Why do some collectors choose to not go to meetups?

Do you feel you're too old or too young?
Haha as if! I got into BJD's when I was 15 [i'm 18 now], and while I was oh so enthusiastic to go to my first doll meet, a lot of the ones [that i found anyway] were being host at someone's house where the age limit was 16, and if you were under 18, you had to have a parent with you. Yeah, not interested in bringing my mom/dad with me >>; so that kept me out of meet ups for the past two years. But I did bring my first doll to a convention meet during my doll's first year.
Do you think you or your doll won't be liked?
8/ I don't see why my doll wouldn't be liked >>; as for me, well, I guess I am a little obnoxious [can't help it, i'm young]
Do you think your outfits aren't worthy of showing off?
Tcchhh. The outfit Luel wore to the convention meet was sooo not cute [he wore a sleeveless turtleneck made from a sock] and he didn't have shoes. Although, these days whenever I bring my dolls out with me, I always try to dress them in their best ^^;
Do you think you're not worthy of showing off, or afraid of what others will think of you personally?
Me? Not worthy of showing off? I'm all about dressing to impress or looking spiffy cool 8D *brick'd*
Are you afraid to bring your doll out, for fear of damage or theft?
If I can brave taking my doll to school with me [highschool at that], I'm definitely not afraid of taking my doll to a meet.
Did you or someone else have a bad experience?
Nope.
Are you afraid it will be silly because you have no doll?
8/ I had a doll at my first meet, but even if I didn't I like looking at other people's doll.
Are you nervous it would make you want to purchase new dolls?
Hahah...yeah, okay, I do get kinda nervous about that...but I wouldn't let it keep me away.
Are you expecting, with all the youth on DoA, a group of immature, loud, sex-crazed teenagers who'll grab your doll without asking and strip it naked? (Heh.)
... *is part of that youth* no comment.
Really though, I'd be bothered a lot if someone did that >>;

I've been to only 2 meets, including the convention one 8/ I missed one last month only because I didn't have a ride there...Transportation is my main problem that keeps me from going to meets.

 

I'm a fairly introverted person to begin with, but I also have an erratic work schedule and I'm involved with a few group activities with my friends (I tabletop game and a few friends and I jog together to keep from turning into flub beasts). So usually my empty calendar days are few and far between and I tend to want to spend them at home just taking things easy.

 

I missed several meets in my city because of exams and deadlines.
The only one i attended was in NYC and i have to say it was a pretty good experience. I didn't have my doll with me that time but i still manage to have a great time. People were very friendly there and when i'm not into conversations i would just take photos of each and every doll to keep myself busy.

 

I've had several extremely rude things said to me at doll meets, all directed towards the fact that the majority of my dolls are from Volks, but in the end, I'm very thick skinned and it's hard to really offend me. It's more I hate that feeling of awkwardness I experience sometimes at meets where I find myself going "Ummmm what now?" once the initial set up and excitement has died down. It's hard to talk about just dolls when you find yourself with completely different tastes and ideas about the hobby, and there's no guarantee other doll owners share the same non-doll interests as you.

Of course, I've met some really cool people at doll meets too. Usually I just take along a friend, as that way I have someone to talk to.

 

I don't really refuse to go to them, but I'm not always "in the loop" with them either. My schedule is always kind of crazy because I'm a grad student, so the last time I went to a meet was a year ago. I've never had any problems with the people I've met though--they were all really casual and nice.

 

The times I don't go to meets are either distance, schedualing, or being uncomfortable. If all of my dolls are stripped down to bare resin, have no faces and I've sold their clothes for some reason (I've done that to my poor Michelle... She needs new shirts now >.>), then I likely won't go. Also, I work two jobs, so depending on the financial position I'm in, I can't afford to take off work for a meet (Which I ALWAYS have to do.)

I find in General that I don't have a problem talking to people. I will end up talking to someone about random dollie stuff. I find I have no problem talking dolls.

Edit to add: AS to the stripping naked, I don't mind it, as long as one asks XD. I actually like seeing other sculpts and encourage others to look at mine if they're interested. After all, the doll is not only the face but the body as well .

 

Haha, frankly, I'm one person who isn't interested in meetups anymore because of all the shy people!
What are you all so scared of? We're a bunch of doll nerds! Why go to a meet and then sit in the corner silently and look at me like I'm insane if I try to converse with you about your doll?

Thankfully I have met many awesome, socially-adept people at meetups. I'm glad I know them. Now I don't feel the need to sit through any more awkward meets.

 

I'm actually on medication for social anxiety, so it's not just a matter of being shy. It's a chemical thing that makes me panic. It's not a normal "scared" thing.

Also, some people are naturally quiet- that doesn't mean they aren't socially capable. If you're a natural talker, just try to imagine going somewhere where you're in a crowd and expected not to talk. It's hard!

