"You Have A Problem" - Friends Who Think Your Hobby Is Wank

And green. Blue and green. Can't forget the green.

Ahem.

Anyway, what Brightfires said. There is absolutely no way that everyone will be openly accepting of your hobbies and interests (general 'you' here), because everyone's interests are different and one man's fascinating is another man's weird-as-hell. Not everyone is going to understand your enthusiasm for dolls, and that's just fine. If they're being assholes about it, well, that's another story entirely and nobody deserves that. You will find those people who share your enthusiasm, though; they may not be easy to track down, but they're worth it.

 

My mom thinks I only like them because they're expensive. And because I'm compensating for fertility issues, or because Kiddo isn't a girl, her theory changes. I don't let it get to me. They're my hobby and as long as I'm happy with them it really doesn't matter how others see my hobbies. Like Brightfires said, people don't need to like my hobby, but most of us have at least one, and whether they personally see the merit we should all try to at least respect their interests. It's easier with people who aren't family, but just remember what makes you happy.

 

Hi Skinnyneko!
I feel you.
People think that I am weird, spending so much money on Bjds, collecting them.
My dad and my friends think that I am childish. But I don't let them stop me from loving my dolls.
I created a new different instagram to express my passion (BJD and Blythes), I joined doll community and groups.
I felt much better about this hobby because I meet people who are just like me.

They may think that I am weird, or ridiculous but I agree, collecting BJD is just like collecting and creating arts!
So, don't feel bad or ashamed about this hobby We are not alone, and we are normal.

I hope you'll feel better after meeting and talking to more BJD lovers

 

Yes i do have them around and most of them are my close friends. It is indeed quite demoralising but i have come to accept that not everyone will understand this hobby. I do get a lot of people saying that I am crazy to be into this hobby and that i should spend my money on more meaningful things but i just turn a deaf ear on them.
I think of bjds as a form of art and thus i am so in love with them. No two dolls are the same even if they are the same sculpt from the sme company and i think that is what makes me love them so much . To me all hobbies are the same and people who do not understand or try to understand will never know the beauty of it

But do not be discouraged, I do actually have friends who are not in this hobby of mine but still supports me.

 

I think it's easy for people who are not involved to think of a hobby such as BJDs as ridiculous or shameful! Because we're told from a young age how things are supposed to be, BJDs are dolls, dolls are for little girls, boys do not play with dolls, adults do not play with toys... and so on.
Of course that's all BS, there's no actual difference between collecting BJDs or any other similar hobby, like collecting stamps or model airplanes.
Hobbies are meant to make you happy, give you something to do and keep you occupied.

I've always had hobbies that were not very accepted, starting with liking to draw, reading manga, playing video games - back when I was in high school, everyone was still set on how video games are a thing for little children too! Glad some things slowly change already.

But yeah, whatever, it's a hobby that makes you happy, and it's not illegal, so that's all that counts haha.

Edit: not 38, but they charged me 35$ for the shipping~

 

Yep... ridiculous...expensive.....childish.... all of that and more....my advise..... do what you love....and be happy.

 

I don't think there is anyone in my life that tries to discourage me from collecting and enjoying BJDs. Thankfully my immediate family all have a certain passion for things that most people tend to deem as 'toys', so they can appreciate that BJDs are more of a creative and art based outlet for me.

If I ever had to bring up the point of dolls being for children, I think I would remind them that children don't make 'toys', they are all designed by adults (as far as I know) so in most cases I would guess that said designers also have an active interest in dolls themselves, especially in the case of BJDs.

BJDs are made by artists and are priced accordingly and as such they cannot be separated from their origins as works of art.

 

My "Barbies" are supposed to matter? I don't even tell my family anything close to what the OT dolls really cost, won't even begin the money rant. It's a we'll remember the neighbor's dog's birthday but forgot Kim's was yesterday situation. I don't think they want to understand, insert random rant how if it doesn't matter to their narrow interests and POV it doesn't matter.

I have my online doll groups to remind me of reasons I got in to them and why I stay.

 

Wouldn't be anything new, actually. People haven't been taking my hobbies seriously ever since back in school when I was the only Star Trek fan in my class. Didn't bother me back then - doesn't bother me now.

 

I think I've said this in other threads, but nobody criticizes how much I spend on my hobby because I don't tell them. NOBODY knows what I spend on anything, much less my dolls. It's not something I feel I need to share with family or friends.


I play Sims games, and they cost around $50 for the game and $20 each for the expansion packs. My family know I play computer games, but I don't tell them what I pay for the games (I now have 3 full versions of the game and around 20 expansion packs). It's simply something I don't mention and nobody asks.


Personally, I think anyone who doesn't have some kind of hobby or interest is wierd. Even the pastor of my church has a hobby - he collects videos of old cowboy movies and cowboy memorabilia.

Edited to add:
This thread is not the thread I posted in, and my answer doesn't make sense because the original question was different. I know there are too many similar threads, but the one this was originally in, was totally different. Sorry to anyone who gets confused reading my answer because of this.

 

I really don't care about others opinions regarding my hobby. If they don't understand or like it that's their problem not my own. I won't let anyone make me feel ashamed for something I love and enjoy. My friends are generally supportive and they ask me questions and love to see my dolls. They understand that this hobby is me. My family may not like the dolls because they think they are creepy but they all agree that the hobby is perfect for me and don't give me a hard time about owning them. My fiance is completely supportive, understanding and lets me buy whatever my heart desires. He doesn't restrict me at all. He even asks me about my plans, knows all of my dolls by name and some of their stories. He even has his favorite. His is the only opinion I take to heart. He has been very helpful and has saved me from making mistakes that I would have regretted later.

