didn't quite like them at first, but the more I started picking at him with them and also letting him join me with doing stuff with them he became a bit more open to them. He didn't come from a well off background (nor did I ) but spending so much on a doll was a big culture shock for him.

Gradually and through much of my being annoying he did start to participate a little bit with me, liking how I dress them and make them look like action figures and such. When I take pictures of them he'll occasionally steal my camera and snap shots of them or pose them to take shots he's got ideas for.

He won't ever get one himself, but he sees that I do just have a hobby and it's fun to me, and that's all I ask for.

ETA: It did help that he is into anime and figures a bit, so i wouldn't necessarily be annoying like I was with him if I was with someone that didn't actually like their aesthetic. Someone that didn't like them like that I'd be a lot more considerate around, but overall I don't think I could happily be in a relationship where the person is actually creeped out all the time by something I'm passionate about.

 

My experiences with significant others and dolls have varied.

It's actually to no surprise that my worst ex (by far) happened to be really creeped out by dolls and absolutely could not stand them. Even when they were anime-styled dolls modeled after his favorite characters, he just wouldn't look at them, even though he also had anime figurines. Eventually, he told me that while it was nice that I was so passionate about something, that I should refrain from talking about it because he just didn't like them. I felt horrible but decided to stop talking about dolls because I thought it would make him happy. However, it wasn't just dolls- anything he didn't like, he had an utter repulsion and aversion to. (From family matters to snails.) Eventually, it got to the point where I was only allowed to talk about what he liked and what he wanted to talk about. It became clear that he didn't actually respect my preferences and opinions, so eventually he got the boot

My current boyfriend has passingly called them creepy, but for the most part doesn't really mind my dolls at all. He knows that it's my hobby, and as long as it makes me happy without any consequences, then he's fine with it. He's also grown to accept it as long as it means that he can have all the action figures he wants We have a lot of contrasting views and opinions, but as long as we're respectful to each other about it, that's all that matters.

 

My fianceé has a doll phobia and can't stand even having them near, I don't really mind it, I try not to bring the subject as much as I can and we are ok like that. She even wants to overcome her phobia slowly and try and paint my boys, but even if she can't, she's been respectful and hasn't done any rude comments on them. I'm pretty happy about that because I honestly don't expect my partner to share all my hobbies, we play video games, we like comics and series, she loves football and eh, well I don't but I enjoy hearing her excited and while she's afraid of my dolls, she never dismisses the topic when I talk about it. Guess not everyone is willing to accept this hobby of ours but as long as you state they are important to you and don't let that fact change just to accommodate to your SO, it's ok not to share it

 

Luckily for me, my SO is just as nerdy as I am about certain things. Sure, he doesn't collect dolls. But I've shown him several sculpts and he honestly finds them really cool. He said if money wasn't an issue, that he'd probably want a doll of his own. Of course, he's not willing to pay for one. But, like me, he considers them art. And we're both really into art. Plus, he also doesn't find the fact that I collect stuffed animals weird either...

 

My bf cares enough about me that even though he HATES dolls and is really creeped out by them, he will still buy me MH dolls and accept that I enjoy BJDs as well and tries to humor me when I ask him for outfit or wig advice even though what he wants to do is tell me to put it away and stop asking him.

 

When I talked to my boyfriend about it and asked him if he'd ever want one/what he thought about them, he said that they kinda creeped him out. Thankfully he's gotten used to my hobby and will listen when I blabber on about what doll I want THIS time.

 

My boyfriend is pretty mellow about all of my hobbies and tries to get involved with them within reason, even if he's not really that interested. For example, he always comments on my MH dolls and will ask me; "Where's ___ doll?" or "Are you planning on getting another BJD?" We don't share all of our hobbies, but we share most of them! It would be hard for me if he wouldn't talk to me about the things I was interested in/passionate about, though. Usually he patiently listens (as long as I don't try to strike up a conversation about it while he's gaming! )

 

I consider myself EXTREMELY lucky. After several years on a hiatus from the hobby, I finally took the plunge a few months ago & brought my Holy Grail doll home. My husband was interested in her because she was something I cared about. For a while, I would catch him looking over my shoulder while I browsed DoA & he would casually ask about the dolls I was looking at... until last week he stopped me & was in awe of a Feeple65 Chloe. He first asked what she was, then asked the price... then said it didn't matter, that we needed her home.

I'm currently working on bringing her home for Valentine's Day as my gift to him.

However, I have had close friends who find them creepy or unnerving, but at the end of the day, you just have to tell them that you'd appreciate if they didn't speak ill of something that makes you happy. That includes the boyfriend.

 

My S/O can be kinda strange in regards to my dolls sometimes in a way that makes me a little uncomfortable but generally they seem to understand that I care a lot about my dolls and they are overall very supportive of me and my passions which I am very glad about..

 

My SO doesn't like them, but I don't care! He has his hobbies, I am really thrifty and feel being thrifty in all other aspects of my life I should be able to have these dolls. I don't drink or smoke, get my hair done, buy new clothes or shoes, purses I buy everything I need used if I can... Even dolls! I hang my clothes on the line and in winter I have a pole and rack to dry them from the heat of the coal stove! Lol

 

My husband is very interested in my dolls and wants one of his own. I think he may actually look at dolls for sale more than I do. He is always tagging me and send me pics of dolls he finds. He is very supportive. I do tend to talk his ear off when I get excited about a doll and he has the spaced out look but he always does that lol. But my husband is a collector as well. We just love to collect things especially toys. Otherwise the rest of our lives we are thrifty. We don't go out to eat, I don't get my hair or nails done.

 

Since my husband is into model kits (Gundams and the like) he's always been supportive. Passive-supportive, to be exact as he can only let me talk about whatever new doll discoveries I have for a few minutes before he loses interest. Then I feel really weird. I know when he's just pretending to listen and stares off into space, lol. I suppose it's the same with me with his hobbies at first but when he got me one as a present and I tried building it with him, I became genuinely interested to the point of buying a couple of my own and building them myself without his help.

Anyway he changed in a similar way during our recent visit to Japan. I wasn't intending to purchase a doll, let alone within the first hour of the trip but when we went inside the store and saw all these dolls on display, we were both drawn to the same girl (she's the one in my avatar).

I tried to resist the urge to buy as I put in an order for one before our vacation but it was hubby who helped me make up my mind to finally buy her. I was so surprised! He said "well, it's because until now, I've never seen one that caught my attention". He went as far as to lend me yen then and there so I don't need to rush to the money exchange. He also helped me to take picture of her unboxing, says hi, etc. What I mean is, he's changed since finding one he actually appreciates. The last time we talked, he's been thinking of ways to craft things for my dolls...like horns or shoes, so we're going to be saving for proper materials we can both use.

I guess it helps that he was part of the process in choosing one. Now, he sees how similar our hobbies are in terms of being a creative outlet.