 

Well...I love going to doll meets...In fact...my first one was at Animazement in downtown Raleigh. But the second one I was supposed to go to; the meeting today; I couldn't go because my dad had to stay at his job really late and by the time I got there...I would have to turn around and go back. But I think the only reason I'd be scared to go is theft or damage, especially to my little Puki. I've had some collector's tell me that their Puki was stolen at a doll meet. O_O I don't want to lose my little girl...she keeps me company during those long hospital stays. I would die without her! X_X

 

Do you feel you're too old or too young?
I think I'm about the average age for these sorts of things, so no...
Do you think you or your doll won't be liked?
In comparison, I think that my dolls are a little plain...and I'm pretty shy in big groups so more than being disliked, I'm afraid we'd be a little invisible. It's hard enough posting on a message board, imagine being face to face.
Do you think your outfits aren't worthy of showing off?
Definitely. I don't have a lot of fancy clothes for my dolls to dress up in. I don't have access to sewing materials where I'm living now, nor the talent to make something drool worthy.
Do you think you're not worthy of showing off, or afraid of what others will think of you personally? Yes and no. Kinda depends on what kind of mood I'm in.
Are you afraid to bring your doll out, for fear of damage or theft? Nah. I got over that. My dolls are little pilgrims, we've traveled the world together. And we're still intact!
Are you nervous it would make you want to purchase new dolls?
Hahaha, yes, but I have more than enough dolls. It would be a lot of fun to see the otherwise unavailable dolls in person, though!
Are you expecting, with all the youth on DoA, a group of immature, loud, sex-crazed teenagers who'll grab your doll without asking and strip it naked? This doesn't REALLY happen does it...?

I think it would be really fun to meet some people who are interested in dolls, but not knowing anyone there would feel a little awkward. Maybe the next time you Oregon people get together in Portland, I'll gather my balls and my dolls and go.

 

I don't go to meetups mostly 'cause they're a pain to get to, even if they aren't relatively that far. They always seem to be in one of the nearby cities, such as San Francisco, and someplace that is intimidatingly far from BART. Call me wimpy, but I don't relish figuring out the mysterious thing called the "muni" and trying to find things on foot all by my lonesome little self in a big city I'm not very familiar with!

Another reason I guess I lack motivation to go to meets is 'cause I happen to live with my sister, who is also a "doll person". So that's twice the dolls to play with and plenty of doll chatter/squee'ing I already have at home! You can imagine the noise here when our favorite companies unveil their new releases.

But if they were easier to get to I'd probably go to meets now and then. I'm probably smack in the middle of the age range, have decent self-confidence, and love my dolls. Granted, I would not take my most expensive dolls unless it was to an organized, sit-down type event (I took one to a Volks party), though I'd be more than happy to tote around my mini boy and Pukifee and let other polite doll owners handle them. Maybe someday . . .

 

Exactly. It goes beyond ordinary shyness for some of us, we have a legitimate problem, and for me it transcends doll stuff and applies to every aspect of my life. Personally I don't give a flying rat's behind what people think of my dolls or anything like that, I just do not feel comfortable in groups of people I don't know.

Quiet people don't think people who try and talk to them are insane, we're just genuinely nervous and it's hard for us to talk back to you. It may sound odd or stupid to others who are not shy, but you've got to understand that for us it's debilitating and difficult.

 

Most of the time, I skip a meetup because it's on a day I have to work. I also tend to skip meets that don't have amenities like coffee and photogenic scenery. After this many years I just sort of chuck a doll in a bag and go. I'm more interested in chatting with friends or seeing people I only see a few times a year than I am in displaying my dolls. Sometimes I forget I brought them and never take a single picture because I'm too busy catching up with everyone and looking at their dolls!

Do you feel you're too old or too young?
I'm older than some, younger than others. I definitely feel less energetic than some, but some of those people are older than me!

Do you think you or your doll won't be liked?
My dolls are usually greeted with enthusiasm. If their owner is less popular than they are I wouldn't know.

Do you think your outfits aren't worthy of showing off?
My outfits are usually hand-crafted stupidity and are only for a laugh, or I've bought something spectacular and want to show it off. Rarely is there middle ground.

Do you think you're not worthy of showing off, or afraid of what others will think of you personally?
I cannot control what other people think, therefore I simply do what I feel I am capable of doing that day. Dress up or not. Chat with new people or not. I try to curtail the depressing tirades about the state of our environment and call that good enough.

Are you afraid to bring your doll out, for fear of damage or theft?
I select the dolls I'm taking to a meetup based on the situation. No whiteys in direct sun, no bad posers on rough ground, and never ever my Choa with the unique faceup. I don't worry about theft, but accidents are by their very nature beyond one's control. Although an earthquake could trash them all tomorrow, so I don't know why I bother.

Did you or someone else have a bad experience?
Gauche people are always a bad experience. They aren't really limited to doll owners though. The doll crowd is pretty large here, so one can pick and choose what style of meet one would feel most comfortable at. I've hosted several behemoth public meets of 40+ people and it's just not easy to coordinate, especially when the weather is so erratic here. I feel responsible for the safety of all of the dolls, so it can be rather stressful when random strangers arrive with no one to introduce them. Usually they end up being the sweetest people though. I have a soft spot for the shy noobs.