 

Lots of good points here!

My husband thinks I'm childish, but he also thinks it's cute when I'm being childish, so no issue there. XD My sister and most of my closest friends are in the hobby, then there are some family and friends who think it's cool I'm so creative and passionate about it but don't understand the thrill themselves. They're still respectful.

To those who don't get it, and do make rude comments, I usually just throw it back at them that I don't enjoy their hobbies, but I'm not hateful about it. I have a friend who is more than a little obsessed with fitness and muscle building. Another can't go a day without talking about or buying guns. Another has spent more on designer purses than I have on all of my dolls and accessories combined. None of those things interest me, and I would be bored to death forcing myself to share those interests, but I respect that my friends are happy.

No matter how weird some people may think I am for liking dolls, I don't feel bad about doing something that makes me happy. I was never known as a 'normal person' anyway!

 

I have too many niche hobbies to be fazed by it. I partake in my hobbies for my own enjoyment after all. People may not agree with them but they accept the fact that they are part of what makes me, me.

 

My mom thinks the dolls are way too expensive and I'm pretty sure the rest of my family will as well. I don't think my mom took me wanting to own a doll seriously when I just got started looking into the hobby. I think she thought I just wanted it because I was a kid, but obviously that wasn't the case. As for the rest of my family, I don't think I'll end up telling them because I'll most likely get bashed for it. Some will probably think it's childish, some might think it's crazy. It's kind of upsetting that they can't be more open minded, but at the end of the day, I only really care about what makes me happy and not what other people think.

 

I get some negative comments about my hobbies from some family and friends. Most of the time it being about my anime figures since more of them come in than dolls. My mom will say things like, "oh you bought another toy" or "When are you ever going to grow up?" It can be very disheartening because this is what I find enjoyable.

Most of my other friends and family find my hobbies interesting. My grandma even loves my dolls and she loves the fact that they've brought me back into sewing again. I was even able to get closer to one of my aunts by talking to her about my dolls. My friends love how I photograph my dolls and other figures. Plus, I've even gotten a friend into collecting dolls too. She collects OT dolls but dolls nonetheless.

 

There's never any reason to be rude about it, since having dolls hurts no one. Though i think you should always make sure you take care of things you need to take care of before you spend so much money on dolls that you cant even afford to live. If people are making negative comments toward the actual dolls, and arent just showing concern for your spending habits because they care about you (which i think is fair), then that's a bit messed up. Your friend honestly didnt seem to show concern, just a little rudeness. World of warcraft and smoking are awesome things lol

 

The money I spend on dolls would be a whole different issue if I were still living with my parents. When I was in my teens and living at home, I would never have been able to spend so much on any hobby. I had a job back then, but it paid very little, and once I left school I had to start paying rent to my parents. I would never have been able to afford to buy BJDs.


But now that I'm an adult, I don't have to justify my spending with anyone but myself. I live by myself, so it's easier to have a hobby like this, but on the other hand, If I get in trouble because I overspend, it's all on me to find a solution.

 

My SIL said something like this to me not long ago when I first got into the BJD's. First couple of BJD's they went unremarked but then as I got a few and then got some accessories she made that comment that my new hobby was looking a tad more expensive than just buying a few Barbies or a Tonner type doll once in a while and that maybe I should rethink it given the expense. I was at their place, sitting in their bedroom, so I just looked at her then went into her closet and got out her latest designer bag and her latest pair of designer shoes. It was about $500 worth of shoes and bag and FYI there are at least 50 combos just like that in her closet. She's got designer shoes like Jennifer Lopez has designer shoes. It's not just a couple of special pairs. It's a major thing with her and she thinks nothing of dropping $200-300 for a pair of shoes or a matching designer bag.

I put the shoes and the bag on the bed beside her, gestured towards the closet and said "You were saying?" She laughed but she got my point. The contents of her closet completely overshadowed the cost of my BJD collection, many times over. Her defense was that "at least she could wear them" but I didn't let her get away with that. I made it very clear that I'd rather have $20 shoes and a BJD than $200 shoes and none. Fact is her coffee budget each month is way more than my doll budget and she spends 10X what I spend on dolls in a year, maybe more, on shoes and bags. So she's got no room to talk about my "expensive" hobby. She wastes more money than anyone I know and she has no job to pay for any of it. My brother foots her bills and has since they were married. He can afford it but whatever, it's still a lot of money to just drop on coffee, shoes and bags all the time, IMHO. I can think of much better things to be spending my money on, but to each his or her own. I don't touch criticizing her collection so long as she doesn't touch criticizing mine...

 

I have a friend like that. It is tiresome. I don't think I have a problem, I am quite capable of not buying. I buy dolls as rewards for things I am in the process of achieving. They are there for a purpose.
I agree that the accessories and the floating heads make the hobby more expensive. They, indeed, are indulgences. Their aim is to add to my happiness.

 

I'm honestly grateful that my friends aren't judgemental of my hobbies, just like my parents, and I don't feel so ashamed talking about my dolls and plans with them. When I'm talking about my expenses, I know they'll be thrown off because who spends almost $700 on one naked doll? (Apparently I do lol). My friends are mature and they know to mind their own business when they aren't involved in it, and I'm old enough to earn money for myself and my other needs.

I always make it an important reminder to everyone with hobbies to not be ashamed of them if they bring happiness to you, of course if they are problematic and unjustifiable then that's where people should step in.