Are you afraid it will be silly because you have no doll?
I had a Shiwoo dressed up like an idiot sheep in hot pants at my first meet, so perhaps I looked more silly than if I'd had no doll.

Are you nervous it would make you want to purchase new dolls?
This is always a danger. But no more dangerous than a few hours on DoA.

Are you expecting, with all the youth on DoA, a group of immature, loud, sex-crazed teenagers who'll grab your doll without asking and strip it naked?
In my experience, it's usually cackling middle-aged women that do this, but I've never given them the opportunity.

 

A lot of people i have seen with dolls have been rather snobby, till this last con I went to no one would evan answer my questions let alone let me hold the doll evan when I asked. Im more afriad of going t a large meet up and having that happen.

 

Do you feel you're too old or too young? If I don't go it's likely because the meetup is composed of people who I am much older than. That does make me feel uncomfortable, I admit.

Do you think you or your doll won't be liked? I know my dolls are pretty different from most peoples'. I don't worry too much about it though. All other things being equal/favorable this alone would not stop me from going to a meet.

Do you think your outfits aren't worthy of showing off? Maybe, but I don't worry about it too much. I don't buy expensive designer stuff, I tend to make my dolls' clothing. If other people don't like it... >shrug< ^^:;

Do you think you're not worthy of showing off, or afraid of what others will think of you personally? I look good for a woman my age, which is all one can hope for after a certain point. I don't worry about it, but if I find I'm with a bunch of pop-culture or high-fashion afficionados, I'm aware my of my comparatively drab unpainted un-label-able appearance and lack of designer duds. I don't really care, though. I'm focused on worthier things in life. ^_~

Are you afraid to bring your doll out, for fear of damage or theft? I wouldn't attend an outdoor meet, I don't take my dolls outside except for a quick photoshoot. Otherwise common sense goes a long way.

Did you or someone else have a bad experience? Not really/not that I know of. Sometimes it's a little awkward, but I don't expect people to be perfect. I'm not perfect myself. I find most people take themselves too seriously.

Are you afraid it will be silly because you have no doll? N/A

Are you nervous it would make you want to purchase new dolls? No, I can't say I've been significantly influenced to purchase due to seeing a doll IRL.

Are you expecting, with all the youth on DoA, a group of immature, loud, sex-crazed teenagers who'll grab your doll without asking and strip it naked? (Heh.) Oh no, I've found the younger set to be quite well mannered! In fact they're usually shy as anything. Sometimes they get into groups and pose their dolls in suggestive poses and such, but it doesn't bother me, though I don't participate. I haven't seen any terrible behavior. I'm not sure what I'd do if I did. I can be outspoken when I feel it necessary, but then again I might just leave the venue without saying anything. It'd depend on the situation.

Raven

 

Well, whatever reason folks have for being quiet is their business. I can understand if someone has social anxiety, but it doesn't mean I have to like being around that. Call me lazy or insensitive if you like, but I'd rather not have to make a huge effort to get a conversation going with strangers at a meet. So, now I only meet up with doll collectors I know are relaxed and happy in a group setting (though honestly I haven't gone to any doll-themed meet in a while).

I'm sure everyone has their personal reasons for being quiet and shy, but really, it's a major reason I felt uncomfortable at area-themed meets (instead of meets set up among friends). Trying to relax in a room full of socially awkward strangers is no fun for me, so it's one major reason I stopped going to meets.

 

I've never been to one mostly because there haven't been any meets close enough to me!!!! I consider anything more than a 20 minute drive to be to far away. Plus I wouldn't know what to do at a meet... I can see peoples' dolls here on DOA.... And also that completely non-social thing... I also am NOT in any way compelled to take my dolls out into the real world and show them off... And try to make people understand the hobby. Most don't. Most won't. More for us I say.

 

Partly due to bad experience and partly because I'm afraid of what others at the meet would think of me.

When I was a child, I got picked on constantly by my (Caucasian) peers and teachers... there was an incident where I was nearly left alone, a tiny six-year-old girl, in a forest after a school outing, becuase I was shorter than my White classmates and couldn't keep up. I was chastised severely afterwards for being terrified and crying in front of parents who came to pick us up. I guess I found hanging around white-skinned people more difficult after that, especially when I suspect I'm going to be the only Asian at the meet.

The people at out last Brisbane meet were charming (and thier dollies gorgeous!), though, and even put up with my sudden loss of syntax... ^ ^;

 

I am lucky to have found a group of fellow collectors that are simply wonderful! There are certain people in the state that I think are kind of rude, but they are the vast minority. It was very hard for me to go to my first meet, but in the end I am glad that I did. I have made some great friends!

 

I've been to a few meetups, but after the last one I'm probably going to take a break since I almost had a panic attack, since I haven't been very well recently and there were far too many people for me to handle.

I've always been made to feel welcome and so have my ResinSoul and Bobobie dolls.